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Angry About Male Doctors Examing My Wife

132 posts on this thread and the last post was on April 1st, 2009 11:21 PM
There are currently 4872 members logged in.
MrsShelton217 - May 8th, 2007 11:09 AM

oops.. not palm of elbow.. haha... who knows what I was thinking. I meant the elbow facing the patients head


MrsShelton217 - May 8th, 2007 11:13 AM

WrightofWay, and Slowpoke. I agree, I think this "man" is just another Troll on a forum just begging for attention. If "he'' really is this paranoid... someone ...please...commit him into a psych ward for a SERIOUS mental evaluation....


slowpoke01 - May 8th, 2007 11:31 PM

that is what i think mrs shelton. especially since this was like his 4 or5 kid he should know what goes on at the appointments by now. i think he is just trying to scare other men and cause them to be paranoid everytime that their lady goes to the doc.



MrsShelton217 - May 9th, 2007 10:45 AM

I agree. I have seen a lot of Trolls on these forums, and they are here to cause nothing but trouble. I have found the easiest way to rid of them is to report them, and click on the "poor taste?" icon next to the posts... The moderators eventually get the idea that these people need to be removed form the forums.. :)


mrpanicatm - May 10th, 2007 6:17 PM

oh....you think im a troll because my opinion is differant from yours? i hope this forum has been educational to some men that may not be aware of what goes on at the male gynecologist office. maybe they will have a differant view too if they read. i still maintain my position, and the reason why i posted i suppose i wanted to see if anyone else felt the same way, however it looks like the only people that answer questions are people in the medical field, probably a bunch of male RN OB wannabes that cant wait to get their hands dirty(pun intended) and that want to justify their position. because hey, who wants to give up what i mentioned earlier.


wrightofway - May 10th, 2007 11:24 PM

I'm not in the medical field, and i don't think you're a troll. But... I do have some concerns about you and your wife. If you didn't want a male doctor -- how come you never asked for a referral to a female doctor in the first place? When attending appointments...did you not ask what the doctor was going to do specifically? And if you have so many children... how come you continued to use a male doctor if you were sooo uncomfortable with him? Further...with so many kids, wouldn't you have KNOWN what to expect from the doctor's examinations? And again... I ask... please advise me as to the specific procedure that was done which involved the doctor putting his fingers in the vagina and the anus at the same time? You ignored the question in your most recent post -- without a specific answer to this... I will continue to believe that you are lying -- or that you need to seek legal counsel for an inappropriate act. And last but not least... if you knew what the doctor was going to do (ie: internal exam) why consent to it?? Your story is not plausible the way you are presenting it. As for being uncomfortable with a male gynecologist... I"m sure many men and women feel the same way for various reasons... but they are smart enough in most cases to seek out services from someone they ARE comfortable with. Clearly... you and your wife were not smart enough to take this step for some reason.


MrsShelton217 - May 11th, 2007 2:25 PM

I think you are a troll simply b/c you have been going on and on and on and on about this SAME thing now for over 6 months. The baby has been born already... let it go... enough is enough. Some of the things you have claimed are almost obsurd. There is no exam where the fingers are placed in the rectum and vagina... If this DID happen... It's your fault that you didn't report it. If the things keep happening that you say they do... why don't you do something about it??



slowpoke01 - May 11th, 2007 11:45 PM

I agree with WRIGHTOFWAY on this. you have been asked the same questions over and over and have not answered them yet. I am not in the medical field but I do know women who have had kids and when I have asked them if they have had this test, they say no. I am a female and would rather a male look at me than a female, simply because I have had a female hit on me before. Never have I had a male do anything inappropriate to me. Also, before my doc does any exams he tells me exactly what they are checking for and tells me exactly what he is going to do. Also, he is never in the room without a female nurse supervising. If your wife was not comfortable with a male doc then she should have found a female doc before she decided to get pregnant again. I cant believe that after all these numerous problems with male docs and both of you being uncomfortable with them that she had a male doc do all of these exams. We are still waiting to know what that test was that the doc had to insert a finger into the rectum and vagina at the same time because as all of us women have said there is no such a test. Go get you and your wife some counseling before you decide to have any more kids....PLEASE...and let this go. I cant believe that you are still tripping over it..your kid is born spend time with it and use the energy that you are putting in this thread towards your kid.


mrpanicatm - June 7th, 2007 7:00 PM

do a google search for rectovaginal exam.


wrightofway - June 8th, 2007 9:01 PM

Rectovaginal exams are done when doctors are looking for a mass or a tipped uterus. THey are NOT done during pregnancy -- instead... ultrasounds are the preferred diagnostic tool. Since you claim to have previous children... the doctor would have already known if the uterus was tipped or not -- as it would have been discovered through a routine ultrasound, or regular pelvic exam. If he was looking for a mass... he'd have used the ultrasound -- probably an internal vaginal scan which is far more advanced at locating masses. Its interesting to note that you recommend people search the rectovaginal exam on google. Clearly -- this is what you did in order to come up with what you hoped would be a viable response that would validate your claims. Too bad you didn't really do your homework to find out that these are contraindicated during pregnancy. And even if by chance this exam WAS performed (which I highly doubt!)... the doctor would've had a nurse observe, and would've explained what he was about to do anyhow... so someone had to give consent for that to happen. If you both were not comfortable with it, you should have declined. Since you didn't... and since its been sooo long I suggest you simply get over it! And get over yourself while you're at it! I find that your story is about as realistic as a fairy tale. I do not believe any of it. Nor do I believe you have children. I think that you are merely a troll... seeking to stir up a debate on the board for you own amusement. I for one am done discussing this particular issue -- you clearly have no idea what you're talking about. Last but not least here is my suggestion... go back to google and see if you can get it to tell you where your brain is at.


MrsShelton217 - June 22nd, 2007 12:45 PM

Try googling this: Psychiatrists in __________(whatever town you are from)


krissy2006 - July 25th, 2007 3:01 PM

First I wanted to state I realize this post is very old and that everything is said and done now.... But I also wanted to address some of this ridiculousness. mrpanicatm, first I would like to say I agree with you 100%. I don't think you are a troll, I don't think you need a psychologist or a psychiatrist or any kind of therapy. I think you're worries, concerns, jealousy and all your other feelings are justified. She is your wife and who cares if you are justified by American/Canadian/Western Ideals, this is how you feel period, ended. My husband feels the same way and I feel the same way about him and female doctors. I just don't like it and he doesnt like it either. I will not ever have a male obgyn, and he will never have a female urologist. It is completely acceptable to feel this way in my opinion. To everyone else who has taken it upon themselves to be judgemental, I am sure mrpanicatm was not asking for your confirmation of his feelings. He was asking what he can do, legally, to make sure his wife doesn't see another male physician. No one really cares what your opinions are and no one's opinion on the internet is going to change someone else's. What do you people get for bashing this poor man? In any case, I have my BA in Theology and nowhere in the bible does it state that a woman cannot have a male doctor. It states that lustful thoughts alone are basis for adultery but if you see a male doctor this does not mean you have lustful thoughts. This said, just because the bible permits opposite sex doctor patient relationships does not mean that everyone on the planet has to be comfortable with it! mrpanicatm, I didnt read through the entire thread. Just tried to wade through all the Bullshit, but if you go on to have your 5th child it may be beneficial for your wife to see a midwife instead of an obgyn. about 99% of midwives are female and are much more hospitable than normal obgyns as well as labor is usually much easier with fewer complications as they are big on letting things happen "naturally".... :) OK I am getting down off my soap box. :)


MrsShelton217 - July 25th, 2007 4:14 PM

My problem regarding this person is that he claims they have had multiple children, and yet each time he is insecure about using a male OB... You'd think after one, or maybe even two bad experiences... they would use their own judgement and use a different doctor... OR better yet, switch doctors, AND report what had been happening.... It's their own fault that they are putting themselves back into the situation time and time again for this doctor to continue to be unprofessional.


krissy2006 - July 25th, 2007 4:48 PM

I agree with your point MrsShelton, but in reality, a lot of people dont have a choice about who they go to. Depending on insurance polciies, whether they are HMO, PPO, state or God forbid Kaiser... or if they are our of the USA. A lot of people dont have a lot of options. But you are right in the sense, if they have the option to choose they needed to live by the motto, you burn me once shame on you, you burn me twice, shame on me. I just don't think all the bashing is necessary let alone mature in the situation.


Jezebel - March 20th, 2008 10:06 PM

i know, i know, the thread is almost a year old but i REALLY couldnt help myself here....mrpanic you need HELP. for real. and some anatomy lessons. does your wife have a 'clit' the size of a mack truck? the urethra is nowhere near the clitoris. as for male obgyns mine is male and i adore him. generally i saw his nurse practitioner just b/c its hard to get an appt w/him b/c he has to cancel often due to deliveries but i saw him again today for the first time in over a year and he was so gentle and he is so kind. the day i met him i knew he was going to deliver my children. he has done many procedures on me as well and i wouldnt leave his practice for anything. when the time comes for me to actually give birth, if i end up w/one of the female drs i will be very upset. as far as shaving AFTER inserting a catheter...ummmm....no. i dont know where you live but they dont shave vaginas here...if you want it shaved prior to a vaginal delivery then you can shave it...baby is coming out regardless. if a catheter is inserted then a c-section is being performed at which point why would they care about hair on the vagina anyway...theyre about to cut open a belly, not braid pubic hair. your posts make no sense.


Tasman Bay Butterfly - April 6th, 2008 2:43 PM

As a healthcare worker, I have to see exposed privates of the opposite sex. I don't enjoy it, but somebody has to do it and trust me when I say that you lose every once of sexual imagination. It's even difficult for me when it comes to my husband because of it. Don't sweat it. For your info, my male OB/GYN has treated me with more respect and dignity than any female ever has. You just have to trust the Dr. as long as he treats your wife with the respect and dignity she deserves during an uncomfortable time as that.