Question: Hi, I am new to the site and just looking for a little advice. I am preg from a man i've been with on and off for 3 years. He was living with me and back and fourth with his other baby mom... I found out i was preg after he moved out.. I love him w/ all my heart but i know he is not a good person. He has a dead end job.. Lives with his ex who he swears on his son's head he is not havin sex with.. this girl bought him a car and lets him live there for free just so he will be there for his child.. he says he loves me and wants to be with me but his job and his baby mom house is an hour away so its so hard for us to see each other.. i want to believe he is not sleeping w/ her but i feel so stupid for believing something like that.. considering he has lied about so much already and is damn good at it.... he already has a bunch of kids that live out of state.. but i know if he ever does move back here it will just be temporary until his baby mom figures a way to buy him back... i refuse to pay for his bills like she does... but for some reason i still want him back... not sure what to do.. I really feel i should run as fast as i can away from him but i love him so much even though he doesnt show me love in anyway.. all he can do is just say it... anyone out to talk w/ me??? tired of crying alone everynight wishin for a man that isnt even worth my time... ?
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Answer: pretty the question you have to ask yourself is 'what do i deserve, do i deserve better than this man'. If your answer is yes then you know it is your gut feeling trying to tell you whats right for your mental health and wellbeing. if your answer is no then it shows how much turmoil your mind is in at the moment, so many women (like his other baby's mom) settle for loser guys simply because they are the father of their child. it may seem ideal but in reality it isnt, it will just waste years and years of your life thinking everything will one day be all good and one day you will both be content and happy. the guy is lying about his ex gf, i could bet my house on it. she is that desperate to cling onto him she is most definately 'offering' him something to keep him there, other than money and a roof over his head, and he knows it! otherwise he would have got himself away from her ages ago! i mean just think how easy it would probably be if he wanted to have sex with you now? men know that ex's are so vulnerable that they tend to jump back into bed with the man in an attempt to keep hold of him somehow. but it doesnt work, he gets his use out of you till he gets bored of you and starts doing exactly the same thing to another 'baby mom' of his. this guy is not going to do you any good. i only hope you are strong enough and confident enough to ask yourself that question and get rid of the loser. =
Answer: How many children does this Don Juan have and are they all in one family or not...? What is his involvement in their lives...? Does he work? =
Answer: Hi pretty - I agree 100% with Cat - I also think you should ask your self if you deserve better (the answer being yes!!) and I would also bet my house that he is sleeping with the other woman - you said you really feel you should run as fast as you can from him - and I say RUN!! I am not saying if he wants a healthy relationship with your child to deny him that - but for yourself - dont put up with it! =
Answer: embarrasing to say how many he has... but he has 2 from his ex wife..(pays cs for them) 2 from ex girl (no cs) one from this girl here the other ones are in VA... OH wait and not to mention has 2 more that he never sees.. so my child makes it number 9... yeah now i am just one more baby mother of his.. i know i should run but it is just so hard b/c i love him, yet i know he is no good for me.. i thank you guys for the truth b/c i quess i tried to ignore reality and think of what i dream of "happy family".. i have a good career, own house, car and future.. he has nothing.. =
Answer: pretty i think you know that you deserve better than this guy and so as long as you arent completed blinded by being in 'love' with him, im sure you will pull through it. just think of all the millions of mums who do and they do an excellent job of raising their children. he sounds like a total user really, for all you know he might be using his ex's still for sex whenever he fancies it because he knows they are vulnerable because they have one or 2 of his kids. you don't have to stay with a guy that will make you unhappy, your little son/daughter would much prefer a happy mommy who is strong and brave rather than a downtrodden mommy who is only with loser daddy because she has a kid with him. im sure you will pull through it. there are loads of supportive single mums on here who will be able to help you. good luck =
Answer: I totally feel you pretty I have also been seeing this guy on oand off for the past 1 1/2 and I am so in love with him but he wont even tell me he loves me back. Im waiting now for the end of the month because im pretty sure that i am now pregnant. Hes not a bad guy or anything but he pays me and my feelings no mind. The hard part about all of this is I am still legally married but separated. Pretty I feel like woman are queens and we should never have to chase after a man for no reason you deserve better and there is someone out there who will love you and tak care of you not the other way around. I say ditch his ass and rasie your baby and find you a good hard working man. Best of luck to you.. =
Answer: Well thanks for all of the advice... I have really looked into my life and what i want and need.. and have realized he is not one of those things. i havent told him yet, but i am going to do this without him. if he wants to be there for the baby, great i will welcome that.. I havent told him as of yet but am confident this is the right decision for me, my daughter and my new baby! (funny thing reason i havent told him is b/c his broke ass had his phone turned off, not to mention he quit his job before he had another one lined up,what a winner) so now i am truly single and pregnant.. but i dont think i can say that b/c i have a whole gang of friends and family willing to help out in anyway.. Thanks again for listening :) and i think things will be okay! =
Answer: Good luck! And you will be just fine. I mean i have my family behind me too and i am sooo scared but I know i can do it. =
