Are M C Really Common Scared

17 Replies
margie - January 12

i came on here originally just to find some answers to some symptoms i was having (brown discharge for about a week, cramps, backpain...) and since reading a lot of the posts on here i have been a nervous wreck and feel like i cant even be happy about this pregnancy as much anymore cause it seems like just about everyone on here has had at least one m/c.....is it really that common or did you ladies come on here to get support because you have had previous problems with your pregnancies? please help because i dont know why im so scared but this is my first pregnancy and me and the father want this baby more than anything and im driving him crazy crying everyday about it cause i just see so many people on the internet who have lost their babies and i think i would probably not be able to handle it at all...i lost both my parents last year and went through a lot with that before it happened that a really long horribly painful story....but anyways, i just wondering should i worry? :( please help!

 

stefkay - January 12

Hi margie, Oh...I know how you feel and please don't get upset. I've been a basket case a lot of my pregnancy so far for this very reason and it's not good for you and the baby. I can't remember off the top of my head the exact statistics on miscarriage, but it is not "common" as in, the odd ARE in YOUR FAVOR for a healthy pregnancy. The first 12 weeks are the most critical time and when m/c typically occurs. Now, my dr. told me specifically NOT to go on the internet because it is rather one-sided towards the "negative". I want to be excited with my pregnancy, but I myself have had more than one miscarriage. That is probably why I came online and that is probably why many of us do. If I didn't have a worry in the world, I probably wouldn't have come online and found this place. It is not that story for everyone, but my dr. pointed out that is probably why you hear so many miscarriage stories because women are seeking support and want to vent their worries. I agree, that it often seems like everyone here has had one and it's not the case in the general population :-) Feel free to vent here...Good luck!!!

 

krnj - January 12

Hi did you speak with your dr about the brown discharge & cramps? I'm sure you're fine but you may want to mention it just to be safe.Try not to read too much on the internet about m/c like Stefkay said. I'm so sorry to hear about your parents! How many weeks are you?

 

margie - January 12

stefkay...thank you so much for the reasurance!! i do understand why women who have had m/c come here for support because that would make it so much more scary...im truly so sorry to hear about your previous losses and sometimes reading the stories feel like i could shed a tear for every woman who has suffered...but i will admit i am a very nervous and anxious person and tend to think the worse and i suppose i must find a way to be the most positive i can regardless of that thought that 'anything can happen' because 'anything' isn't always bad, sometimes its really good...i appreciate your rea__surance so much..i will pray that you will make it through this one and that lil peanut inside of you is growing healthy and strong (lil peanut is nickname i have for mine) i think after my first doc visit monday i'll feel better...i've already gone to the ER for pains and cramps i had last sunday and should feel better knowing they saw the cervix closed, at least thats a good sign so far! thanks again :)

 

margie - January 12

krnj...i called but could only talk to his a__sistance and she didn't seem too concerned, i did go to the ER because i had a pain on my side that was really bothering me a lot, i thought perhaps a kidney infection but it wasnt...they did a pelvic exam and saw the cervix was closed but no u/s or anything because they said i would be too early. i think thats what made me so nervous and worried at first was that spotting lasted for a week, it has since stopped as well as the side pain...i have a dr appt on monday so i'll get to find out how everything is going then...i am only about 6 weeks...will be 6 weeks from my last period tomorrow anyways. im excited but im sure its also normal to be nervous, i think if not for that spotting and cramps i wouldnt have freaked out so badly

 

kimberly - January 12

Worrying will do no good and is the last thing you need to do! It is true that 15% of all pregnancies will end in miscarriage. But spotting with no cramps or heavy bleeding is not considered abnormal. It could be a sign of threatened miscarriage but this doesn't mean you will miscarry. I would just put your feet up as often as you can and maybe see if you can get in for a early ultrasound, and as I said do not stress about the unknown.

 

ROBYN - January 12

Margie you are more than likely fine its old blood thats coming out its normal. Just try and relax I am only 9 weeks pregnant and on complete bedrest I had blood pouring out of me on New Years while I was at work around midnite I was totally freaking out we did IVF I met with my IVF doctor and I have a hematoma thats bleeding out so all I do is bleed its awful I am in the doctors office every few days for u/s. My baby is completely fine thank God but I have had a ton of scare over the past week and a half I have never had a m/c and thought for sure this was it. But I did have cramping like a period, lower back and lots and lots of blood. If your doctor isnt concerned your fine. If its starts turning red, clotting with tissue or cramping go to the hospital or your doctor immediately. Your fine enjoy your pregnancy.

 

DownbutnotOUT - January 12

Hey margie I was just reading your post and it sounds almost like a miscarriage due to the brown spotting(old blood) cramps and backpain to be honest those are really bad signs. On the plus side they have stopped which is excellent if it was a m/c I do believe your body would begin to bleed heavier, clots, and tissue would pa__s. I put up my feet and relax as much as I could and try not to worry too much as the worst has pa__sed. i had a missed miscarrige and the bleeding only got worse it never stopped, also miscarriages are believed to be about 20-25% it all depends on the dr, I had 1 dr tell me 50/50 chance. Good luck to you and im sure your u/s will show a healthy little peanut with a strong heart beat.

 

stefkay - January 13

The only site my dr. really mentioned as being "approved" as reliable for me to look on (ha ha) was mayoclinic DOT com. Look there under miscarriage and this is really informative. The percentage is 15, not 25, and defintely not 50. I've never heard that anywhere and I'd be wary of a dr. that tells you that. Also, brown spotting doesn't signal a miscarriage, red blood does. I understand that any spotting should be reported to your doctor so he/she can check you out as some miscarriages start out as brown spotting, but a lot of women here have had it and are totally fine (hence the "old blood"--that's a GOOD sign). Sorry, most of us just don't need to be more freaked out then we already are...

 

jen327 - January 13

Margie, I am so sorry hun. Try and relax, it is probbaly not a m/c. I never had one so I dont k now what it is like. I had Bright Red bleeding at 6 weeks and cramps. Went to the ER but it was not a m/c. Bleeding occurs in 30% of women and many of them go on to have healthy pregnanies. I came onto this site just to have comfort. I was going through so many things and did not know what was normal and what was not. I find myself having a good group of women who I feel a connection to because we are all pregnant. Some of us are more scared then others, but we are all supporting. I know I saw a forum for September mommies you may want to check out. I limit my research to this site only and Discovery Health channel. I would say the percentage of women who are on here that have had previous m/c's is higher because many women who have uneventful pregnancies never get on a site like this and say "Hi everything is fine" but some do. Had I not have bleeding I may never had found ths site and that would have been unfortunate for me. Anyway, try and relax, like Robyn said, brown blood is just old blood. So that means you are not activally bleeding. Find a good OB and be honest about all your concerns. Good luck.

 

kerryv - January 13

the statistics are 1 in 4. though many women have miscarriages before they even know they are pregnant and have for years, that is why testing so early isnt the best idea. that is also why the docs wont see you until 10-12 weeks pa__sed you lmp. take care and try to relax, and dont read too much on the internet, if you do make sure to be prepared to get really scared! the internet has great information but sometimes too much:)

 

DownbutnotOUT - January 13

stefkay its interesting how you omitted information I went to that website and it quotes "Miscarriage occurs in 15 percent to 20 percent of known pregnancies, most often during the first 12 weeks." I am not trying to freak anyone out but offer advice to the best of my knowledge and I feel by someone letting her know that yes she had symptons of a m/c everything seems good now. Also when I had my chemical pregnancy I started spotting brown blood for like 6 days before I completly lost the fetus so I do know from personal experience it can indicate a m/c. I would appreciate you to tell people the facts for the questions they ask and offer support instead of omitting information because YOU feel it freaks people out, well than they shouldnt have threads that ask people these questins. I wish you the best of luck margie

 

stefkay - January 13

Wow, sorry! I sure didn't mean to come across negatively to you Downbutnotout, but by your post you seem to have taken it that way. This is what I read on Mayo clinic under "Understanding Miscarriage"...obviously it says two different things on that website. I realize too that it says it (the percentage) can be higher, so I apologize for any misinformation. I copy/pasted from site as follows: What is a miscarriage? Miscarriage is the loss of a pregnancy without obvious cause before the 20th week. About 15 percent of known pregnancies end in miscarriage, according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG). But the actual number is probably much higher because many miscarriages occur so early in pregnancy that a woman doesn't even know she's pregnant. Most miscarriages occur before the 12th week of pregnancy. Signs and symptoms include: * Vaginal spotting or bleeding * Pain or cramping in your abdomen or lower back * Fluid or tissue pa__sing from your v____a Keep in mind that spotting or bleeding in early pregnancy is fairly common. In most cases, women who experience light bleeding in the first trimester go on to have successful pregnancies. Sometimes even heavier bleeding doesn't result in miscarriage. As it was explained to me is that the percentage CAN be higher due to the very early m/c, but those are the ones that usually happen very quickly and before 6 weeks or so. I've had 2 chemical pregnancies myself and never even made it to a first dr.'s visit with those. Again, sorry for trying to help...

 

DownbutnotOUT - January 14

I should apologize as well i was having a total pregnancy day and was being bit** to everyone I know you were just trying to help as well. once again sorry for being like that it was uncalled for

 

paulsgirl - January 14

im 17 and pregnant now and have had one m / c the thing is they are common i think every one has at least one unless ur extramly lucki . the thing about them is not to get upset because is just mother natures way of making sure out of all the children ur going to have u will have the best ones stress less it just gettin rid of imperfections

 

stefkay - January 14

No problem, Down :-) I know exactly how you feel...I have to apologize to friends and family on a daily basis when I get the "crazies"...LOL, it's getting old and I have so much further to go :-O

 

fara - January 15

hi margie..think positively.i noe how hard it is..but if u take care,u get past the 12 week mark n each week u pa__s miscarriage risk drops tremedously.ur baby needs u to b happi n not sad..altho alot of women have misc,even more women do not,they go on to have healthy babies..dont wori..u have our support.

 

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