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hes running away because hes married, and your having his baby. He saw you as someone who he felt safe with, and most likely feels trapped now that you are pregnant. You were just the other woman for a while, and now are having his baby. Hes scared. Even thought you tell him that you dont want him to take care of the baby he doesnt believe you, and may be thinking that you got pregnant on purpose to get some of his money. Good luck

He is running because he lied to you about caring ! They all lie and when faced with the fact that this child will destroy his REAL life he will no longer need or want you. It will do much good for him since you are clearly not who he intends to be with for the rest of his life !

Try to move on and find someone who is actually available and willing to take care of you and your children!

My pride is more important to me then his money. Yesterday I told my family and co workers about my situation and everyone has been very supportive. That definattely is keeping my spirits up. He wanted to keep the relationship going if I had an abortion. Right now I am completely discusted by him and that he wanted me to kill my baby. He has told me that in the past many woman had abortions for him and even his wife had three. Just the thought of that is giving me goosebumps. What a selfish man he is. Destroying emotionally all these woman instead of having a vasectomy so he could never hurt anyone again. I know realize that he is not worth killing my baby over, I cannot belive I didnt realize this before.

This guy sounds like a real jerk. He should feel bad about getting numerous women including his wife pregnant and then urging them to have abortions. I say you do what you want and that's obviously to keep the baby so go for it! He's mad because you’re not doing what he wants you to do and he's probably also scared that this will get back to his wife. It's no longer fun and games for him now so he's ready to bail on you. I say take him for child support because he should be responsible.

And I dont think at all he is running because you want his money. I mean who thinks like that nowadays unless your a celebertiy or clearly a millionaire! Whatever.....anyways the guy doesn't love you , doesn't care for you or any woman hes asked to kill his children. HE is dirty and you need to move on ...that simple!

I am starting to belive that he doesnt care also. First of all, how could he try to force me to abortion knowing that I believe abortion is the worst thing in the world. Second, you trully get to know people in crisis and this is the crisis. Third if you really love someone you cant leave them no matter what. The though of being a single mom with two kids scares me a little, but its not that bad because I have lived all this before and my final reward is my wonderful son 6 year old son. As he is the world to me his father means nothing to me. One day it will be the same with this child.

Well good luck Angelika!! I know its scary being a single mother of two kids; I'll be in the same boat. But if we did it with the first we can do it with the second. I feel the same way you do about the father of my first child, I could care less about him but I'm so happy to have my daughter. I'm sure I'll eventually get to that point with this baby's father as well. You seem smart enough to know what you need to do.

I have not posted for a while and a lot has happened since the middle of may. After I last posted the father of my child tried every method to convince me to have the abortion. He used the love lines. "Honey I love you and want to be with you I just cant be with you if you are pregnant.", He used the hate method "If you dont have an abortion I will hate you forever". He even threatened me telling me that I dont even know yet what he is capable of doing. When he did that it blew my top off and I told him that I am going to drag his a.. to court even though in the past I didnt plan that. After that he turned into a sweetheart saying, "Honey what ever you do, we will both be in peace". At that point he decided to try to play a guilt trip on me saying "I am going to tell my wife and she is going to leave me with my son and after that I dont have reasons to live". The guilt trip started working on me and he convinced me to go to an abortion clinic. We went there he filled out and signed all the paperwork for me because I refused to sign my childs death. I was the only one in the clinic with sunglasses on and tears leaking out from underneath them. I was going through an emotional breakdown and he was just sitting there and watching. Not bothered at all of what I am going through. Finally the doctor called me in, he went with me in the room where the doctor was to give me the abortion pill. The doctor looks into my sunglasses and asks me "You want to early terminate this pregnancy?" At that moment my heart stops, I cant breathe. My mouth cant say that I want to kill my baby, because I dont. He walks out of the room frustrated and the doctor explained to me, that I am the only one that can decide to have an abortion. The doctor left the room and I just started crying hysterically. About 10 minutes later the father of my unborn walks in the room saying "lets go". He is furious. I get in the car and he is screaming at me of how evil I am etc. I am writing this here because I cant tell anyone this story, even though I hate him so, for some reason I dont want my family and friends to hate him. Or maybe I am just so disappointed that someone who says he loves me allows me to go through something like this. Can someone help me understand how the mens brain works. For goodness sake a child is a new life, not the end of the world. Please someone help me understand this, maybe if I understand my feeling of betrayal will go away.

Hey there. I am in a similar situation... see my story under 30, Single & Pregnant with my First. I won't say "you should have known" because he was married.... because I know how convincing men can be. My boyfriend is going through all of the emotions just like your guy (i love you, i hate you, you've ruined my life, your selfish etc). Do you think that you are not telling your family/friends the truth about him because you secretly believe that you will be with him as a family one day and you don't want them to hate him? I have no answer as to what men are thinking. In your case, it sounds like he was just getting his kicks... leading the "bachelor" lifestyle with you. He was getting the best of both worlds. Does his wife know about you and the baby yet?

Lillybell its comforting to hear that I am not the only one dealing with a man that thinks I ruined his life. If you would like to chat sometime maybe I can email you my phone number. My email is abazarni@yahoo.com. I dont feel that I want to be with him, I just want to deal with this like two adults, not fighting, courts etc. My first childs father turned around after 5 years and he regreted that he acted the way he did. He is trying to get back together, which is impossible after all that he put me through emotionally. Actually my son is flying today to Europe and he will see him for the first time in a few days. This time around it is so much easier, because I know what to expect and I know this child will be the world to me and he will be defined as my childs father.

im so sorry that you are having such a hard time, its hard enought having an unplanned pregnancy and to be going through this as well, Good for you on not having an abortion for him. Good luck hon, ill be thinking about you.

Any married man that is having an affair is selfish, he doesnt care about his wife and kids, and he certainly doesnt care about you. He wanted to play games, but now that he is getting caught up, he is going to act like nothing ever happened, and step into the denial phase! what a jerk!!!! You have to face it, he never wanted any ties to you, he just wanted to use you! Sounds like a self centered JERK! God has plans...u keep your baby, tell his wife, and get child support...this man needs to be put into his place!!! His poor wife!! She is probably clueless, or has some idea and is hurting very badly! She deserves the truth! And plus if he is running because he thinks you want his money, its because hes scared and he knows you DESERVE his money!! Take him for all hes got! Do not get an abortion...your son deserves a little brother or sister!

i have a similar situation i was dealing with this guy for over a year ,hge had an off and on girlfriend but we was still seeing each other,but anyway in january he started talking about having kids and i gave him to him so we started our process to have a baby ,well now comes april it turns out the girlfriend is 3 months pregnant ,although i was hurt and i thought he wanted to stop trying now but he didnt ,so we got into an argument in late may and we stop speaking and then i found out june 1st that im pregnant now he wants nothing to do with me and he is scared of his girl finding out,i realized that i will be going through this alone and im prepared to deal with the struggle but i know i will def take him to court for child support!!!!

I have been there... I was dating a married man for a year and a half got pregnant and he wanted me to have an abortion and I said NO. I told him not to tell his wife and family that I would take care of ehr myself I didnt want him involved if he wanted to kill his own blood... We talked throu out my pregnancy and he promised me the world.. He was going to be there for us and leave his wife and two kids and everythign else.. When the time came 8 weeks ago when I had our daughter he came to see her once and wanted a paternity test so I gave him one and now that he knows for sure that she is his he todl his wife and his wife didnt say anything he still hasnt seen our daughter I have been stressed the past 8 weeks knowing hes not going to be there for our daughter but i have come to realize that it is his lose not mine.. So now i am a singel mom og a 5 year old and a 8 week old and 24 years old... All i need is my 2 beautiful kids... Good luck and keep you head up and you can do it... its not easy but everything will be ok... You live and learn and everything happens for a reason...

What is with you woman dating married friggin men??????????? Im sorry but if a man came to me and said "immarried" that would be enough for me to say ok well then bye bye. Im sorry but your all bashing the man for having this "affair" on his wife.. but when really the woman who he is having this affair with are just as bad and to blame aswell.. Have any of you who are with the married men every been "the wife" ..??? Well guess what I have.. and its not a nice thing to do at all to someone. I mean if he's gonna cheat on his wife.. damn straight he's cheating on you.. AND he's also sleeping with both of you. no matter what he tells you... Holy cow ladies get some self respect and leave the married men alone.. I will never ever again be cheated on because we are WOMAN and we are worth more than that.. man this brings a tear to my eye seeing everyone in here just clearly coming out and saying they are dating a married man... Does he take his ring off when you guys are having sex?? man oh man.. I don't get it sometimes.... If he didn't want to be married.. he wouldn't be.. chance are he has no intention on leaving.. I mean whywould he.. he has a woman at home taking care of him and his kids.. and thenhe has you taking care of anything else he needs.. sounds to me like these men are pretty smart.. and getting everything they want.. So STOP giving them what they want.. Tell there wives they are cheating adn your pregneat.. Then take his ass to court.. she deserves to know he's an asshole..