Try For A Baby At 48

37 Replies
CyndiG - May 6

I know this isn't the popular response, but, my grandmother and my mother were pregnant at the same time. I have an aunt and uncle that are 2 years older and the same age as me respectively. My grandmother pa__sed away 4 years ago, leaving her two youngest children at 29 and 31 motherless. My uncle literally had to be dragged off of her casket. It was so sad! I know it's hard to think of death, but it will inevitably happen. I also know that 29 and 31 is old enough to be self sufficient, but we always need our mommies. That's just one perspective that I have personal experience with. Good Luck with your decision!

 

frankschick2001 - May 14

I think at 48, I would worry too. I would never tell you not to do it, but for me, I wouldn't try to get pregnant at 48. The risks ARE real. Adoption is an alternative. Although again, I do not know how easy it would be to adopt at 48. Perhaps if you were willing to adopt an older child, it would be easier?

 

billsgirl - May 19

i completely agree with cindi- it is sad to think about, but it would be so hard to bury a parent at a young age.sorry

 

hawaiiangel81 - July 20

I don't see anything wrong with you having a baby at 48 i am the daughter of older parents. I was loved and they were there for me and i loved having my neices and nephews who are my age.

 

littlebaby2 - December 5

getting prego at 48 is like winning the lotto...good luck!

 

BeckyBunny - December 6

I think that the most you have to worry about at this age is how your children will feel. Have you discussed it with them to get their opinion? Surely their opinions are worth more than the opinions of a bunch of strangers. You have obviously given this a lot of thought. Personally I would say that if you wholeheartedly want a child, and your husband feels the same, and your children do not object - go for it. You are obviously a healthy person and are probably capable of bearing another child. My Grandmother had 12 kids, the last at age 42 - she was pregnant at the same time as her oldest daughter. My uncle Kevin, Grandma's youngest, and my cousin Rachelle are only a couple months apart in age. As far as I know, my Aunt never had any problems being pregnant at the same time as her mother. I must tell you also, that Kevin, while he does function perfectly fine in society, is not retarded or deformed or anything - he is just a tad bit slow, and he tends to think like a child. There are always risks, you just have to get with a good doctor who will work with you, and decide: do the benefits outweigh the risks? I wish you all the best.

 

LN030905 - December 10

If you want a child then you should go for it!! It does help your chances that your husband is younger..as long as he is also healthy. If God allows you to get pregnant, then your child will be a blessing to you and your family. If you do want this, of course, I would suggest ttc right away! Maybe go ahead and visit with a DR just to make sure everything is okay so you dont waste any time! Good Luck!

 

3_babies_at_41 - January 30

Wow woman, you really got guts!!! And I thought I was cookoo (smile) for wanting another baby at almost 42. I too have 3 children; however, mine are ages 3, 2, & 1. My opinion, go for it ---- because if you don't, you may end up regretting it; when it is TRULY too late.

 

^lucy^ - February 4

my mom's friend had her last baby around 3 months ago and she's 45... she has 2 boys from a previous marriage who are 21 and 16 and has 2 girls 6 and 4 from her current marriage.. she wanted a boy from her curent husband and decided to give it a try.. she had fears just like u did but had faith that what God is planning then she will get. she has an adorable baby girl who is so healthy and cute.. her preganancy was easy and normal and her delivery wad the easiest among all she said.. no tears nothing cz its her 5th child and she's so happy that she tried and never kept saying I WISH.. talk to ur doctor and hope things will go right for u and ur husband..its fun to be pregnant after all those years :) GL xx

 

Bumblebee - February 23

jeanniek - How wonderful that you feel young at heart and want to share that with your and your wonderful husband's baby! The stats are just that - numbers in a pool of unknown realities and infinite possibilities. Along with your good diet and young heart and supportive family, I wish you the faith to follow your happiness. Down's or healthy baby, it will all be a family filled with life and love... and either way, will be a lifestyle change along a wonderful adventurous path. The down's or other challenged kids I have met and played with - have always completely and wholly sucked me into their world of amazing sweet laughter and unique gifts..... and have allowed me a peek into a world I cherish. I wish you all the best with the decision. :)

 

Lola128 - February 24

Hi Jeanniek, while I understand your desire to have a baby, I think you should maybe reconsider for your child's sake. Lets say you got pregnant right away, you would be 49 when the child is born. You'd be 64 when your child got into high school. About 69 at high school graduation. While you sound as though you lead a pretty healthy lifestyle, risk factors to your own health will grow at an exponential rate. Will you honestly have the energy required to be a fun, energetic parent to a young child, full time? What about the very real risk for that child of losing a parent at possibly a young age? I was in my 20's when my mother pa__sed and it was horrendous, though I was an adult, no one should lose a parent that young. In your situation that could be a very real possibility for your child. I truly don't mean to be insensitive or offensive, I do understand that your motivations are altruistic, but I think that they may be a little bit short- sighted. Perhaps you should instead encourage your new husband to have a closer relationship with his 3 year old, one that you may be able to be a part of. After all, a new baby should not, and could not be a replacement for his existing child. I hope that I haven't been thoughtless or harsh, but for a moment, think about this baby you want to have...think about how much you would love it, and how much it would love you, would you really be o.k with setting that child up, from birth, with the very real possibility of only knowing you for 25 years or so? That child's life might only be just starting then, should they have to watch as yours is winding to a close? Again, I do truly wish you all the best in whatever your decision is, I do caution you to think it over deeply, even the unpleasant parts nobody wants to think about.

 

Cat24 - March 26

i think this is a difficult one because whilst every woman has the right to have a baby unfortunately facts of life, health issues and circ_mstances mean that such decisions need to be deeply thought into. i think i would have more sympathy for jeanniek if she didnt have any kids at all and was desperate for a baby with the love of her life. i also disagree with roby who tried making this into an ageism issue. to me its nothing to do with being 'anti women in their 40's' its to do with the bare facts of life, the risks, the impact on her other children and how long she will live to see this baby grow up, get married, have kids of his/her own. nobody can predict these things but science has told us that the liklihood at a later stages in life is higher. i agree with what americanreject said about looking forward to grandchildren now, enjoy watching your own children do the whole pregnancy, birth and motherhood thing. i do think it is a selfish thing to inflict on a baby because it seems like its something she wants to do because she has a new fella in her life, wants to please him etc. but then he also has a child, so its not like either of them would end up 'missing out' on what its like to bring a child into the world. i honestly think sometimes we should appreciate and be happy with what we have, rather than thinking 'what do i want next' and forgetting all the risks and implications it will have on everyone else.

 

SuserK - January 12

Your story sounds much like my own..and I am going to be 47 this year. My 48 y/o fiance' and I talk about having children together and it's something we want, but the fear of being able to conceive and having a healthy child is, of course, there. I have 3 grown son's from a previous marriage (19, 24, 26). My fiance' has never been married, never had any children, but he really wants to try. I guess my question for you is - how did things turn out for you? Good, I hope.

 

littlebaby2 - January 12

if you have the money and can get help like a nanny...go for it. if you struggle with money skip it.

 

jeanniek - January 13

Just thought I'd update. I have just left the decision in God's hands really. I feel a lot less nervous about the whole thing now. If we are meant to have a child naturally we will, God willing. I know a lot of people have commented on health etc. but I am at least twice as healthy as a good number of thirty year olds I come across. My lifestyle is natural and healthy. So, time will tell I suppose. In the meantime, we have started the adoption process, which is a very lengthy one in itself - again age may be a factor and we are not ensured success - but we have a lot to offer and all we can do is offer and if we are successful it will be wonderful. Good luck to all you ladies out there and thanks for the support.

 

rnangel48 - January 30

I am having these same thoughts and urges. I am 48 met someone 15 yrs younger than me. Would love to give him a child but those risks are scarey! I also am a nurse and have 2 grown children. He has none and wants one of his own!!

 

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