Paternity

4 Replies
eckologik4 - March 19

I'll start off by stating that I was the other man in an affair. I'm not going to try and defend myself and I know it was a mistake but I have questions and I'm hoping someone has some helpful answers. I was friends with a woman for many years. About two years ago she got married. After about a year of her marriage she and I became more than friends and began a romantic relationship. We loved each other. I wasn't man enough to prevent it from happening. And I know it was wrong. We both tried to end it multiple times but it didn't last long. We were both weak. But we really did love one another. She's recently pregnant now and for weeks we discussed whether or not she should keep the child. She told her husband about us and that the child might not be his. She didn't tell him of the whole affair, Just that it had happened once and was a mistake. All three of us were against the idea of abortion but the thought of going 9 months without knowing who the father was was tough for all of us to swallow. We've since ended our affair and they are trying to stay together. It's tough. The details are that she and I were together on the 23rd and the 30th of January. She was with her husband on the 26th of January. All of these were late at night so I'm not sure whether or not to include the following day. her last period started on the 14th of January and she thinks she has a 29 day cycle. We've done dozens of ovulation calendars and have gotten different results. So she's under 2 months pregnant. she said she went to the doctor and took an early ultrasound and the doctor said she conceived on the 28th. Which would point to her husband as being the father. I'm not sure how accurate the ultrasound is for determining the date of conception. I will be there for her if the child is mine. I care for her deeply. We've been friends for years. But she's married so the situation is messy. Does anyone have any advice on determining paternity

 

clindholm - March 19

Most women typically ovulate in mid-cycle. If she is 29 days, around cd14 or 15. You can conceive up to 5 days before ovulation(that is the max, not average). Ultrasounds are not always accurate. I think the only conclusive way to find out is to have a paternity test when the baby is born. Good luck, it sounds like a really tough situation.

 

Grandpa Viv - March 19

Ovulation can vary from standard by two or three days in either direction. I would not like to place bets in this situation. Evidently the three of you are still on speaking terms - don't get uptight about it. Have a good laugh together, and offer to pay some child support if a paternity test makes you the father. Everyone loves a baby, no matter how it was conceived. Good luck!

 

Jezebel - March 19

eck, unfortunately, unless she kept track of when she actually ovulates you cant really know until the baby is born...even if she did keep track the dates are all so close together. im sorry such a predicament :(

 

Klasnaya - March 23

hey there is a test they do during pregnancy. She must be 13 weeks at least but they ask you wait untill she is 14 weeks to make sure ur a full 13-14 weeks. Anyways the only downfall is its expensive. Its 1,000 dollars but if its a real concern then its worth it. Its a new technology where they dont poke through the belly they just take some blood from the arm. Its easy. If ya want i can give you the webcite. Good Luck!

 

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