Maybe Prgnant Drinking Smoking

10 Replies
no one - March 9

My situation, I am married to a great guy with a great carreer, but we aren't ready to have kids (I think more mentally than anything else) Having a kid terrirfies me all my sisters have kids and I feel sorry for them, because their lives are over now(sorry don't mean to offend anyone). So anyway, my last period was mid January, and we had (drunken) unprotected s_x one day (actually a couple times) My period has always been very irregular and I have always thought I couldn't get pregnant (tell ya later if you ask). I have experienced any morning sickness or br___t soreness, the thing I have experienced is, I had terrible nightsweats for a few weeks, starting before the period, and for a week or so I was extremely moody, I thought it was just pms, but the period never really came, I hate to be too graphic here, but for about three days I had sort of a brownish stuff in my underwear, so I was wondering if that was spotting? Ok and my final big questions are about my drinking and smoking (which if I am pg, I will give up) I have drank maybe 3-4 times since my last period and when I drink I go all out, 5-6 doubles and I will smoke almost a full pack of cigarettes while out. So I know it is bad and terrible, but how bad, like should I get an abortion (I don't want a baby, especialy not a retarded one) And normally I totally don't believe in abortions, but it would be odd to give up a baby for adoption, really who wants a FAS baby? I promise, although this sounds as if I am incredibly stupid, I am not so stupid. I haven't bought a test yet because I really don't want to be pg, and my periods really are very irregular and normally I wouldn't worry, but I usually don't have unprotected s_x. Thank you

 

P - March 9

If you feel like having a baby will end your life then maybe you shouldn't have children. Some people just weren't meant to be parents. How will you feel if you do have this child? You need to address these questions as soon as possible and as honestly as possible. How does your husband feel? If you are pregnant, I don't really think that the drinking and smoking will be an issue as long as you stop now. I also doubt your sisters will appreciate your pity. Your posting didn't sound stupid so much as totally self-centred. Be prepared to get a hammering from the other posters. Get tested and find out for sure so you can make some difficult decisions.

 

L - March 10

You probably will get hammered but I believe every woman should decide whether she wants none, one, or many children. I think those that don't-shouldn't! That being said, just because you made a bad decision to have unprotected s_x, you shouldn't punish your unborn baby w/ cigs and liquor. You need to test to find out where to go from here. Ignoring the problem will NOT make it go away. I know awesome, stable people DYING to adopt a healthy baby. Having a baby is a load of responsiblity and it does change your life. Great luck!

 

Lindsey to No one - March 10

The spotting that you had for 3 days may have been implantation bleeding but I'm not an expert. If you really aren't ready for children then you should think about a birth control plan. Whether it be the pill or etc. My sis in law didn't want children either so, It's nothing to be ashamed of. I would definitely test just to ease your mind. And also, if you are indeed pregnant, stop drinking and smoking. You never know, once you have the baby, you may have maternal instincts set in right away! good luck to you hon.

 

SugarPie - March 10

Wow. I might get bashed for kids.. but reading your verbage.. I wouldn't want you to have any kids no more than you do! Girl, you should have popped morning after pills like no tomorrow the day after you did unprotected with hubby. Seriously, I have major respect for a narcissist to admit they don't want children. It's beyond obvious that it is indeed all about you.

 

no one again - March 10

thanks for your answers and of course if I am I will give up drinking and smoking, once I started worrying about it I stopped. But I guess I don't have the mother gene, I mean kids love me, and I love playing with other peoples kids, but it is way too much responsibilty and I think too many people take it on think everything will fall into place and it never does, there are alot of good people in this world, but there are way too many messed up people out there and I wouldn't want it to be my fault(like how I blame my parents for my screwed up life) for bringing someone else nto the scene. And not that drinking and smoking are a healthy lifestyle, but I think things like the pill and other female contraceptives are unhealthy and have too many side effects. We usually use condoms and stuff, but the mood carried us away, I am not totally irresponsible person. Anyway, thanks for your responses and good luck to you and your future :)

 

2be - April 1

this is old, but i had to reply! so birth control pills have too many side effects..eh?what about having a baby you are not ready for - thats a side effect you should be worrying about...if you see abortion as a form of birth control you should have been sterilised years ago. people like you really suck the big one.

 

kat - April 1

it makes me laugh when people say bcp is bad for you but then they smoke and drink! WTF!

 

La Rae to no one - April 1

Just a quick question: those times that you drank since your last af - did you throw up or get really nauseated?

 

or not 2be - April 1

lol 2be I agree. This girl should be sterilised. What a loser. What does she means by a FAS baby anyway? People like her don't deserve children.

 

sarita - April 1

ok its NOT HEALTHY and i understand that....but many women have smoked all throughout their pregnancies and had perfectly normal babies. i currently smoke a pack a day (im trying to cut back) and drink coffee and socially drink alcohol....as long as you dont overindulge I dont see what the problem is. relax hun.

 

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