Annoying Grandmother In Law

15 Replies
Susan - October 5

I just found out I am pregnant a week ago =)....everyone on my husband's side is scared to tell my husbands crazy grandmother b/c she is so controling and thinks we should wait several years before having a child.....she completely chewed me out for wanting to take a break from college and made me cry....She is always making me feel like I am trash and told my husband IN FRONT of me that he shouldn't tell me when he gets raises at work b/c he should spend that money on himself.....Does anyone have ANY advice on how to not let her get to me???

 

TruckinFool - October 5

First, you could shoot her, but that'd land you in jail...well, only if they found the body. Second, grow tougher skin. Also, just not go around her, completely disown her and go out of your way, and i mean WAY out of your way to make sure that you tell NO ONE anything that might get back to her... If your religious, pray for her, works for me when dealing with my mother, and i hate that b___h. Also, do stuff to make her so upset at you she can't say anything but bad things about you, then everyone will basically turn on her.....and if you need any advice on the not finding the body part, I know some excellent people.......

 

TruckinFool - October 5

Ok. just being a smart--- on the finding the body part....but ya can't say it doesn't cross your mind

 

Leigh - October 6

If I were you, I'd go read through some of the MIL threads on here. She sounds crazy enough to group into that category. And the stories make you feel less alone. As for what to do with her, Susan, you are going to have to stand your ground. She will hate you, but it is the only way you can live with yourself. First realize she is probably jealous; women are like that. Sometimes it's because they wish to be young and in that position again, other times because they were close to the person you "stole" away. If I were you, I would FLAT OUT tell her that unless she treats the mother with respect and dignity, she can forget about seeing this baby. You're having a baby, that's it, end of discussion - if she wants to be a part of their life, she'd better shut her trap and move on. And then, for your own sanity, please realize we all have an idiot from the other person's family. Don't let them rain on your parade, because that is exactly their goal. Be happy with your husband, be happy with yourself and remember that you DO have the control in this situation.

 

Fiona - October 6

Really glad I can't relate. Everyone in my family with the exception of my grandmother and my father in law is sane. None of us talk to either of them and they generally leave us alone. Maybe I can send some of my mojo to you.

 

Jamie - October 7

Anothre way to handle this...and the way I got my husband to deal with my mother, who is the evil mother-in-law in our relationship...kill her with kindness. If she says you're not good enough for her grandson, agree with her. Then ask her for advice on how to better yourself as a person. Call her 3 times a day, because you "enjoy speaking to her so much". Call and ask her opinion on what meals to serve before you go to the grocery store. Go by her house everytime you go shopping, to ask her opinion on the clothes you purchased. Get the idea? It took exactly 7 days for my mom to get the point, that it really would be better if she didn't try to control everything we did, but trust that we were growed-ups. lol

 

Kathleen - October 10

The only way to get to you husbands grandmother is not to play games!! Tell her she is being rude and your husdands raises or anything else pertaining to your family ( the one you made ) is none of her business. She will probably treat you better or at least you can respect your self.

 

Andi - October 18

I feel your pain. My husband's grandmother (his dad's mom) is the same way! She also feels that we should wait to have children. I don't care what she says. She's old, I'm young, I am married, why shouldn't we have kids. The worst part is, everyone calls her Grandmother, not grandma, not granny, but Grandmother, so proper she is. I only have one living grandparents, my mother's mother, and I call her grandma. I told my husband that when we have a baby that I want my grandma (from NY, I live in NC) to come stay with us for a few weeks and help me out. He goes, well why don't you want Grandmother to come, she only lives 20 minutes away. I was like because it's MY grandma not yours. Ugh! She through my a Brial Luncheon when we were getting married, and all of my bridesmaids were scaried to go to her house because they didn't want to get critisized. Grandmother always has something negative to say. My mother- in-law, who is the best, came over early to make sure everyone was dressed properly and such, and had to give everyone a little pep talk before leaving. Sad, right? Oh well, I dont care what she says, my family is ready for us to have a baby, my mom even has bought baby clothes, and I'm not even pregnant yet! I just love my family.They don't critisize or complain about you, they love you the same way.

 

baby dreams - October 18

I always find that the best way to make people angry is to be extremely sweet to them, to the point that everyone knows it's a joke. That way they have nothing to b___h about, because you are being "nice" but at the same time you are rubbing it in their face. I wish you the best of luck with GMIL... sounds like not a fun situation!

 

Susan - October 18

Well, it turns out I don't have to tell her the news. We found out a week and a half ago it was a tubal pregnancy....I had surgery Oct 13 and am recovering well...they did not have to remove my tube. Has anyone else experienced this??

 

A - October 18

Oh, Susan I'm sorry. How is your recovery going?

 

Susan - October 18

Its actually going really well....i am so ready to start trying again! the doctor said he is pretty sure that he got everything out but i am going to get some blood work done tomorrow to see what my beta level is. I am hoping we wont have to wait long to try again!

 

A - October 18

Well, I am excited for you then! I hope and pray you get pregnant quickly and have an awesome pregnancy! :)

 

Amy - October 18

Susan, I am so sorry for your loss. I didn't have a tubal but I had a missed m/c in March. I know it's such a hard thing to lose your pregnancy, no matter how it happens. I'll be praying for a quick recovery for you, both emotionally and physically and that you get pregnant again quickly. Then you can worry about the GMIL and what to tell her. Really hoping to see you back here and pregnant again soon. God bless!

 

Andi - October 18

Susan- so sorry to hear about your loss, I'll be praying for a guick recovery, and Baby Dust to you for your future baby making!!

 

SEE NILE ? - October 19

EASIEST way to handle her is to think of all the reasons why the world is such a screwed up place , even dream up a few reasons and blame it all on her generation SHE WILL FALL FOR IT IF YOU PUT THE PRESSURE ON AND DON"T LET UP !

 

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