Mothers Please Answer My Question

15 Replies
faith - February 25

How does it feel to be a mom to your first new born?Does it add happiness to your lives?I am 21 with a wonderful boyfriend and we're thinking of having a baby..is it too soon?

 

PP - February 25

Get married first and please make sure everything is right. It has put my marriage almost to the breaking point.

 

rose - February 25

i had my 2nd child at 21(my 1st at 18) and although i love my children terribly my one wish is that i had spent more time with my husband(just the two of us) we could have vacationed and laid in bed all day on sunday and gone out with our friends....these little things we will never get to do...not without babysitters and worries....take your time and enjoy eachother (even for a year or two more) and then if you decide to go for it you will not have regrets!!!

 

Maleficent - February 25

i've been an un married mother. it was extreamly hard. even though things worked out in the end and we are married it was a scary scary time. when we finally did get married there was no "honeymoon" period to speak of. we were too busy childproofing our house for our crawling 7 month old. no blissful lingering in each others arms, our son wanted to be right in the middle of it. no romantic dinners away from home, there was no one we trusted near by to baby sit. granted having the little guy around brought us joy and happiness that i cannot even discribe. we would not trade him for anything. but having a baby effects a couple in way you cannot even begin to imagine. it's not something to go into lightly. think it over, think about getting married. once your a mom there is no turning back, just be sure your ready to give your baby everything it deserves.

 

An older Mom - February 25

I have known people that have divorced after their first or second child arrives. I was married for a while prior to having a baby. We took trips had friends over and just enjoyed each other first before having the baby. A baby is wonderful but it also can bery very stressful at times. You are sooo young. People wait til their late 20's on into their late 30's these days.

 

sharon - February 25

to faith: I'm 21, well 22 in april this year and i have a daughter who's 6 months, i fell pregnant when i was 20, she was planned. my boyfriend and i had been together since i was just turned16, and we are so unbelivably happy. we were close before, didnt think we could be any closer, but she has brought us so close, the bond it brings is great, don't get me wrong at 4am when your absolutely shattered, and neither of u r in the mood to change a nappy, it gets tense, but its worth it, and you laugh about it in the morning. a baby is a weird and wonderful thing, so much expense and hard work, but the rewards are so worth it. and i have found that my boyfriend sees me in a different light since i had her, i think him seeing me give birth made him proud of me, and he keeps on saying thankyou for what i've given him and for makin him so happy. As long as your bond is tight and you trust him go for it, we had our holidays abroad, lay ins and meals and drunken nights out, so we were ready, but i'd get them out of the way 1st, then you'll have no regrets, let me know what you decide good luck.oh and a warning they are quite expensive!!

 

tiffani - February 26

It may be too soon. How secure is your relationship? 21 is such a fun time, I would consider waiting until your'e around 25 or so, that way you have time to enjoy the good years, and your boyfriend as well. A baby is such a wonderful life changing thing, best suited for a stable/ healthy/ happy family life.

 

jackie - February 26

Well like other people have said, "marriage aside, if you don't know that this is forever, I might wait on having a child". I agree with that, im 20, my baby girl is 6 weeks tomorrow, and though i have some sort of relationship with her dad, he doesnt live with me and isnt there with our child 24/7 like I am. I would have liked to be with someone that i know id be with for life, to help me raise my child. Though im doing this basically all bymyself excluding the couple of hours a week my babys dad comes and helps out, at first it was frustrating cuz i didnt know what to do, but my daughter means everythign to me, just looking at her makes me sooo happy. Regardless of how things are, i couldnt b happier.

 

s - March 1

having a baby is the most wonderful feeling in the world...there is really no right time for it..it is said it is better to have your baby while you are young..if it is that you are sure that you're bf loves you..then if this is what you really want go for it!!!Good luck

 

j - March 2

it is the greatest thing in the world!!!

 

Robyn - March 2

Im only 20 and pregnant for the first time. I dont think anyoneis ever ready for children so whenever you decide, you decide! As for being married, its nothing but a piece of paper and if you two have been together for a while then what does it matter? Most marriages fall apart anyways so married or not if you feel like you are ready and have enough love to bring another human being into the world, more power to you and thats all that matters! Good luck whichever path you choose!

 

momof3 - March 2

faith, I was 16 when I had my son. I married the father (now my husband). I had a lot of growing up to do in those 9 months. It was hard to adjust to being a wife and mother. also we (my husband and I) did not get to do all of the things we wanted to do. like go to hawaii :) But I LOVE my kids, each one of them! and I would not change a thing now! what ever you do think about it for a while before you do it!

 

faith - March 7

thanks you guys..i really made up my mind to wait this time..I really do appreciate all your warm and loving words of encouragement and understanding..Don't worry I'll still be checkin up on you all !!!!!

 

anonymous - March 7

having a baby is a huge commitment! I personally feel you should wait until you and your boyfriend are committed to one another before you bring a child into the relationship because as much joy as a child brings to our lives, there is also a lot of stress, sleepless nights, and frustration that can add pressure to any relationship.

 

Dez - March 8

I am 21 and me and my boyfriend arnt married and who knows maybe one day we will be and maybe we wont but I would change anything about having my daughter and if me and my boyfriend arnt together forever well I least I have her. Babies are very hard though and your relationship with you boyfriend will be put on hold so you both got to be strong people to make it through, because I seriously dont know what i would do without him.

 

To Faith - March 8

I am glad you decided to wait. Enjoy your youth, have fun w/ your friends, boyfriend and build a solid foundation before you decide on family. Best of luck! You have a lot of time : )

 

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