Are There Others Who Feel This Way An Advice

7 Replies
erin - May 21

im 18, married, and 5 months. my whole pregnancy ive felt like i dont want this baby. i know im not ready and i have no choice. i hate feeling this way. i feel very cold inside, i have no attachment to my baby, and i no longer have any attraction to my husband and i feel like i cant be with him anymore; this is so painful for me to even think, but its what i feel all the time. everyone keeps telling me that its just my emotions, but i thought that this far along it would get better. we live with my family and they advise against abortion and adoption and my husband agrees with them. i really dont know what to do and i have no one to talk too. i used to be excited about having children, but when i got pregnant i wasnt. i know reading this youll just think im a horrible person or something, but im not im just lost and have no idea or place to find help ( i live in a very small town. is it right to feel all of these awful things or am i just a selfisg 18 year old and never realized it yet. if youve had something similar or have any advice, i would greatly appreciate it.

 

Jordan - May 21

Erin*Hey girl!!! Well for starters , No it is not that uncommon for your emotions to rise and fall. Depresion is very common during pregnacy and after the baby is born. But try to look on the bright side hun. Go look link that says "cant get pregnant?" There are so so so so so many woman who would kill to be you! I hope that helps a little. As for your husand... I would suggest you two getting all dressed up and going out to a romanic dinner. Or maybe have a romanic night alone : ) You only get one life, being happy... or trying to be happy is the BEST way to live it! I hope the best for you , and your soon to be family. Keep me posted

 

Jbear - May 22

It's normal to have doubts about becoming a mother, and it's also normal to feel angry at your husband for getting you pregnant. I was furious with my husband during my first pregnancy (I was asleep when my daughter was conceived). I was also really depressed after my daughter was born. I realize now that I should have talked to my doctor about the depression, because maybe they could have given me something to help me. I think you should try talking to your doctor about the negative feelings you're having. The crazy hormone changes in pregnancy and the stress of pregnancy can cause depression. There's no shame in talking to your doctor.

 

Maddie - May 23

Jbear...how could you be ASLEEP when she was conceived?

 

f - May 23

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Stephanie - May 23

It's funny that you guys are talking about this subject because I just had a very deppressing weekend....It started Sat. morning. I just had this overwhelming feeling of anger and fear. I told my sister in law that I wished i had never laid my eyes on my DH then I wouldn't be prego now. I cried and cried all eveneing sat. and sun. telling my sister -in-law that I wish I had "taken care of it" when I had the chance and "maybe I can give it up for adoption" and "I really wish I could send her back where she came from." I know it sounds bad, but she has two girls herself and she said that she felt at times the same way. I hope I start feeling better about it because I want to love her, I just feel lots of anger right now. Maybe it's just hormones and it will get better. Everyone says that once you see it's little face, that all goes away....I don't know.... Oh, I'm 6 months today.

 

Bree - May 23

Erin, I can imagine that you are scared right now. Yes, the responsibility of a child is an overwhelming one at times. You are young and maybe feel that you are not ready. That is understandable. It is scary! I know, I got pregnant at 17 and didn't even have the baby's father by my side. I had to be all alone, my mother made me move out and it was so hard to graduate hs and work and care for a newborn. I know how it can feel. Please try to relax and understand that your hormones are very powerful right now and definitely play into your bad feelings. Turn to your husband for moral support. How does he feel about your feelings?

 

to Jbear - May 23

did you wake up at all during this conception of your daughter? I am curious to know.....(not being a smart-a__s, I really want to know) I once had a boyfriend try several times to have s_x with me while I was completely 'out of it'. He p__sed me off to the point where I got up and left his place and went home. He woke me up several times throughout the night and he was at various stages of 'getting there' each time. It was extremely creepy - and I did not like the fact that he wouldn't take 'no' for an answer. I was just too d__n tired!

 

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