HELP A Matter Of Keeping The Baby Or Having An Abortion

11 Replies
Kaila - April 6

I will be 8 weeks pregnant this thursday +/- 2 days according to the ultrasound. However my LMP was Jan 29 which doesn't correspond to the ultrasound, so I must of ovulated late or something. Anyway I was with one guy on Feb 17, and 21 and we didn't use protection. I was with the other guy on Feb 18,19,20 and then on Feb 26,27,28. However I did use a condom with him. Would I conceived from guy 1 or guy 2? Which guy it is would really make my decision to keep it or not. What day would i have ovulated??

 

RG - April 6

Was Jan 29th the first day of your last period? If so, it looks like you would have concieved on or around 2/12. If your periods are not 28 days, that can throw that off, for instance, if your periods are normally 32 days, that would put conception around 2/16. You have to remember that if you had s_x on the 17th...and say you ovulated up to 3 days after that, there is a chance that sperm from the 17th could still have fertilized your egg. I will be 9 weeks this Friday and the first day of my LMP was 2/4/05. As far as abortion or not....my best friend had one and she has regretted it every since. Now she was able to have another child later on in life when she got married, but some people aren't that lucky. Just really think if you want this baby or not...not considering who the father is. It's the baby you have to think about. It's your choice hon...just think it through and think about your life in 10 years with or without that child. Good Luck...I look forward to more posts from you. Just don't do something 'on a whim' that you don't think through. (there's always adoption too)

 

Misty - April 6

The dates that you had s_x are close enough together that it would be pretty much impossible to tell. But if whos baby it is matters towards what your decision is then I am guessing you have a relation ship with man #2 and cheated with man #1??? Not sure about that just a guess. Even if you weren't pregnant it would be best for you to own up to what you did. Things like this always end up coming out and he will definately never trust you if he finds out from someone other then you. Let him know and see what he says. Is the relationship worth saving anyway if you were at a place where you wanted to cheat on him? Just hopefully don't make the decision to abort based on him. A baby is more valubale then a man anyday.

 

j - April 6

I would think theres the best chance it is guy #1 - the fact you used no protection is a biggie - i concieved at a time when i thought you couldn't get pregnant, but apparently the sperm can live in the uterus for up 2 five days....throwing it all off!!! as far as aborting, don't rush into it...you'll be surprised how your feelings can change ...i was scared and doubtful that i wanted a c childright now in life, now i am so excited i can hardly wait!!

 

tiffani - April 6

Are you really considering ending a life based on who the father is? With all your dates being so close together, the only way to determine who the father is, is to get a paternity test.

 

K - April 7

No matter who the father is, I definitely would NOT consider abortion. The baby shouldn't suffer just because you made a mistake. Just wait it out. It will get better. ;)

 

amr - April 7

You're situation sounds complicated, but take it from someone who lost a baby last year and may lose another one now, find a way to make it work. Having an abortion may fix your personal issues, but what happens when you really want to have a child and you have complications? You don't want to be me in a few years, wanting a baby and maybe, not able to. I'm not sure how old you are or where you are in life, but if you don't think you can live with this child, I would consider adoption, not abortion. You'll be thankful later.

 

lilmum - April 7

no matter who the father is, you should base your decision on what is best for you. Can you handle having a baby on your own? You could end up this way no matter who the father is. I don't recommend an abortion, but i understand how hard this is for you, and you shouldn't let other's opinions matter. This is your decisioin and your life and whatever you decide could change your life. If you do decide to abort, remember this... when the time is right for you, you will appretiate that life 100 times more and be able to provide it with the love, attention, and necessities it needs. I hope whatever you decide is right for you, but you make you decision wisely and look at all your options. Adoption is very difficult, but would make somebody somewhere happier than they'd ever imagined. Good luck and keep your spirits up.

 

nn - April 8

My LMP was on Jan.26, I'm on a longer cycle, so the Dr. thinks I conceived around 2/14 or 2/15. I would guess you got pregnant by #1 on the 17th....no protection plays the biggest factor, it did for me. I was told by someone who loves me that almost all women regret an abortion, IF they were unsure whether to do it or not in the first place. If you are on the fence about it, think about you and the baby, and nobody else.....how do you feel? Good luck, I'm sorry your in such a position.

 

sorry to say this - April 8

First of all you can't take it out on the baby. It isn't his/her fault. Secondly you can't be surprised that this has happened. I am not trying to be rude but if you use your common sense you would never have gotten into this situation. Having an abortion is murder!

 

jess - August 5

you would murder your little teeny precious baby because you dont know who the father is? Kaila please dont do this , this is your baby no matter what and mothers love their babies no matter what the circ_mstances are .

 

brandi - August 5

You can't really be sure right now because condoms are never 100%. But that really shouldn't matter. I am guessing you are not married to either men. One might be more of a pick but what about adoption? There are so many Christian agencies who have married couples who are willing to adopt. You can even pick the parents you want for your child. Even if you do not want them to meet you. You would be giving a child a chance to have the ideal parenting situation a mom and dad who are committed to that child. Even if you choose to have the baby on your own, that would be better than ending it. I suggest you read through so many of the expecting moms entries on this site. So many moms are worried to death that something is wrong with their baby. It's a real eye opener. I hope you consider that. Good luck and God Bless. I know from experience this is hard but it would be the most unselfish act you could do!

 

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