Is This Fair

1 Replies
Nessa - June 27

I am 16 and I am 5 months pregnant. My boyfriend and the father of the baby is 17. He seemed okay with the pregnancy at first, but when his mom found out things changed. My boyfriend and his mother suggested that I move to Arizona where I am originally from, leaving my boyfriend in Florida, they stated that they could not afford to pay for everything and suggested that I move back to Arizona because I am part Navajo and they would pay for my pregnancy and delivery. At the time it seemed like the right thing to do. I am here now and he is there and I've been doing alot of thinking. It does not make since for me to be without the father of my child. I believe that his mom is making him dodge responsibility, she has already alienated her oldest son because she did not approve of his girlfriend. Could I get some advice on the best thing to do?

 

Melissa - June 27

Wow! You are in a complicated situation. It seems to me that your boyfriend is unsure about what he wants and maybe letting his Mom take care of the situation is a relief to him. But, to you and your baby, I don't know if it is fair. Where are your parents in all of this? If they have health insurance, you should be covered under that. If not, there should be some sort of government program you would qualify for to help you pay for you prenatal care and delivery back in Florida. The question is, what is best for you and the baby? You have to think about that first. Is it better for you to be back in Florida, and be with your boyfriend? I'm sure it would be nice for him to at least see his child be born. Would the situation there be the best for you and your baby, in all ways? How does he feel about not being with you? Are you planning on living in Arizona indefinately? This is a hard one because there are so many factors involved. The only way I would say to make the best decision is to weigh the pros and cons of staying in Arizona versus going back to Florida. Or, maybe your boyfriend could come to Arizona to be with you and his child. This would at least eliminate his Mother having any control. Good Luck!

 

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