Pregnancy Info HOME

Hi dew i have seen you on this forum alot to. I am SOO sorry for what you are going through.I understand about your problems in your pregnancy(i almost lost this one at 6 weeks) and misc. problems and as youv'e read problems with the father.I agree i don't regret my kids just the father! I was in school too barely working on my bachlors and had to temporarly drop(sorry for the spelling-i'm tired to).So thats what we are here for is to vent and find some people that can listen and give advice! I don't have any good advice but i am here. I believe to this forum has helped me. I mean my dad and sister try but they haven't gone trough being pregnant,cheated on and dumped all at the same time. So what state do you live in? Ya know on those maternity programs they have DOULAS that are by your side during labor maybe you should check into that? I thought about it to. I know its not much but at least you'll have someone there for sure. I will pray for your mom and that things get better for you. Life is something else!Well i know we are all on the net but feel free to write me as much as you want. The more support we all get is better!

I know exactly how you feel. The father of my child ran off. I can't get him to help me in the least bit. My parents are thieving flakes, whom I can not depend on. I have a few friends that I can call if I go into labor, but I'm scared they won't be available because of the impending holiday and my due date. My father is an alcoholic pot smoking loser. My mother says she can't help because she's having a "breakthrough". My mother also says she can't help because she "has her own life", as she put it. I know how you feel. All I can hope for at this point is to provide a better life for my child than the one that was provided for me. I don't want my child around my father or the father of my child. Both are addicted to drugs and are losers. I think with everything that has happened to me this experience has made me stronger. I rub my belly a lot and tell my daughter that she shouldn't worry so much because she comes from a very strong woman. I tell her that she'll be blessed with strength and courage. I can instill in her the values that I had to find on my own. This is one of the only lights at the end of this dark tunnel. I just pick myself up everyday, I dust myself off, and I try very hard to be strong. It has been working. I still cry, but not nearly as much. There is this strength that I've reached for, so that I can conquer this battle inside of myself. The father of my child believes he can walk back into our lives at any point, but he doesn't realize who I really am. This I can hold as my own astounding new truth. As women we are the life bringers. Men, as weak as they are, can only take life. The last time I saw my ex I told him, "You know nothing about life. I took that slimy disgusting white gunk that comes out of your penis and made it into another human being. I reincarnated parts of yourself into a new life, and for that you should be down on your knees worshipping me." I then had him hold out his hand and I spit on him. "Can you make life out of that?" I asked.

hey ladies , I am so sorry for what you have and are going through. I am here if you want to talk I have been through alot with my kids' dad and let me tell you everything from a-z so if at any time you want to talk e-mail me... Hottmomaof6@aol.com
good luck to you both....

trudy~
I just read your post and I can sympathize with you on the parent thing. Crazy as it seems I am kinda glad my parents have their "own" life because it goes to show that they dont care and I dont want my kids growing up to be around that or learning from it! Your right on telling your daughter dhe comes from a strong woman!
Where are you ladies from? I am from Oregon

I live in Virginia. I'm 3 minutes away from the district.

Thanks for all your kind words ladies. I'm trying to stay strong and think only of my baby, as hard and scary as it is, he's the only real good thing I got going now. I just wish he would come out!! Now that I'm workig through MY issues, I just feel ready to focus on someone else (my baby). someone thats actually worth my time and energy (not that I'm not worth the time and energy, but I need some positivity). If nothing else, I can spend the rest of my life trying to be a better mom than I had myself. anyway, I'm here for you all just as you have been here for me so don't hesitate to contact me at honeycarter@sbcglobal.net or right here on this site, I'm here everyday. By the way, I live in CT

What do you mean that he worries about his new girlfriend more? I cant believe that there are men out there that can act like that an look at themseIves in a mirror and not be disturbed. Im sorry that you have to go through this. What were you getting your degree in Im getting my BA this Jan. It sucks going to school and being pregnant. I live in CT too, where abouts I live n manchester.

Your welcome dew glad your feeling better today! Oh i live in TX.Yeah the men do care about the other women more then the kids. I know cuz my ex well he's proven that time and time again. Sad but how it is. Uggh my dad and i just got through putting bows on my daughters presents from us and other family members and i tell you my child is so spoiled!With two kids i am gonna have to add a second story just to store the toys and clothes! My grandpa spoils her the most and boy does she know it! Well hope you all have a good day.

Hi Beth, I live in New London. I was getting my MBA with a focus in Strategy and policies from UNH. I hope to go back this summer. good luck with your BA. By the way, I don't know how he looks in the mirror, I can't even look at him without wanting to kick him in the balls. To g, you sound like your going to have a happy holiday, or at least your kids will. I can't wait to spoil my son! In the beginning of my pregnancy, I said I wouldn't but now my condo is filled to the ceiling with his stuff, so I think I lied. Anyway, I have to lie down (I have the flu) so I hope to hear from you ladies soon, thanks again.

Hope you feel better dew. Well i'm trying to be chipper and as long as i dont let my mind wander i'm ok. Take care all.

good morning ladies! how are you doing? I am concerned that's all. What is new today? Not much here except... baby has dropped. Well please let me know how you all are doing.

To hottmomaof6- Wow how far along are you? That was nice to ask how everybody was. I'm ok just seems like everynite i dream of my ex usually about him cheating. But i am ok just keeping busy with my lil girl wrapping last minute presents and playing! Well i hope you all are doing well and smiling! Take care!

to g~
I am around 32-33 weeks. Always confused on that. But I am due on Feb.13. Today he is not moving or atleast not yet. Maybe he's getting ready!! Hope he waits!! I have to finish my shopping. Haven't really had the energy but all is good.I hope you ladies all have a wonderful holiday season and a merry christmas. As we have all been blessed with our children!!! I will talk to you later. Keep in touch... Like I said if you want to e-mail me you can... hottmomaof6@aol.com

To hottmomaof6- Wow sounds like he does want to come out! Iam only 24 weeks and it's also a boy. Whoa i almost lost him at 6 weeks and now he's kicking letting me know he's still here! How time flies. I do have to get some candy for my dad and gramps but other than that -done! Thanks i will keep in touch.

dew,
i am really so sorry to hear about what you are going through. I feel for you about your mother, I was addicted to drugs for most of my adolescence and into my late teens,,,, and i was with a man who was as well. so i know how it is for both sides....to wonder when you will get the call saying theyre dead...and to be the one who is controlled by something that robs you of a life. I am okay now and 3 months along in my pregnancy. In regards to your mother, I am no therapist, but from my experience all you can do is love her and hope she is okay. Pray, even if you dont believe,,,, and in my case, i had to detach from the person who was the drug user in my life,,,as painful as it was. You are so strong to have dealt with these situations in your life....so it seems to me that you will be just fine. I know it sucks though....my family had disowned me wehn they found out im pregnant,,,, i have been clean for years and they still think i am incapable of doing anything right. Meanwhile......the father of the child has left me and said "its not his"......gee...thats original. I know your lonliness and your pain. I too, have no one. But you know what.......you do have one person right there every minute of everyday.....and that is your baby. You know what i do to help myself through hard times.....i have started a journal where i write to my baby. I write all of the things i want to say....and i dont feel so alone. You will make it through....... keep your head up.

To Deiyss, I have a journal too. I started it the day I found out I was pregnant. I don't tell him (my baby) about the things I've gone through, but I talk to him about the lessons I've learned having gone through such bad things in my life. I want you to know that your very strong for giving up drugs and I admire you for that. I've studied addiction my entire life (or since I could read) and I followed my mother through her many attempts to quit. I know recovery requires many changes and they have to be done for yourself as opposed to doing it for another person (even your child). My mother's problem is that she never feels she is worth it, I'm not sure if she ever will. I am sure of the fact that I'm her daughter and I will love her forever. I just can't stand and watch her kill herself, and I refuse to let my son watch. I think about the discussion I will have to have with him some day, when he starts to notice that his nana is different than other nanas. It hurts to think that I will have to explain to him what crack is, and what it can do to a person. I know I won't be able to wait until he's 13 or even 15, I'll have to tell him this at a very young age, I will have to make him understand that there is nothing we can do about it, except love her and pray for her. I don't want him to be consumed with hatred and anger toward her like I did until I was 18. WOW!!! this makes my problems with his father sound easy! Anyway, I will have to teach and prepare my son for the uglyness of this world, and let him know that I will be his soft place to fall. I will also have to be sure he sees the beauty of the world through the chaos, and be his protector. I'm sure you know what I mean. It's good to know that our struggles were not in vane. We can use them to be better mothers and to make our kids stronger than we were. I wish you the best, and hope to keep in touch. Take care.