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I am 20 weeks pregnant with a man that I have been friends with for 9 years. We were never intimate until about 2 years ago. My mother died in Feb. and my grandmother (mom's mother) died in May and he was the only person besides family that was there for me. My mother loved him and trusted so much so she let him drive me around when we were 16 and 17 in HER car. He was a really nice guy, someone I could totally see myself with, we got together shorty after my g-ma died and everything seemed cool, I never had a reason not to trust him or think he was cheating. He tells me he is driving his friend to Florida we live in Jersey and he would be back in a few days, days turn into weeks, weeks into a month. I find out I am pregnant after he is gone for about 3 weeks (before he left I told him he was gonna like it and not come back) I confide in his cousin telling him I am pregnant and somehow he get the information and calls. He knew I was not about to have and abortion when I tell him the baby is due, get this, on my mother's birthday. He seems cool with the idea of being a dad and for a minute even a little excited. Then early one morning I get a call (like 4am) it is a woman, she tells me that they have been seeing each other for a few weeks and he travel to florida with her and is living with her sleeping with her etc... I am stunned, I do know what to say so I play it cool and make her think she can keep him I don't want him. He calls a few days later and I confront him with the info I have, I tell him if he wants to come back to be with me and the baby I will get him a ticket to come home. A week or two later he calls and wants to come home, so I do it (first mistake, right). So he comes back and I forgive his lies and deceit. He lives with me and all of a sudden he wants to go back to stay at his dad's house about 15 minutes away. He gave a good reason and so I was cool with it. But he didn't call for 3 1/2 weeks and I was like "what's going on?" I get my cell phone bill and becauseme and my sister her two children and my 4 year old daught went to Disney World and I left him with my cell so I could get him if I needed to. I check the bill an dhe has called FL quite a few times, I called every number in that phone and the FL number it was her this trick he left me for to go to FL. she tells me they got back together when he left my house, this time I am enraged. He has lied and cheated again. I call and call and finally he calls me back while I am on the phone with him I am drivivng to his house to confornt him. He has nothing to say, no answers what-so-ever. I sleep with him hell, i am pregnant and horny. I start seeing him again and now again he is being neglectful and not calling. He started a new job but that is no excuse not to pick up the phone. I am fed up which I should have been a while ago, but my mother liked him and never had one bad thing to say about him. I always sought her approval and I will never be able to get it from her so I think maybe she knew something in life that I didn't and maybe we belong together. We have so much histroy and aside from losing a boyfriend I am losing a friend. It hurts but I am having this man's child---I have known him for years and it just seems like destiny for us to be together. I will give birth to his first born son but if he doesn't get his shit together he will never see this child. He is Latino and I expected that they value family more so then my black men and it kills me to see that all men suck and I do not want tofeel that way about my son. I don't want to hate him like I hate my daughter's father. But he is pushing me to it. Any helpful advice?