Help How Do I Tell People

6 Replies
Laurie - July 18

I want children more than anything but I didn't plan on having them this young. I am 22, just started out in my career, taking classes at night and just found out that I am 5 weeks pregnant. At this point, I am stunned and a little upset, excitement hasn't quite hit yet. My bf and I have been together for 4 years, both have great jobs, live together, so there is no question in my mind that we can do this, but I'm terrified to death to tell anyone. I'm so afraid that everyone will be so ashamed of me since I am so young and not yet married. I'm most afraid of telling my parents. My older sister had 2 children at a very young age but she is on a different track in her life than I am. I was the college graduate, I had a lot going for me. I'm afraid that my parent's will be so angry. I'm also afraid to tell me boss because I feel she will be disapointed. I just need help on the best way to approach this and tell people. Please help me!

 

Julie - July 18

Well first of all I would wait until I am further along to tell anyone. I had a m/c at 8 weeks with my last pregnancy and told everyone. I would wait until the pregnancy has been confirmed by ultrasound or 12 weeks. Also I don't know how you tell them when your are unsure yourself but I am sure you will find a way. You sound like a smart girl and I am sure everyone will understand things happen and no one is perfect. A baby is a blessing and I am sure no one will be angry with you. Look at it this way when you start out young you have the energy for kids and you won't be 50 when they graduate high school. I had my first at 26. Good luck.

 

Laurie - July 18

I don't mind waiting to tell co-workers and friends, but my parents? I feel like I can't hide this from them, I am so close to my mother, it would eat me up inside to keep this from her. Thank you for the input.

 

Julie - July 18

Maybe you should just ask them to dinner or lunch and just tell them gently. Say something like: You know how much ______ and I love eachother and we weren't planning on starting a family this soon but it just happened. They are your parents they will love you anyway!

 

Robyn - July 18

I think its always the people you are most scared to tell that take it the best suprisingly. Like I was so afraid to tell my mom for fear that she would be disapointed in me and thats the last thing I wanted, but when she found out she was very supportive and when it was all clear and I was sure about everything, she as so excited because they were her first grandbabies! I was scared to tell my work also, but my boss has been so supportive and so have my co workers, helping me find cheap maternity clothes and giving me baby clothes etc....just go with the flow and I would tell your parents first. If you think it would be easier to tell his parents first for practice maybe, then thats something you might want to consider. Just to hear your two say it outloud might help. I hope this helps you! Good luck and congradulations!

 

*Kelley* - July 18

Laurie, I am in the same boat as you... 22, engaged and pregnant. I work and am going back to school in september. I am the baby of the family and so I feel alot of pressure. Telling my mother was the worst part. But no one will ever be mad at you. Put yourself in their shoes. If you 22 year old daughter came and told you she was pregnant wouldn't the first thing you think about be becoming a grandparent? Or watching your baby have a baby. As much as you think you can expect the outcome... I bet you a million dollars they won't be mad or disappointed.

 

Laurie - July 18

Thanks everyone. We are going to tell his parents first, I think they will take it better than my parents. As the day is going on, I am finding it easier and less stressful thinking about telling my parents. The initial shock is wearing off but it almost seems surreal and hasn't really hit me yet. I'm just feeling so many emotions all at once! I'm getting excited now :-)

 

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