Military Wife Question

12 Replies
charlotte - July 21

I live in california with my husband who is a marine, and I am 26 weeks pregnant. I have been here for about two months and I haven't met many other wives, or many other people for that matter, and I feel like I am missing out on a fun part of being pregnant because I doubt we will have a baby shower. Both of our families live 2000 miles away and we only have his sister close by. I don't feel comfortable flying home and we can't really afford it either. I wish I could spend this time celebrating with our families but it just isn't possible. Does anyone have any advice?

 

DAYI - July 21

TELL YOUR FAMILY TO COME AND SEE YOU TELL THEM THAT YOU WICH FOR A BABY SHOWER AND YOU DON'T WHANT TO MISED THAT PART OF YOUR PREGNANCY YOU WILL LIKE A FAMILY REUBION BEFORE THE BABY IS BOURN OR TRY TO SAVE SOME MONEY AND GO AND VISIT YOUR FAMILY AND TELLL SOMEONE CLOSE TO YOU TO HAVE EVERYTHING READY FOR A BABY SHOWER EITHER YOU MOM OR MOTHER -IN- LAW

 

charlotte - July 21

I would love to but they cant afford to come out now either, they have spoken about coming out after the birth, should I just hope to have it then?

 

Jamie - July 21

I know how you feel - my husband's in the Army, stationed in Germany. So...no family for me, either. :( I don't know how it works Stateside, but I know here they have "Family Readiness Groups" through the unit - it's pretty much specifically for spouses/dependants.

 

Jess - July 21

Charlotte, I don't really have an answer, I just wanted to say that I understand how you feel. Family is so important and this is a time when you should be able to be together. Would any of your family be able to come and visit you? Money always gets in the way, doesn't it. :) If you can't be with them I would suggest sending lots of letters and photos. I am doing a website for my baby that I keep a journal on. That way my family that isn't close can be updated daily on my pregnancy. Good luck and know that there are people thinking of you.

 

charlotte - July 21

thanks jamie and jess, at least I know I am not the only one. now that I think about it, there is that family readiness group here too. I will have to look into that. thanks guys

 

Jamie - July 21

Also, my daddy got me a digital camera recently - we're gonna use that to send videos of the baby home.

 

DAYI - July 21

YOU COULD ALSO HAVE A BABY WELCOM AFTER THE BABY IS BORN AND LIKE THAT THE BABY GETS SOME PRESENTS TO SINCE YOUR FAMILY IS GOING AFTER YOU WIVE BIRTH.

 

KrisD - July 21

I bet, if your family visits AFTER The baby comes, you will be so glad you waited... They will spoil you and the baby, and they will get to see the baby. I am sure it must be tough, but you don't have all that much longer to go. Good luck!

 

Jamie - July 21

Dayi, I think you're missing the point. It's not the lack of a baby shower she's lamenting - it's the lack of FAMILY. Due to her husband's career, it is not possible for her to see her family at this point in time. I completely empathize...hell, my family's on another continent.

 

melissa - July 22

My husband is in the air force and i know how you feel we are 1300 miles from home. I am almost 28 weeks along. My parents are so sad because they wont be able to see there grandchild very often. Here on base they offer cla__ses you can go to to met other spouses. Also my husbands shop gets together alot so i made friends with some of the other wives. Also i started working that helped me make friends too. I remember the first 6 months were hard here, we are staioned at ellsworth, south dakota and it sucks!!!! The only advice i can say is wait it out and hopefully you will make friends with other mommies!! Also with the baby shower thing you could have one held back home for you and they can send you the stuff, it's not as fun as accually having one but at least you get some stuff you will need!!

 

dayi - July 22

sorry jamie i know is hard but what i meant was that you could have a family reunion after the baby is born and like that you will have a small baby shower for your baby.but like you said in this time your family is the most important part i'm sorry they can be with you but i'm sure they are happy for you and they wi;; come to see you once the baby is born.try to call them maybe once every 2 weeks so they can keep up with your pregnancy and wont missed that part. i hope you can see them soon .

 

Carrie - July 22

I feel bad for what your facing. It is a reminder of one of the sacrifices our military families face - missing their families. When my brother's wife was pregnant with a high risk pregnancy and unable to travel, they lived in Arizona and we are all in Ohio. She wasn't able to come back for a shower so we did have a video shower for her. Everyone came and brought gifts and we had food/cake and we videotaped the whole thing. Then we pulled each person aside and asked them to say a few words of congrats and encouragement on the video. They loved it! I know it's not the same as having your family there and ultimately I'm sure that is what you want the most. But it is a suggestion to make you feel a little bit closer to having a regular shower. Good luck and I hope everything works out great for you!

 

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