Healing After Miscarriage

7 Replies
jenn - November 9

I lost my first pregnancy this weekend. I had earlier posted about my "miracle" in seeing the baby's heart beat at 8 weeks even though there was little hope. Turns out the pregnancy wasn't a healthy one afterall. Luckily, the natural miscarriage was quick (6hrs), painful, and complete. No D&C was needed (small miracle I guess). But now I'm wondering about what I can do to heal as fast as possible. My OB said that it can take anywhere from 4 to 8 weeks for my body to heal & to begin a new cycle. I want to heal quickly and try again, so this pain and loss can be replaced by a new excitement. Does anyone have any advice about what I should eat ?? should I do my regular exercise ? should I drink lots of water ? should I take some type of vitamin supplements ? I need a new focus ladies. I've spent three days in bed crying - I want this mourning period to turn into something positive. I need something other than my sadness to focus on. Any advice from those who have been here before ??

 

Shan - November 9

I know your pain!! I had 3 miscarriages in the past yr. The Dr. said is was just bad luck.....That's hard to swallow when you feel like its your fault or something is wrong with you. I had several tests after each, and nothing seems to be wrong w/me. Now I am currently going on 8 wks. Fingers crossed....I was put on progesterone to help hold the pregnancy, and still taking it. Jenn.. You need to be patient w/yourself and let your body heal. It will be the best odds for when you try again. I think you should keep taking vitamins, they say it helps get your body ready for the next time you try and conceive. Good luck w/ everything and keep you head up...

 

m - November 11

Jenn, I am soooo sorry for your loss. I, too recently suffered a mc. It was my second one. I had one in early September, and stayed home from work for 3 days just crying. It's completely devastating, and even though friends/family try to be comforting, nobody knows what you're going through. It helps to talk to people who have been through it. Anyway, I lost that baby. Well, 3 weeks later, I ovulated (I was using test strips), I got impatient and we went ahead and tried w/out waiting a full cycle. When I found out I was pregnant again, we were over the top happy, all of a sudden the pain was lifted, we had our new baby. Well, it turns out my body wasn't healed. I should have waited a full cycle, but I didn't. So we lost that one too. Jenn, the only advice I have for you is to try and focus on getting healthy. Even though your body cleaned itself out, that doesn't mean it's ready to be pregnant again. My first mc only lasted a day. And the hcg was at zero in like 2 days, so I thought that meant I was clean and ready to go. But the body is a strange thing. There is a reason we are told to wait at least a cycle. I do acknowledge that some women are fortunate enough to have a healthy pregnancy after mc w/out waiting a cycle. But it may not be worth the chance. Speaking from experience, that second mc is even harder, if you can imagine that. You take care of yourself, stay on your vitamins, and start thinking about trying again. Best of luck girl! And if you need people to talk to, this board is a great place to go! There are tons of supportive women here who know exactly how you feel!

 

Vicki - November 11

Hi Jean, You aren't the only one mourning the lost baby. I too lost one on tuesday night after over 6.5hrs of the same pain. This has been my second m/c with no other children. My baby's heart rate was really slow only 64bpm and that is the reason I choose to accept why I lost yet another one. The first step to healing is to heal yourself emotionally. For my first m/c was given a teddy bear to remember it by. This m/c I am buying an angel. Keep taking your prenatal vitamins, (since you want to try soon like me) drink lots of water always and try to take some time for yourself. I am sooo sorry for your lost and know how hard it is for you. Talking is always great way to heal. You will be fine soon. Keep posting so we know how you are doing.

 

Vicki - November 11

To M: Sorry to hear about your loss too. It was my second m/c too. Nowadays the norm has gone up to 2.3 m/c per person which really sucks. Who ever did those things probably never went through it themselves. Thanks for the advice on waiting a full cycle. We were thinking of risking it but will wait the extra month. What is 1 extra month if it means more of a chance to have a healthy baby. Best to you!

 

m - November 11

Vicki, thank you! I know what you mean. It's hard to wait. 3 days ago my ovulation strips showed me to be hitting my surge for the first time since the 2nd mc (3 weeks ago). My hubby and I have talked, and with the help of some advice I got on here, I, too, am not going to risk it. Like you said, what's one more month. One more month of "trying". That's the fun part anyway! ;o) Good luck to you all!

 

jenn - November 12

This board is wonderful. Thank you all for posting. I'm feeling better, phsyically, but mentally I'm still a wreck. I'm going on with normal life of course - I can't stop that, but I doubt that I will ever feel "normal" again. I hope that in a few weeks I can feel as optimistic as you all do, and not be terrified at the thought of doing it all again. My heart and soul just hurt so bad right now; its almost unbearable, and no one seems to understand my sense of loss. But, I will be patient with myself. Like M suggested, any amount of waiting is worth not having to go through this again. Thanks so much for your support and information. Please post when you guys have good news in the future. I need to hear that good things do happen.

 

m - November 12

The mental healing just takes time. You might think about maybe getting away for the weekend. You and hubby (or bf) take off and get away from things. Buy yourself something! Eat some good meals at your favorite restaurants, have a gla__s of wine or beer (if that's your thing). Just basically treat yourself. It doesn't take the pain away, but it does help. My hubby and I got away for a weekend like that and it was good for our souls. You'll be ok, jenn. Just keep your chin up!

 

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