Afford It Or Not

12 Replies
April - August 30

Hi Everyone, I found out about this board a couple days ago. I must say its been ALOT of help! I have a question tho that is very imprtant. I want everyone that has some input or say about this matter to please do so. I am 23 years old. I have been with my boyfriend for a year now. Hes 25. We have not lived together, but he has been staying at my house for the last 3 months. We purchased a house together in March. Our closing date is November. We will be in the house for 6 months before the baby is due. Here is my question. We are both extremely conerned that money is going to be a BIG issue and cause lots of fights. We have taken on a huge responsibility buying a house before living together, AND than adding a baby ontop of things. Everyone including ourselves are concerned that we will struggle. I dont want to bring a child into this world, and re-sent it because we are unhappy and broke. Altho I cannot see taking a life frm this child because of hard times. My boyfriend and I love eachother very much. We are planning to get married but will wait until the child is old enough and we get on our feet. Does anyone think we are jumping in head fisrt and taking a serious risk.. and How much do babies/children cost monthly. I have costed out furniture ie, strollers, crib etc.. Im sure we will get most at Christmas Time and Showers. What are the major essentials that are gonna have us maybe struggle. (Besides day care) Any info would help. Im extremely concerned that this baby will put so much stress on our relationship that it will split us up! HELP!

 

SaRaH - August 27

I think that yall both are a little overwhelmed with all of the changed going on your lives. It is not overly expensive to have a child. Day care is quite expensive. I know here it is $80 a week. It is most likely that you will get alot at the shower. strollers, car seat, clothes, diapers. The formula is expensive unless you are planning to b___st feed. It does seem to add up but there is no exact monthly estimate. All children are different and needs can vary! Congrats and good luck to you!!!!!

 

?? - August 27

SaRaH, are you a Dr? just wondering since you have a lot of very good answers to many of the questions posted

 

SaRaH - August 27

No! I am desperatly wishing to be pregnant and I have been throught alot in my life an educated myself by reading and others experiences!!! I do have a child from a previous relationship, but I would love to have just 1 more. keep trying keep trying!!!

 

April - August 27

I appreciate your help. I think everyone is overwhelming me with everything. I dont think its going to be AS expensive as everyone says. I am hoping my dad will be retired by the time i have it as he is planning that in 2 years. That would save on the child care. Here its about 135 a week! And thats cheap! Normally you can pay up to 1000 a month. I think my hormones are going nuts and making me worry, Anxiety attacks quite often!!!

 

SaRaH - August 27

Yeah it is wierd what happens to your body and all the cRaZy emotions that go through your head!!!!! It is a blessing though!!!!!!!!!! How far along are you?

 

April - August 27

I know I cry and am so sensitive! I am going on 5 weeks.

 

Loren - August 27

April: I am educated and both my husband and I have very good incomes. The problem is, we have been married for over 11 years and I so deperately want a baby. I am currently early into my first pregnancy (w/fertility drugs) and not doing well. From what the doctor eludes to I may miscarry. My point is, no amount of money will replace the heartache you feel by not having a child when you so desperately want one. I would give up all the money and I would welcome struggle to be able to raise a happy healthy child. My suggestion is to jump in and be happy with your decision.

 

April - August 27

Thank you Loren.. You made me cry, that was very touching! Thank you for your words of encouregment. My boyfriends ister is having trouble as well. Taking fertility drugs and everything. I know that there are less fortunate out there and thats what makes this even more meaningful, that I was able to create this. I havent had a first ultrasound yet. Working on it. I am hoping that my baby is healthy... Im sorry to hear you are having difficulties, is the baby just not healthy? How far along are you??

 

Loren - August 27

I am about 4 weeks. My uteran lining appears to be inadequate meaning my hormone levels show the lining is not, thus far, proving to be adequate enough to provide nutrition to the fetus. I am not spotting though which is what is confusing. Thanks for you kind words and best wishes for your pregnancy.

 

For Loren: - August 30

Loren, just wondering how everything is going with your pregnancy. Any word?? Are you going to be able to keep the baby?

 

Loren - August 30

Thank you for asking. I have miscarried. I am terribly upset and numb. I do realize though that there are positives about this. First of all, I know I can get pregnant!!.. Actually, that is the only positive thing I seem to be able to muster so far but it is a start. God just did not think it was my time yet to have a baby. The hospital has a support group for woman who have miscarried regardless of how far along they were so I think I am going to check that out. Best of luck to all the rest of you. God Speed.

 

For Loren - August 30

Wow. Sorry to hear that! When did it happen? You arent in a lot of pain are you? You are exactly right God didnt think you were ready yet. Keep trying... It will happen.. always remember "everything happends for a reason"

 

ADD A COMMENT:


You must log in to reply.

Are you New to the forum? Sign Up Here! Already a member? Please login below.

Forgot your password?
Need Help?
New to the forum?

Sign Up Here!


Already a member?
Please login below.





Forgot your password?
Need Help?