Is This Understandable

7 Replies
YoungLove - January 27

Right now, I'm 16-weeks pregnant, and on MassHealth and FoodStamps. I'll be on cash benefits in March... plus I work 30-some hours a week serving fast-food pizza. Oh, and I'm living in a homeless shelter. So yeah, I'm living off the government a bit... but right now it really is what I -need-. My boyfriend and I are together, and he makes realitively good money for being only 19, 10$ an hour, 12-hour shifts... but it's not a stable job. I want to wait to get married until the baby is 6-12 months old, so that my benefits will not stop, just in case. Is this a selffish, dishonest thing to do? I just don't want to be without food or healthcare, should anything happen.

 

baby020607 - January 27

Sometimes you have to do what you have to do to make things work... The most important thing is that when this baby arrives you have the resources you need to properly provide for him/her. Although I am sure there are plenty of people who would disagree with me, I don't find it selfish to wait to get married if it ensures healthcare for yourself and your little one. Good luck!

 

SistaC - January 28

I agree with baby020607; look after yourself and your baby. I wish you the best of luck.

 

lunamoo - January 29

It is not selfish at all, besides do you REALLY want to start wedding planning NOW in your situation...? Of course not. Good luck and stay strong!!!

 

momma3tobe - January 29

I don't know where you live ( I a__sume it's not the US because of Ma__shealth) but I was 17 and my husband was 18 when we got married, he made less and we were able to find a place to live and put food on the table. I needed medical help, the cost of it is outrageous, but I didn't have to live in a homeless shelter..if you get all these benefits where are you spending your money? I think avoiding getting married just to keep getting benefits is underhanded, I get angry when I see people using MY tax dollars to support thier children and live in boyfriends. I got married, and in our dire times of need..there was no government a__sistance but I found a way to make ends meet. If people were responsible, and only took what they NEEDED from the Welfare system then it would be fine but that is abusing it, if he makes too much for you to qualify for it and he is there and providing those funds then you are, in essence, lying to keep them.

 

annaky - January 29

momma3tobe the ma__shealth is in ma__sachusettes. YoungLove i dont think there is anything selfish wanting to wait. Right now you need all the help you can get from others including the government. Than if you think again, from what you boyfriend makes you should still get all the benefits you are getting right now if you get married. Ten dollars is not significant at all for supporting 3 of you. No matter what, you should still get the benefits. Call ma__shealth ask for the minimum wage for three people also do same for the foodstamps. If you are eligible which I think you will be, get married and be happy, it is easier to have someone close to you all the time. Think about it, ten dollars minus tax, plus no matter how many hours of work it will not be enough for three of you, the government should still be helping you.

 

big belly - January 29

If you are worried then just wait. It is posible that you wont be able to get all the things you need. Its not selfish to want whats best for you and your baby. Good luck.

 

stephva - January 30

do you pay taxes at your job serving fast food pizza? if so then you have a right to any a__sistance available to you. I was on Medicaid when I was pregnant with my son at 19 and I kinda felt bad about it (but I had no choice) when I talked to my Dr. about it he made me realize something I hadn't thought about. he said, if you have ever worked a day in your life you have paid into the system, so therefore you deserve to get something out of it. The only way I would consider you abusing the system is if once you are able to hold a good job where you would not need the a__sistance, you turn that down & continue to draw the aid. that is abusing the system in my opinion. For now you do what you have to to make the best life for you & your baby..keep your head up & press forward. Good Luck to you!

 

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