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He Seems To Not Care!!

3 posts on this thread and the last post was on March 22nd, 2005 1:21 AM
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Max - March 15th, 2005 1:08 PM
 [Original Post]

I'm not married but I've been dating my boyfriend for almost 2 years & we just found out that I was 6 months pregnant. I never got any of the pregnancy symptoms like most women & since I don't have a normanl menstrual cycle I had no idea. It's now been a month since we found out about our little surprise & it seems like he's not stressed out at all about having this baby... like he doesn't even care. He keeps talking about things he wants to get for himself... expensive things... while I'm sitting here trying to budget so that we can afford everything for her!! It upsets me so much and when i talk with him about it he tells me not to worry... that he'll have money for the baby... but I know how much he makes and how much he has in savings and the things he wants are totally unnecessary & very expensive. When it comes to talking about things for the baby he says that it won't cost that much... but baby's are expensive and he doesn't seem to understand this!! I'm hoping this is just some phase he's going through & maybe it just hasn't hit him yet that we're having a baby... but come on... I can't go through this alone!! Is this normal behavior for fathers to be... will he change??

Misty - March 15th, 2005 5:07 PM

Maybe he just doesn't understand how expensive things are. Why don't you go do some shopping around and figure out exactly how much it will cost for you to get a crib, a diaper changing station, crib sheets, clothes, diapers, ect... then come and show him just how much this is really going to cost you. You only have 3 months left before the baby is born, that isn't that long. But he is a guy, guys don't normally go looking through the mall at how expensive baby stuff is. I'm sure he just doesn't realize. Show him how wrong he is. : )

To Misty - March 21st, 2005 5:33 PM

I appreciate the advise but I've already tried it. I even took him with me to the store and he just tells me "oh that's not expensive." Every time I go to any store I always look to see if there is something I need or want to buy for the baby and I do... he hasn't even spent a cent of his own money to buy anything... not even a bib!! Luckly... I have a wonderful sister that is throwing me a baby shower & hopefully with the help of my friends I'll get most of what I need for our daughter... since it seems like she's not going to get what she needs from him. I can only hope that he'll wake up and realize we're having a baby & that she should be #1 priority... not his childish desires!!

Jbear - March 22nd, 2005 1:21 AM

Baby stuff doesn't have to be as expensive as you think. There are a lot of stores that seem to specialize in overcharging new parents. I found everything my daughter needed at garage sales and thrift stores. Your baby won't know if everything is new or not, and you can use the money you save on essentials like diapers and formula.