17 And Trying

41 Replies
natalie - July 18

Grow up!!! You are a little to young to start a family....I think you need to relax and enjoy your own chilhood...

 

PK - July 18

To :) - First of all I want to say that I am so super excited for you. I hope everything is just as you always dreamed. Then I want to say forget about people who don't support you, and surround yourself with people who love you and DO support you. Although to the average 17 yr old I would say wait, I think sometimes maturity and circ_mstances in life can count for a whole lot. I made decisions about my life when I was about 18 years old, ones that didn't make sense to anyone and I was criticized by everyone for but I followed my heart and what I thought God wanted me to do, and its amazing because all of the things God had promised me have come to pa__s, even though the path that led to those promises didn't look like it should have to the world. I gave up a 7,000 dollar a semester scholarship to the college that I had always dreamt of to stay home and help take care of my crippling mother and the niece that my brother and sister in law were unable to take care of do to circustances in life. I decided I had to grow up when I was about your age, and you know what, I haven't regretted it for a minute. Things, education, money, they are all important, but they're not what really matters. I doubt I will ever look back on life and wish I had gone to that college, but I do think if I would have gone, that I would look back and wish I hadn't have missed out on the last few months of my father's life, missed out on my niece who is my best friend and my favorite person in the world. Anyways, I know I am rambling but I just want you to know I support you, I say SOME people can handle things despite their age. And if there ever are days where you feel like you missed out on youth, look at that baby and you'll remember it was all worth it. All it takes for me is one glance and my niece Gracie!

 

Jenniferw - July 18

OK...first of all, the only thing you should be saving money for is college. That's the most ridiculous thing I've every heard trying to get pregnant at 17!! I'm 30 and preganant with my first baby, married, both me and my husband have good jobs. And we're still concerned about the money factor! Do you think your mom should automatically keep it and give you money. Because I guarantee the little amount you have saved might cut it for a month...give me a break! Why do you say you NEED to do it? I've had a lot of 'female' problems, and am having a totally healthy pregnancy. Do you plan on going to college? If not, how do you expect to have a good enough job to send your kid to college one day? And please don't tell me you're going to depend on some guy to help you. You need to learn to be strong, independent woman before thinking about starting a family. Get a degree, a good job, then think about it. Seriously, you have no idea how much babies cost (even though I'm sure you think you do), not to mention the emotional maturity it takes that NO 17 year old has (no matter how mature you seem). Believe me, there are plenty of chances to have a child at 30, and to me, it's better to wait. Just think, you'll have already experienced so much, and will have a much higher maturity level, more patience and much more stability to raise a child in the type of environment that he/she deserves to have. Please WAIT!!!!! There is plenty of time to have babies and have a fulfilling life...be what you are right now - a teenager.

 

JenniferW - July 18

And PK...I agree that money and education isnt' ALL that matters, but it's so important in raising a baby and being able to give her what she needs. Pampers don't come from love! Good for you that you've helped your family so much, but it's different when it's your neice part-time that you're taking care of, or your own baby that you'll have forever. Money isn't everything, but there's no way that I could provide for my baby as well as I could on a high school diploma. You're obviously still young or you'd recognize that.

 

PK - July 18

Jennifer W. First of all who the c___p said I take care of my niece part time, lets put it this way, my brother hasn't even ever seen her okay. Second, I make dang good money, drive a brand spanking new car, and have health, dental and life insurance, plus a 401k plan and get annual raises every year, not to mention my job offer a 100% tuition reimbursment plan for any field you choose. I probably am better off than you right now, and I haven't been to college YET- Thirdly if you remember correctly I said that stuff is important, but IT isn't what matters and I will believe that till the day I die, my mother raise three kids making under the poverty level, without government a__sistance and I never once felt poor growing up, so you know maybe its you who is young. I was simply letting this WOMAN :) know that not everyone's path is so clear and precise that they can map it out and it happens in the perfect little fantasy life way, but if you trust in God and do what you know is right for you, it will be okay, I believe that is true. So Jennifer, I am happy for you that your life has been so wonderful and that you have always made the perfect choices so that you can jugde other people on the choices they make but you know there are some of us in this world who say go for it, live it up, this is the only life we get. Besides no body is EVER ready for a baby really, I have heard people who had their first child at 16 say it was hard, and I have heard people 35+ say they still didn't feel ready. Let God be the judge of who's ready to have a child, and in the mean time, understand that you don't understand everyone and what they have been through so sometimes it's okay to feel compa__sion and still dissagree without biting their head off!

 

Jamie - July 19

Jennifer, how can you be so judgemental and convinced that your way is the right way? Like PK, I made a lot of unconventional choices, and I am now better off than my peers who made the more "appropriate and mature" choices. I chose NOT to go to college after high school - never even bothered to apply! Instead, I worked full-time, until I was 21, at which time, I enlisted in the military - that was a spur of the moment decision with no apparent basis in anything remotely approaching logical reasoning. I gave up a job where I made $35,000 a year, with benefits, to serve a government I hate in a war I don't believe in. While in training for the military, one tiny little thing happened, that made everything perfectly crystal clear to me - I met my husband; I married him when I had known him for a total of 6 weeks. No one from his family, or mine, attended the wedding - once again, I did something unconventional, and my parents did NOT support my choice. We spent the first 3 months of our marriage on separate continents (him in the U.S., me in Europe). Within 2 weeks of him joining me in Europe, I became pregnant - but we still didn't live together for another 4 months after that. We've now been married just over a year, and I'm ready to deliver our little girl pretty much any day - I've never been happier. We each have a car, year 2003 or newer, both of which are COMPLETLEY paid for! We have our own apartment, have managed to save nearly $10,000, and still get to travel Europe on the weekends. So, tell me, o wise one - how are your "conventional" choices better than mine????

 

:) - July 21

jenifer, your a b___h plain and ture, you dont look at what i write and judge me saying im not mature enough. my mother is going to support me so that i can have a family which she knows i will want. it isnt the female problems that most women get and some can have healthy pregnancy through. MY KIDNEYS ARE FAILING!!! GET THAT, it will soon be so unsafe for me to carry a baby coz of the strain my kidneys would be under. READ!!!!! ok, im getting p__sed off with you all coming and judging me. i can do it and i dont need you to tell me other wise. i already have alot of the things my baby will need, and i am quite capable with my fiance to provide my baby with a whole lot more. dont think for one second your opionion matters. i want support from people who care. you wouldnt know how heart breaking it is o be told that your kidneys are failing and if i ever want children of my own i have to have them before i get so bad that it could cause death from renal failure. my family are more supporti9ve than you probably imagine so leave off and grow up. for a thirty year old you only look at things from your perspective not everyone elses. its a quality alot of people (obviously not all) seem to develop in adult life

 

Chrissy - July 22

I WOULD LIKE TO SAY SOMETHING HERE. EVERYONE WHO IS BAD-MOUTHING THIS YOUNG GIRL SHOULD MIND THEIR BUSINESS. YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES BY SAYING SHES STUPID AND SHE DOESNT KNOW ANYTHING AND THAT SHES CRAZY...SHES NOT SICK IN THE HEAD...HER ONLY OPTION IS TO HAVE A CHILD NOW. I DONT SEE IT AS WEIRD. HER DOCTOR TOLD HER SHE WONT BE FERTILE AFTER A CERTAIN AGE, SHE THEN TOLD HIM/HER BUT I WANT CHILDREN AND THEN HER DOCTOR SAID I KNOW YOURE YOUNG BUT YOU BETTER HAVE A CHILD NOW. AND THATS WHAT SHES DOING. NOT HARD TO BELIEVE. FIRST OF ALL I DUNNO WHERE ALL YOU ARE FROM BUT IM FROM AMERICA AND THINGS ARE CHANGING HERE. PEOPLE DONT HAVE s_x ONLY IF THEYRE MARRIED, THEY DONT HAVE BABIES ONLY IF THEYRE MARRIED. YES GRANTED, MOST YOUNG GURLS HAVING BABIES DONT KNOW WHAT THEYRE DOING BUT THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO KNOW WHAT THEYRE DOING. SO PLEASE STOP PUTTING HER DOWN AND CONGRADULATE HER. AND SHES RIGHT: YOURE DAMN LUCKY YOU CAN HAVE CHILDREN! NOTHING IS DEPRIVING YOU FROM THAT. I HAVE TROUBLE CONCIEVING SO I KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE. SO STOP BEING JUDGEMENTAL AND GO ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS

 

Heather - July 22

Hey I just wanted to say Congrats :) i'm so glad things are working out for you the way you hoped. Don't listen to these other people putting you down girl. you can do this just as well as a 30 year old. sounds like to me they need to grow up. i have posted here before but it's been a few months and i was just reading up and saw that you are pregnant :) I will be 20 in 2 months and my little girl will be 1 in 2 months i am married but he's deployed so other than money i still do it on my own. and girl this has been the happiest year of my life other than my husband being gone. he is so thrilled that he's coming home to join his family in jan. so don't mind these people who dont' want to support you. and another thing school isnt' going anywhere. i know people who have raised children and are now going back to school for themselves. me and my husband are starting back to school next year. there is always online school. which is great for stay at home mom's. good luck with everything girl. i wish you the best and may God bless you .

 

Kallia - July 26

I think it is your decision to have a baby at age 17. If you are with someone you love and can help you take care of it go for it. I an 17 years old and might be pregnant. At 1st i wanted one and know im not so sure im really ready for the responsibility anymore. i love my boyfriend to death and he is here for me no matter what happend. If you and your boyfriend are ready then go for it. babys are so much fun but its not like babysitting when its your kid you cant give them back. its yours and its given back to you when they are being brats.

 

sheena - July 26

I say go with your heart.I got pregnant when i was 17 but i had a miscarriage because i got so scard.I say if you can wait please do if not go for it,i think you should wait to finish school.Wait just 2 or 3 years.

 

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