Monster In Law

12 Replies
JB - May 3

I thought it would be great to start a forum to let us women vent about our Mother-in-laws.

 

LESLIE - May 3

YES!!, YES!! YES!! I WILL BE HERE EVERYDAY!!!

 

JB - May 3

I'm 6 months pregnant. My sister just gave birth in March and ask if I would watch my neice this weekend over night. We went out to eat with my in-laws with my neice. All my MIL did the whole time was criticize me in a round about way. She would talk to the baby and say things like "We're going to have to teach these kids (my husband & myself) what to do". I've been around kids/babies all my life. I'm not saying I know everything but I'm not stupid. Then the next day she shows up at my house unannouced and did the same thing. She came in and woke the baby then started saying to the baby again "Oh your arms are kinda cool" over and over. There was a blanket within arms reach away, but instead of her just getting it or asking me for it. She kept repeating herself, talking to the baby. So I got up and gave her the blanket. She stayed for about an hour, holding the baby the whole time and talking to the baby not even saying anything to me. I understand that a new baby is fun and exciting. But if this is what I have to look forward to I think I might have a nervous breakdown.

 

JB - May 3

Oh yeah I forgot, she is suppose to keep the baby when I go back to work.

 

Karen - May 3

This may be a bit soon, but in defence of the "good MIL" out there. They are not all bad. I have a wonderful relationship with mine and she gives me little advices here and there. She does distintish that I am the mother she is the grandmother. She is wonderful to her other grandkids. Both she and I have a wonderful relationship and she says I am the daughter she never had (she has 5 boys). Just wanted to say there are some good ones out there.

 

Lynn - May 3

My MIL said that if she lived closer she'd keep the baby after I went back to work... I'd rather pay $2000 a month for childcare than ever have that happen. QUestion for everyone..my MIL has habit of "taking over" with my stepson when she comes down to visit.. she'll check & see if it's our weekend to have him & then make all the plans, pick him up for school, get him ready for t-ball, all that stuff that I feel we should be doing. Well, I know that the time is going to come when she wants to come down & will be arriving during the day while we are at work & will want to "pick the baby up from daycare" and then once it happens, this will be the routine every time she comes down. I am totally against this. I will happily leave work early to pick the baby up & spend time with her but I don't want to give her the chance to "take control" with everything. Things got kind of out of hand with my stepson.. .. his parents were both very young when he was born & neither was really ready for the responsibility & they were happy to pawn him off on her. when he was 4 months, he spent a month at her house & again at 6 months. She brags about how, before he started school, he spent more time at her house than with his own parents ... SO she is used to being in control of his life... and she is a very controlling person to begin with,,, many arguements have happened in my house over her... anyway, I plan on putting my foot down & keeping that boundary between grandmother & caregiver from day 1... does this sound unreasonable? I don't plan on preventing her from seeing the baby at all, I just don't want to let things get out of hand. What do you guys think?

 

To Karen from JB - May 3

I pray when my son is married I'm like your MIL.

 

Karen - May 3

To JB I feel the same way. This is my first child and I am glad that I dont have that added problem to stress about. When it is time for me to go back to work she has voluntared to take care of the baby til he is big enough to go day care, actully it is for as long as we need her. I soo happy cause it would be her or my mother. My mother works so that is not possible. Good luck to all you who have the terrible ones to deal with.

 

Carol - May 3

My husbands mother is deceased. It is sad to me because I never met her and I am sure she would be so happy right now. My hsbands step mother has been very helpful. She couldn't have children of her own so this is a totally new experience for her - no advice to give! She comes over when I don't feel well and cleans my house for me and makes me all kinds of yummy deserts. I have really enjoyed having her around!

 

w - May 3

yes i h8 my MIL, I'm w8ting to get rid of her I am due just a little over 6 weeks and boy these are the longest weeks of my life!!! She is an interfering old bag and my husband also cant stand her!!!!!!!

 

nhb - May 3

I have a great relationiship with my MIL. She's the best . . . she works full time now, so I don't get to see her as much anymore, but with my last pregnancy, she was always helping out, came over to keep me company, clean, didn't come over if she felt like I didn't want her to, took me out to dinner/lunch frequently, went to doctor's visits b/c my husband couldn't come, but wasn't upset if I didn't want her there either. She's awesome :) It's weird though . . . our whole "family" is dysfunctional . . . w/ my last pregnancy, my hubby's ex-wife (yes, you read that correctly) actually went with me to my prenatal cla__ses!! She was a good friend back then . . . now we get along, but just don't hang out as much. Anyway, back to topic . . . I hope I'm as good of a MIL as mine is too! I actually get along w/ her better than hubby does :).

 

Grumpy Bear 85 - May 3

Has anyone's In law invited her self to your ultrasound?? im going to to 21 weeks tomorrow and she asks and asks about the next ultrasound i keep saying i dunno, we were at a family get together for my hubby's family and she annouced that she is going to our next ultrasound!! i was like huh????? URGH!!! not to mention she announce to her entire entire family that i have now grown b___bs!!! so of course everyons starts laughing at me thinking im being to obsene.

 

Heidi - May 3

Some of you are very lucky. I only WISH my MIL offered to watch my baby for free while I work or come over and give us breaks etc. I know that won't happen at all! Maybe when the kid is five but other than that, she'll never offer to help us out.

 

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