Anyone Scared And Confused By Labour

12 Replies
Tina - April 8

Hi I'm only 24 weeks but I can't stop imagining what it's going to be like being in labour and it's making me quite anxious. People keep telling me how painful it is and I know everyone is different and has different pain thresholds but I just can't comprehend being in so much pain. Also I don't understand all the terminology surround labour as well. I mean, what does it mean when your cervix is effaced and is it possible to give birth when you are not fully dilated?

 

Jennifer - April 8

Tiba, I am also 24 weeks, and I am a bit scared about labor as well, and this is my second, so I have already been there, and done it all before. If you are planning on getting the epidural or some other form of pain killer it really isn't all that bad. The doctors and nurses will take care of you. I am more affraid of getting a C-Section then delivering Vaginaly, I hate the thought of being cut open!!! It will all be OK, and to be honest once you hold your baby, you will forget about the pain you were in, it is all worth it in the end. It is not possible to give birth when you are not fully dialated, they won't get you to start pushing until you are fully dialated. Hope this helps you a bit.

 

D - April 8

If I let myself think about labor, I can make myself sick (pretty easy with this persistent m/s) I am just trying to avoid conversations about the horrors of labor, and keeping in mind I have a good doc, who will drug me if need be! I'm banking on the idea that by the time I get to term, I will be so ready to get the baby out, I won't care so much about the pain anymore... plus, I'm a potential candidate for c-section.... Now don't get me wrong, I'm a reasonably intelligent person, moderately educated, and have had the opportunity to observe a c-section from start to finish from 3 feet away in a surgical suite. No problem... right? WRONG! I know its insane, but I have this fear that my guts will spill out all over the place. I told my doc about this, and she said that the people who have the most irrational fears about c-sections are the most professional & educated ones, because they know too much about what is going on. In this case, I think ignorance (to a certain extent) just may be bliss!

 

Leahp - April 8

Hi Tina!!! Helll yea!! I'm scared!! But your best bet is to start researching NOW!!! You will feel so much more comfortable with the process of labor if you know what choices you're allowed, what the stages involve and so on!!! I know labor can be unpredictable, but I've been doing my research and talking to a lot of friends and family!! For example, I'm thinking I'll do an epidural, but I want to try everything in my power to labor naturally with walking, hot showers, and the ball! But once you get the epidural you're bed ridden and some even have to have a catheder put in, you can't move out of the bed and that sounds miserable! But labor can be miserable too so what am I saying! I'm signing up for a child birth cla__s that may be helpful too!!! Have you looked into a birthing plan example on line, they will shed a lot of light into all the decisions you have to make. Stay calm and just educate yourself, that's the best weapon!!!

 

nhb - April 8

I would advise asking your dr about his/her policies on pain medication; my dr has no restrictions on an epidural, so as soon as she broke my water (I was induced @ 38 weeks), I asked for one, and had very little pain--I had an episiotomy and everything, although only a few st_tches, and I was walking around the following morning (I delivered @ 8:30 pm). When your cervix is effaced, it means it's softened up a lot--and I don't think it's even possible to give birth before you're fully dilated--the baby's head wouldn't fit until then. But I'd definitely ask the doctor about that. Do you plan to have an epidural? I made no claims about natural childbirth or an epidural before I went into the hospital, and just took it as it went; turns out, I wanted an epidural @ 3 cm b/c I didn't like the pain at all, so she gave me one. Let me know if I've confused you more . . . I've been known to do that occasionally ;-)

 

D - April 8

Just to clarify myself - when I said ignorance may be bliss, I wasn't referring to the childbirth cla__ses, pain reducing options, etc. I think we definately need to find out whatever we can about that!

 

C - April 8

Tina, its nothing you need to be worried about…….What it is its more like period cramps but worst for me it was a breeze it wasn’t painful at all. Also no you can give birth if you haven’t fully dilated b/c what it is, is that you cervix has to be 10cm for the baby to come through. Once it reaches then your ready to push. I think you should watch baby stories on TLC so you can get some sort of ides on what to expect..

 

leslie - April 8

I have come to the conclution that all the pain we go through in labor is so we forget about all the embarrasing and tramautizing things that we go through in labour..for example when you poo in the table..or when you throw up..or when you open your legs soo wide!! that they could see more than your hubby has in years ...etc..etc!! Everytime I used to think how embarrasing all this was going to be people would say "Don't worry bec. its so much pain that you don't care about anything!" so I guess I stopped worrying 'cause feeling embarrased right now is a waste of time.

 

Tina - April 8

Thanks for all the info girls you've been really helpful. I know everyone has different experiences of giving birth but I like to hear them so I can prepare myself better. Is it necessary to decide beforehand whether you wish to have an epidural or can you decide when you're actually in labour? I'm not sure what the pro's and con's are for having one. I thought if I had one it might numb the pain so much that I wouldn't get the same urges when I need to start pushing. I'm all for relieving the pain though!

 

nhb - April 8

You can almost always decide in labor, so long as you decide early on--once you've reached a certain point, it's too late, but I don't know what that point is. I think most people decide during labor though . . . But I'd still check with the dr about what his/her policy is for those, b/c some make you wait until you're a certain amount dilated, others don't. I didn't feel the need when I was supposed to push, but they gave me more than they were supposed to, so that's probably why I didn't feel it; most of the time, they turn the epidural down when it's getting close, so you can feel it when it's time.

 

Jennifer - April 8

Tina, I am sure that you can decide while you are in labor, I did, but maybe mention to the doctor that you think you might want one, and then they will not wait until it is too late to offer it. My water broke at 9am and I didnt' get it until 9pm, it took me a long time to dialate, and the contractions didn't start until like 3pm, and weren't bad until about 7pm, after I got it, I was pain free and relaxed, I even fell asleep, they woke me up at like 3am to start pushing, but I didn't feel the need to, so I layed there and kinda woke up a bit, and they turned it down, so that I would feel the need to push, it was around 4:30am when I started pushing and after 20 mins my son was born. I found that the epidural really helped me, and I will probably get it again. I just really don't see the need in suffering when you don't have to.

 

Heidi - April 8

I figure I should be scared, but I'm not. I'm only at 13 wks but still, I don't ever think about it. My friend tells me it's painful and could last a long time but I don't care. I figure if I can go three months feeling like c___p that when it's time for labor I'll be more than willing to take the pain to get this over with! Ha ha! I just have not enjoyed what little pregnancy I've had so far so I'm almost looking forward to when the time comes! I know it will hurt but it's just this one time, I know I'll survive!

 

sarita - April 8

i dont know how comforting this is....but dont worry about it. i was in labor for 25 hours and my body totally took over. its not something you can really imagine now. just be prepared as possible so you know whats going on and dont worry about having too much control. you dont have any. lol its amazing how your body will do its thing and you'll basically just be along for the ride. also, the body has an amazing way of recovering and forgetting rather quickly. it was rough, but its nothing I wouldnt go through again in a heartbeat. when you gaze into your baby's eyes, nothing, not even labor pains, will be on your mind. relax hun, youll be fine.

 

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