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As a healthcare worker, I have to see exposed privates of the opposite sex. I don't enjoy it, but somebody has to do it and trust me when I say that you lose every once of sexual imagination. It's even difficult for me when it comes to my husband because of it. Don't sweat it. For your info, my male OB/GYN has treated me with more respect and dignity than any female ever has. You just have to trust the Dr. as long as he treats your wife with the respect and dignity she deserves during an uncomfortable time as that.

Ounce, not once...lol

I know this thread is old and also seen someone else resently posted. But for future men reading this my doc is male, but it is a small office and i have a long trusted relationship with him since i was a teen. A smaller office like my doctor is independent may help also and also my dh always goes with me to help me feel more comfortable.

im a gyno student. im 24 male. i think that women themsleves dont really feel uncomfortable about male docs examining them but they get more upset when a family member is with them specially some male relative like a husband.

and let me tell you that it is completely natural for a male reletive to feel that way. i am sure that even the ones who dont react still have strange thoughts going on in their minds. its our nature.
i would recommend women to visit gynos w/o male relatives or with a female friend etc to avoid them being upset and themselves too.

women who come for checkups alone usually never have any issues and dont hesitate and do as theyre told. yes occasionaly i have noticed younger teenage girls and older women are hesitant. for anyone who feels uncomfortbale we always have a nurse present.

as far as the male doctors mentality go some peeple are afraid theyd be getting off on that. let me tell you that experinced doctors never do that. but yes when we are new to this job especially when training we can get aroused but that doesnot mean we are getting distracted from the job or trying to cop a feel intentionaly. its just a reflex action. espaecially if its an attractive female and we have to insert finger in her anus.

tell me if a female doctors examines a male and has to handle his penis wont the male get aroused?? its nothing to be ashamed of. but as i said as we get experinced we dont even think of it.

Congratulations on your baby btw. And I know where you are coming from. And because of your post ,and the fact that now I know that me and my boyfriend are not weird, we have decided on a female OB and are currently looking for one :) Just wanted to give you a positive post since there seems to be a lot of negative ones on here

i actually refused to have a male doctor! i wasnt having it! My boyfriend was like its ok but it seems weird i would be the one to refuse! I wouldnt worry about being concerned... i am sure everyone has their uncomfortable situations.. this is just one of yours! no worries!

ummmmm, dr jamie, the gyno student....yeahhhhh, you must be the youngest gyno resident in your rotation. interesting. i wasnt aware rotating residents like to be called students...especially considering they are drs. and to have completed medical school AND residency by 24...WOW huh...kudos for you.

poof: we can call this little youngin dr. doogie. lol what a liar he is.

I presume dr. jamie isn't lying, he just isn't an american dr. med programs in some other countries are accelerated and skip the undergrad degree requirement.

that said, the rest of what he said, in my opinion, is crap.

i detest vaginal exams by male docs. it makes no difference who accompanies me. i feel more uncomfortable being examined by a male than a female. for future guys reading and feeling the way mrpanic did, my ob/gyn's office is made up of 5 female docs who rotate. the only male doc i came across was the one doing my ultrasound - who's in another office. i didn't know it was a vag. ultrasound before going there. if i'm preg again, i'll avoid him too, and request a referral somewhere else.

if it bothers u, for whatever reason, talk to wifey up front and early, preferably before she picks out the doc. i've dated plenty of guys who couldn't stand it if i got a massage at the spa by a male therapist. instead of calling them nuts, i respected their wishes and requested female therapists. doctors aren't holy and untouchable - everyone is human (or there wouldn't be required medical ethics courses).

mrpanicatm, you are absolutely right to feel this way about a male doctor looking at the nakedness of your wife. The Bible says that your wife belongs to you, and that her nakedness should only be seen by you. Gen 2:25 teaches that nakedness without shame can only occur in the marriage relationship. What she is doing is adultery. What the male doctor is doing is perverted and awful. In Bible times, only midwives and the woman's husband were present at birth. We did not accept male doctors looking at naked women until the modern era. All those who love God's Word hate sin.
I too have had to endure the agony of a male doctor seeing my wife's vagina. It is something terrible when you are betrayed by the woman you love, and all my empathy goes out to you. I wish I could say that the pain will go away, but it won't. The only peace that you may have is when God judges that man who violated your wife. I pray that God will give you justice soon.

... yeah i'd consider the last poster nuts. there's respecting wishes to the extent of understanding your guy's discomfort and jealousy. but to be called an adultress over it? retarded. and anyway, if someone's that conservative, chances are they've already taken the time / effort to determine the gender of the medical help being sought and otherwise protect their choice in medical assistance.

for the record, i'm christian. not all christians are like the last poster; pls don't lump us together (if anyone was thinking it). i never saw what this guy says in the bible, but i sure did learn a'plenty about being careful and watching out for those who twist God's words. i can't stand those people, they suck big time! lame.

As a future nurse (haven't taken boards), we are taught to empathize with people. I can understand why you would be slightly panicky when your wife has to see the male dr. I'm not saying you have a psych issue but I do think it is important to talk to your wife as well as an unbiased person outside the situation. As far as the dr examining your wife alone that isn't usually common practice as far as I know. It might help, if you dont find another dr before she delivers, to request a female presence in the room (a nurse perhaps) while the dr is doing the exam. Normally a doctors physical exam contains nothing sexual, but if it makes you feel a little more reassured, you can request that. Hope this helps and Sorry to hear you're having difficulties with this...Does your wife have any objections to the male dr?

gummibear, first off, you shouldn't call someone who sincerely seeks to obey the Bible "nuts" and "retarded." You may be a Christian, but you have an un-Christian attitude. Second, there is a big difference between being a believer in Christ and being a disciple of Christ. There are a lot of people who believe in Christ to avoid hell fire, but who refuse to submit to the commandments of the written word of God. The Bible says, plainly and clearly, that a person should only be naked with his/her spouse. To uncover the nakedness of the other gender outside of marriage is sin. You know this is what the Bible teaches, whether you admit it or not. That is why pornography is wrong. If a man sat at home on his computer looking at pictures of naked women who were not married to him, any Bible-believing Christian would condemn this act as sinful. So what is the difference between this and a doctor looking at a woman who is not his wife? Remember, the Bible does not teach situational ethics. What the doctor is doing is sexual sin. Again, I ask you (assume you are married), if your wife went over to another man's house and took off her clothes for him, and he touched her, would you not consider this adultery? How then is it different if that man is a doctor? Does being a doctor give a man the right to disregard the sanctity of marriage? You know the answer.

If your wife feels uncomfortable then change. Its your personal preference...you don't need counseling. I changed doctors at 8 months for a different reason but it can be done. Some people just give off bad aura to make someone feel uncomfortable...trust your instincts. Good luck.

i'm not a heavily religiious person, so i can't quote scripture or anything, but in general a pelvic exam in a doctors office is anything but sexual. it's uncomfortable, yes. sexual, not in the least.

i will say, however, that i am not personally comfortable with a male doctor examining me. i've always been very protective of my body and feel that my husband is the only one that should see it. i'm just uncomfortable with strangers seeing me naked in general. not for religious reasons, but simply the way i feel.

at the same time, should i have needed specialized care and the best doc was male, i would have sucked it up and done what was best for the health of my baby.

since i am not comfortable with male docs, though, i sought a female ob at the outset. and i was lucky enough that all of the people (aside from my husband) in my delivery room were females. if it bothers your wife, just be honest (not hostile) with your doc. mine were all very understanding and did everything they could to make me comfortable. many offices will have a nurse or female colleague do the physical exam while they are there for instruction (usually at the side or somewhere you are not exposed).

however, if it's not something that bothers your wife, you really should just try to let it go. seek counseling perhaps. speak with your minister/pastor. they should be able to give you guidance.

i am the wife of a man in the same state you are. the pain never goes away. i hate to say it but i gave into pressure to see a male gyno before my husband and i married... it was my parents demand and i was under 18. we were not sexually active but they only wanted to hurt us and that is what they did (which proves it is a terrible thing) to this day he and i still have many problems do to this and it only happened to me once. i can only imagine how you feel. first let me say that i have read the bible cover to cover and it is error free and unlike our FEELINGS OR INSTINCTS it will never be influenced by the world around us. we are so easily swayed into believing that a man who is DR. automatically can't have a sexual guy's mind though every other single man on the face of the planet is 90% sexually minded! what utter and complete crap. i feel for your loss and it is a loss indeed. if you are able to make changes act now! God will always provide a way for us to do what is right but we are not guaranteed it will be easy. have hope. you are NOT ALONE, but it is so sad. the pain never goes away, but we should never be comfortable to deal with sin... it is a sin on both the doctor's parts and the wife (this coming from a wife in the equal state she is in) it is always hard to admitt your own guilt but sir, i am indeed guilty. i am remorseful though and have changed my ways. there was only the one single time for me and i have been ever so careful since to keep myself for my husband but it doesn't erase the one time. with the help of God you and your wife can find peace and God is JUST so you can count on him to repay the men for their lustful perverse choice of going into that feild to begin with! i hope your wife is more interested in pleasing you and doing what is MORAL and RIGHT in the eye's of God rather than what is ACCEPTABLE in the eyes of the world. i will pray for you sir.