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I'm sorry if I sound rude, that is definitely not my intention but I seriously think you need to relax. Nothing about having a pelvic exam is sexual to either the doctor OR the patient. I promise you that no one is getting off while doing the exam. Your wife is probably very uncomfortable and the doctor doesn't think twice about anything the moment your wife walks out the door. By you being this uptight, it is probably stressing your wife out, which she doesn't need. I know it's easier said than done but try it.

ummmm i think you seriously nees some counseling.. and im not being funny. There is nothing wrong with having a male obgyn. I think you have security issues here, and feel very insecure about your relationship with your wife. Im not sure about childhood instances ( maybe you were molested ) , but your behavior is not normal and you really need to chill before it overcomes your life.

I totally agree with both of these responses!!! Male docs don't think twice about the exams they have to do! And the on call policy (rotating docs), that is very true so the manager wasn't telling you some BS about that. The docs at my OB's office rotate on call, but I still see my reg OB, I just make sure I schedule my appts on the days that she is there. You sound like maybe you don't have a trusting relationship, on your behalf. I have to agree with ash2, counseling may not be a bad idea. Good Luck!!!

well i do agree on some level with the others on the part where pelvic exams are definitly no fun for the patient and drs i know dont think twice about it. but i can understand your level also i mean i defninly wouldnt like for a bunch of female dr to female my husbands private parts although i prolly wouldnt get that bent out of shape about it i wouldnt like and would request for another dr but you let everyone know how you feel and if you dont feel comfortable about i suggest you maybe talk to you new drs about it and make a trip to labor and delivery and talk to pre admission about it and see what they say good luck and i hope things go better for you.

All I see here is me me me me.. Its your wife being examined, imagine how it feels for her, especially when you are describing it as "a form of adultery" shes going to be thinking shes done something wrong. You need to set your priorities right here. Your wife needs the best possible care, ie the best doctors, regardless of their sex. Thats whats important. I really think you're going too far with this, going into the point of panicking about who is going to be in the room when she has the caesarean.. Thats going to be the least of her worries at the time, would you rather she has a serious operation performed by a female less competent (and NO I'm not saying they are) than experienced practitioner just because he's male. Believe me theres nothing sexual about Dr-patient relationships. She wont be laying naked on an operating table! The only parts of her showing will be where she will be cut, and her head! And I doubt many men will be thinking sexually when a heavily pregnant woman is having her guts cut open anyway... Come on, I know its not nice, but its all part of having children, it not a nice business, and if you cant deal with it maybe stop getting her pregnant! You're going to be making her feel terrible being so disgusted when you have sex

I'm sorry, but it sounds you are the one that has the issue on this. You are the only one that is sexualizing these very normal medical procedures and examinations. It is not sexual but you are making it to be, and maybe you should try to figure out why.

bumblebee, that is exactly why i am here. it sounds like most of you dont share the same view that i do about these male docs, and i dont know how many of you are christians, but i have read the bible extensivly, have been a Christian pretty much my whole life, and i have never found a verse to suggest that is acceptable for a married woman to expose her nakedness to another man other than her husband. if anyone can show me otherwise i will stop posting. It is more than jealousy, i really feel like making a stand on this. and it sure seems like a lot of people are trying to hang me just for thinks the way i do about it, but i garentee that if all husbands knew about what is involved in a pelvic exam...they would care. if they truly love their wife.

I have studied the Bible and Christianity in a consevatice Christian school for 10 years and no where in the Bible does it say that women can not show themselves to doctors for medical purposes. All of the verses that you have quoted referring to two becoming one are referring to sex and the things that the doctors are doing do not qualify as sex. When it comes down to it, you can choose to use modern day medicine and get over the fact that there are male doctors or you can choose not to. There are midwives who can also care for your wife throughout the pregnancy and delivery and they use fully female staff. The Bible was written a couple thousand years ago before there was modern gynocological care for women. I'm sure that if Jesus was alive today he would say that your wife's and babies health is the most imporant thing and you should be greatful that the male doctors are able to provide the care that they can. I can guarantee that if anything where to go wrong during the delivery you would be very greatful of a man who was able to save the lives of your wife and child. You can throw a hissy fit about it but no one is going to pay much attention to you becuase the fact of the matter is that there are male OB/GYN's and you can use a hospital for birth and have a male doctor or you can use a midwife. I would beg you to stop trying to justfy your complaints by quoting the Bible becuase the Bible doesn't say anything about male doctors vs female doctors. Your faith should not make you question care for your wife. You might think its not fair but the only thing you can do about it is use a midwife. If your wife has a problem with seeing an gynocologist then she doesn't have to take advantage of modern day medicine. But I would argue the that the Bible tells you that your body is a temple and should be taken care of and cervical cancer is a very common cancer. If you really want to play quote the Bible wars we can but Christianity is not based on legistics and details. Jesus spoke against the Jewish rabbi's of his day who were focused on the details of the rules of thier religion. My suggestion to you would be face the facts and make a choice use male doctors or use a midwife.

*conservative*

You can take that story in the Bible in Matthew, Mark, & Luke that talks about Jesus healing the woman that had a blood issue. This was probably a menstrual thing, and he healed her. Point being that "HE" healed "HER". I don't think that when Jesus was on the earth that he would have stopped a doctor from helping a woman if she was in need. Also, Luke 8:43 And a woman having an issue of blood twelve years, which had spent all her living upon physicians, neither could be healed of any,...~SPENT ALL HER LIVING UPON PHYSICIANS. DO YOU THINK THAT ALL THESE PHYSICIANS WERE FEMAIL. I HIGHLY DOUGHT THIS BECAUSE IN THOSE DAYS NOT VERY MANY WOMEN WORKED...THAT WAS THE MENS AREA OF EXPERTISE.
Lu 8:44 Came behind him, and touched the border of his garment: and immediately her issue of blood stanched.

leelani, that is the most intelligent answer i have seen so far, you are correct, and i didnt even think of that verse, i can buy into what you are saying, and i am trying to give this emotion to GOD, but with little sucess. it will depart for a little, but when i am at work, i begin to ponder on it and it really starts to slam me. pray for me.

<~~~~applauds to greg and lealani!!!!! very good answers!!!!!!! I totally agree.....women were not the bread winners back then.

Dear Mrpanicatm. I can see that you are having stuggle with this. Just remember these verses. Maybe right them down and put them in your wallet and read them at work. 1. Prov. 3v5&6: Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thine ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy paths. This is from memory...so it may be wishywashy. If you think about that verse it doesn't just have to do with trusting that men aren't looking or taking advantage of your wife. But trusting that the Lord has your wife in his hands. You don't have to understand what is going on...it is all in the will of the Lord.
2Sa 22:3 The God of my rock; in him will I trust: he is my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my high tower, and my refuge, my saviour; thou savest me from violence. If you really have the will to change and want what is best for your life you can do it. Here is a verse that says what I mean... Php 4:13 I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. I hope this helps. God Bless you and your family. In our prayers...Lani-lee

sorry it was about 2 am. my time and spelling and grammar are not my strong suits!

I am in fact a Christian, and am the kind of person that is very conservative and modest, and find many things in this world to be highly inappropriate. And this is just my opinion, but I think you are wrong on this issue. Have you ever had a female doctor examine you or possibly- GASP!- examine your private parts for purely medical reasons? And I'm sure you didn't think anything of it as it was not sexual in nature. I can at times have a very obsessive personality and it can be difficult for me to get over certain things. I think you might be the same way as me. The fact that you are thinking of these images while you are making love to your wife tells me this. So stop obsessing about it!! I know it seems like too simple of an answer, but that's really the only way to get over it. Just stop thinking about it and enjoy your beautiful children! Good luck!!

ok you or your wife is a liar she would not be getting a pap at 7 months prego they only do that at the beginning of the pregnancy.....and no he would not have done that with out a female nurse in the room as well there are very strict laws about that sort of thing these days and the doctor forgot to get the sample whatever I really do not think you are being honest I think your some kind of jelouse jerk that can't stand the thought of another man seeing your wife's privates and that is just dumb grow up really there is NOTHING SEXUAL ABOUT A PAP TEST!! Gosh if your wife had any sense at all she would leave you before you go O.J on her and the doc!!!!!!