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Am I Just Really Lucky... My 20 Month Old Doesn't Act Up.

7 posts on this thread and the last post was on April 16th, 2008 12:40 PM
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krc - April 10th, 2008 12:03 PM
[Original Post]

i must be really lucky because I have never had to really discipline my 20 month old. He doesn't throw tantrums or act up. I've NEVER had to even consider time out or stuff like that. He basically just laughs and plays all day. Of course I have to tell him " no " for things but other than that it's been a picnic so far. He is my only child as well. Does anyone else have a real easy time with their kid(s)? Of course a childs personality makes all the difference and i'm sure my next kid could be the complete opposite! But when your little one acts up.. what is it they're doing that you have "discipline" them when there 2 or younger? I'm only asking because my son doesn't seem to do anything yet.


mjvdec01 - April 10th, 2008 12:50 PM

My daughter is 26 months old and really doesn't act up either. We do occasionally use a 'time-out', but that is only maybe once a month, if that. She is a doll when we take her out of the house and that is great because every day she asks to go "bye-bye". I think it has a lot to do with personality, I also think it has something to do with parenting style. I believe that if you truly treat your kids with respect that you will get the same in return. My daughter is given a lot of choices and I actually listen to what she has to say, and respond. I don't yell, or spank, or man handle... I don't need to. Getting down on her level and saying, "no", in an authoritative voice is all it takes. Madalyn is on her way to 2 and a half and the 'terrible twos' are no where to be seen. Ofcourse, this is my child, and I am in no way saying that there aren't cases where the parents aren't doing everything 'right' and the child still isn't responding, but this is our situation. Kids will have their moments, but it is all in how you handle it.


mjvdec01 - April 10th, 2008 12:54 PM

correction, it should read ..."where the parents ARE doing everything..."


K - April 10th, 2008 3:01 PM

You better knock on wood somewhere!! You might be saying that too soon. I too had a perfect little angel at 20 mths. She was very outgoing and strong willed, but never really threw tantrums or acted up. Then she actually turned 2. Within a week, she started having some raging tantrums at home (luckily she is still usually on good behavior when out). We never know what might bring on a tantrum or when. More often than not, it is over not putting the right outfit or pajamas on her- which she usually does not let you know until you are pulling it over her head and she starts screaming and crying. Other examples are, if she asks for milk and I get it for her and hand it to her, she might start crying and throwing a fit because she wanted to get her cup out of the refrigerator herself, or she might start throwing a fit because she wanted Daddy to get it for her and not Mommy. She also throws fits if she wants to go somewhere or do something and we say no or on the way home in the car if she did not want to leave somewhere. It's usually silly little stuff- really she is just asserting her opinions and preferences (of which she has many) and independence. Most of the time, she is still a happy good tempered kid, but she has her moments. I think she is still too young for a formal time out, plus she is only doing it because she just doesn't understand why she can't always get what she wants yet. We usually just calmly tell her why things are they way they are and that we understand that she is mad and then ignore the fit until she stops (thankfully, they are usually short). Like Mjv, we do not spank, and we try to remain calm and not yell. Mjv you are very lucky!



in the woods - April 10th, 2008 8:07 PM

Agree with the ladies - enjoy!! it as much as possible now. My dd was good until she had her 2nd bday. Then she caused a lot of grief, up to 1 week to her 3rd birthday, at which point she turned into an angel. My son is a sweety, but he acts up in public places still (at 3y 3mo) - I expect him to have his terrible twos till he's 4 yo. Then there's the dynamics of two kids - one starts running in a restaurant, the other joins in...


Justine1 - April 15th, 2008 6:47 AM

I also have very good children like you. I've got a 15 month old DS and a 2 year old DD and they are both good. Several people told me as my first was a little angel I'ld have trouble with the second but he's really good too. Have to say No firmly but thats about it. There's a bit of sibling rivalry and occasionally eldest will hit the youngest but I just tell my DD (the eldest) she mustn't do that as it makes her brother sad and she needs to give him a cuddle to make him happy again and she'll give him a cuddle. Last DD hit DS as he was trying to steal her cake I told her No you don't hit DS give him a cuddle. So she gave him a cuddle then she gave her brother all her cake and said now my brother is very happy and he was!.


J.J. - April 16th, 2008 12:37 PM

I think personality and parenting do go a long way. Experts say that alot of what you see before 18 months of age reflects overall personality. BUT, it's natural for kids to reach an age where they are easily frustrated -- they suddenly realize they have an opinion, that they prefer something (be it french fries, a tv show, staying at the park opposed to going home) and they will try to assert their desires. So, while you may successfully dodge the terrible two's, realize that ALOT of kids experience the terrible three's instead..... According to my mom, i was a perfect 2, but was difficult at 3, and i've heard similar tales.... I can say my 2 1/2 yr old is relatively easy but not saintly. He does and will throw temper tantrums.....most of which i ignore or laugh at. Exhaustion definitely plays a role in his reaction. So, bottom line, enjoy the calm but realize there may be a storm on the horizon.


J.J. - April 16th, 2008 12:40 PM

As for your question about disciplining: at 2, i could tell my son "don't touch," and he'd honor my request. Now, he will sometimes test....touching whatever is forbidden, while looking back at me. I hate to say that we all become our parents but, i've caught myself saying, "don't make me get up out of my chair..." i've also used, "I'm going to count to 5...." So it's not like i'm having to spank him or put him in time out, but sometimes he will test my authority.