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huh, i can even understand what you've written, let alone post an answer

Dear Nigel, you sound like you are in a lot of pain, but there are several factors you have failed to mention. Firstly, how old are you two? Secondly, did anything happen to trigger this sudden change in her behavior? And thirdly, are you sure she was as happy with you as you were with her? Pregnancy hormones can cause a woman to do crazy things but I feel like your gf is being very unfair and keeping you in the dark about something. Are you 100% sure she's pregnant? She sounds very unstable. In my opinion you need to sit down with her and perhaps include a third neutral party, to understand exactly what's happened and what's going on now so you can move on with your life. You also need to plan how you are going to share the future of this baby you made together. I wish you luck and be strong, maybe your life with her is over but yours certainly isn't!

And "..." we all make typos, you included (reread your post!)!

yeah sorry about the typos ill clean them up tonight i am 23 she is 21 nothing triggered it we were so happy i never seen it coming she was telling me she loved me and been really close all the days leading up to it as normal and i am poistive she was happy with me i know her so well and i know deep down she still loves me.and i am 100% positive she is pregnent we have visited the clinic together i just want to be a real dad and family how do i get her back will she reach out during the birth

I don't know Nigel, pregnancy is a time when women behave very strangely, there are a few other posts about men complaining of their wives behaving like teenagers and running around on them etc...Did you suggest going to a counselor together? Could she be depressed? Pregnancy hormones are very tricky and there are days when I myself just want to be left alone and throw tantrums etc...When was the last time you talked to her? Make sure when you do, you don't sound like a nag that will irritate her even more, and that you appear to respect her decisions and just want to be supportive for the time being...

Last time i talked to her was over a week ago just a call to say happy birthday im pretty sure she is not depressed i just want to know does the sound normal can you stop loving the man you are having a baby to in a matter of a few days?

Do females at this age prefer to have the dad around?

Is there anything i can do im missing the growth of my baby i want to watch her stomach grow i want to feel the first kicks.

Do you think she could fall for someone else with my baby inside her?

Women DO and SAY crazy things when they are preg. and her mother being involved might play a factor in her change of HEART, but YOU have rights- to that baby- and she HAS to give you the oppurtunity to be a part of that baby's life, and if she wants to concentrate on school so much THAN you BEING there for the BABY will help a grea deal and THEN she can't complain that she has to FACE it on her own. I'm having my first child and I wish my babys father loved me and the baby ENOUGH to grow up and be there for us (I'm 21, he's 24). He wasn't ready for a baby so he left (I wasn't ready either but I will never regret this miracle inside me). Just remember, you have rights to that baby- Good luck and i hope things don't get too ugly (bc they can)

thats messed up man, but thats women for you sometimes they never know what they want it seems. One minute they love you the next they dont, i might suggest for now man just move on you know, as hard as thats going to be for you, but you cant let your life end, im very sorry for you. good luck and i hope she comes back to you

Not to be rude Nigel but is she trying to get you for customdy or child support??? I know that is a touchy subject for most including my husband who is getting it from his EX. She sent him to jail when they were living together because he didn't give her enough money. I see that u love her and care the only advice I could say is you better get some kind of visitation rights. Does the baby have your last name??? Sorry its so negative but by the sound of it you might want to prepare for the negative just in case. I am 6 months pregnant and the last thing I would want to do is purposely leave my backbone in this pregnancy for NO REASON. Maybe she will come around.

It sounds like she's got some serious hormonal issues going on. Has she ever taken meds for depression before? It could be that the hormonal imbalance triggered a depression episode, and she's just as lost and confused as you are. I suggest sitting down and having a heart-to-heart talk with her.

why blame hormones for such a strong decision, i had hormones going on too but i would never leave my partner, nigel i know the pain u are going thru and i am so sorry, my partner left 2 weeks ago, our baby is 5 mths and i know that pain that u are experiencing, its a killer and u somehow have to be strong. I dont know just like u how one day someone can want u and the next day they dont, try being together 4 years.. my ex is having a crisis right now, hates his job, hates where he lives, hates his fave sport, he is a mess, maybe ur girl is a mess too for her own reasons and sometimes ppl need to be left alone for a while. email me at gemma27@yahoo.com... i'm there with ya right now and unless you are there too noone in this world can understand the depths of the pain u are feeling and i am sorry this happened to u nigel as u sound like a very lovely guy, remember if its meant to be its meant to be and its as simple as that ........ take care of u okay and stay busy otherwise u go nuts, god bless..ally