• Week by Week
  • Sex and Pregnancy
  • Weight Gain
  • Exercise and Nutrition

New to the forum? Sign Up Here!

Already a member? Please login below.

Forgot your password? Need Help?  
Learn and Discuss About...

AM I A BAD MOM????

6 posts on this thread and the last post was on November 23rd, 2006 1:08 AM
There are currently 4882 members logged in.
afwife - August 22nd, 2006 7:34 PM
 [Original Post]

Ok....my baby is 15 days old now. My husband left Saturday on his deployment and will be gone for 6 months. We knew he was going to have to leave and as hard as it is, I just have to suck it up and do this on my own. However, my mom is helping out a lot while hubby is gone as I am also finishing up school. But she and I decided that she would keep the baby at her house one night a week so that i can catch up on sleep, studying and housework and just to give me a little break. Tonight is the first night she's keeping him and for some reason, I"m feeling a little guilty about it. Am I a bad mom for letting my mom keep my 2 week old baby for the night? I really do feel like it's the best thing, just to help me keep my sanity which in turn, makes me a better mother to him, but at the same time...i feel a sense of guilt. What do you all think?

ashley - August 22nd, 2006 8:43 PM

personally, I would ask that your mom spend the night at your house and just get up with the little bub because you may not catch up on your sleep while he's away if you are anything like me. I worried more the first time my daughter slept away from me. I couldn't bare her being away for the longest time and I had to go get my daughter because I couldn't sleep. I kept thinking things like what if she is crying and needs me. What if she thinks I left her. This is the time they build trust. I would just try and ask your mom to come over and help, not take him all together. just my humble opinion though. I think for your sanity you'd do better.

sahmof3 - August 22nd, 2006 8:52 PM

Hehe. Get used to the guilt. I think 90% of motherhood is second-guessing yourself. I don't think you're a bad mom, just one that knows how to ask for what she needs, which is a good thing:)

jas - August 25th, 2006 8:19 AM

I don't think it's any different then if your hubby was home and he took him for the night to let you sleep - you are not a bad mom at all, in fact, I would say you are lucky - my mom is 1/2 way around the world (we are stationed in Japan) so when dh goes TDY, I am all there is....


Hana - October 7th, 2006 5:36 PM

afwife, im staying with my mother for a while and every two or three days she takes the baby upstairs with her to give me a peaceful night's sleep. I feel guilty but then i think of the days im sleep deprived and feel that im going to do a better job of looking after my son when i have enough sleep and all energised..dont feel guilty!

lexa - November 21st, 2006 5:23 PM

You are not a bad mother! Every GOOD mother needs a break to keep her sanity and to still efficiently run a household! It is perfectly natural to feel guilty the first few times you leave your baby for whatever reason. You are fine. Take your breaks when you need them. Besides, our babies need breaks from us as well!

pinkbo0tlace - November 23rd, 2006 1:08 AM

No!! :) You are not a bad mom at all, silly. Good mothers KNOW when they can get stressed out. You are being a good mother by staying in school too! Good job! Not everyone can do that - lt's rough when your a parent & student. I think that is a good idea. You NEED a break, you NEED to study to be able to get decent markings. One night a week vs. a stressfull mom? :) It's an easy choice!