Really Worried

11 Replies
lisa - August 3

I am a 24 year old woman and am 35 weeks along in my first pregnancy. I am also an alcoholic. I have been very careful my whole pregnancy, take all my prental vitamins and never miss an appointment. However, my boyfriend left me recently and I have had several drinks on several occasions during my last trimester. I am back in AA and have a great support system again. I think I'm going to be alright but I am worried that I have hurt my baby. Does anyone out there know how dangerous it is to drink in the third trimester. I am scared to death that my baby will suffer from FAS. Please advise.

 

to lisa - August 3

I am sorry for what you are going through with your boyfriend and congratulate you on your recovery...I have not drunk any alcohol during this pregnancy so I am by far no expert at this...I am not sure what you mean by several drinks several times. I do know that the problem with drinking in pregnancy is of great concern when binge drinking (drinking to get drunk) takes place often throughout the pregnancy. If you only had a few drinks a few times you should be fine. I mean, in any case, it is done with you and now you are back to being healthy. So, I am sure that you are fine, and there is no need to worry about it now. At 35 weeks the baby is very developed and so please don't beat yourself up over this. Just focus on day by day and making sure that you don't slip again....Good luck!

 

E - August 3

Dear lisa, I don't know how to advise you on this. Several drinks on several occasions in the third trimester has been known to affect some babies. Others have been protected, perhaps by the mother's genetic makeup, or other unknown factors. I can only tell you that it is best to call your sponsor nightly and stay in the 12-step group. I would remove all alcohol from your home this instant, if you have any. There is no turning back time if you find out that your baby has FAS. Stop now while you still may be ahead. FAS may be the difference btw having one tonight and refraining for the rest of the pregnancy. You will never know. I wish you strength and courage. I want to say "don't worry" but in all reality, and you know this, you are treading in dangerous waters. Please be careful and surround yourself around people who are stronger than you feel. Know that I am thinking of you. Huge hugs, E

 

lisa - August 3

Thanks so much for your support. I have really tried to be strong during this pregnancy. I know what I should be doing and I know what is right. I bought my first house in June so that I would have a nice home for my baby and I really want to be a great Mother to my child. I hate myself for being weak so late in my pregnancy. It just seemed like my world started crashing down on me. All the plans I had made with her father not to mention half the finances are gone. I've just been so scared. I am not drinking now nor will I again. I just hope my baby is okay.

 

sue - August 3

Hello Lisa, you are doing so well. The fact that you are aware of your problem and getting help is wonderful. I am sure your baby is fine and thanks to your eforts will not have any problems related to alcohol. the time were your baby is most effected by drugs or alcohol is the first trimester when vital organs are being developed . Many women slip up now and then during pregnancy and give birth to healthy babies. As long as it does not happen again , I am sure your baby will be fine. Check with your doctor if you are worried. I hope all goes well for you and that you are able to stay off the drink after baby is born. Well done

 

nat - August 3

congrats on your new house and the baby. You sound like a strong hardworking woman , Well done

 

E - August 3

lisa, the reason I am so serious rather than telling you "everything will be okay" is b/c I am in recovery myself, although not w/ alcohol. People can say that but unless you are addicted to something, you know better. Slips often lead to a full relapse, especially with alcoholism. Alcohol is so easy to get unlike pills or illegal drugs. I know that you need to protect yourself and your child right now. You can do it, but slips are so risky, especially if you isolate yourself from your support group. I will always be here to help you in any way I can. Know that you are thought of and we wish you well. Oh, you are/will be a great mom and you know it!!!!!!!! Keep thinking of that sunshine in your belly. Please remember that the postpartum period is really trying as well, and can be a trigger as well. It was the final straw for me. I could not deal with the sadness of being so happy and vulnerable in my new life. I started self-medicating... Hence, I am now in outpatient rehab. Honestly, it helps me to be able to admit it to others, b/c I was so ashamed before. So, thanks for listening.

 

lisa - August 3

My problem too is wanting to self medicate for depression. I know that relapse is always around the corner and I try to stay humble to that fact. Both my parents are alcoholic and I have had to completely remove myself from them as neither really will ever get serious enough to get help. I don't want my child to have to go through what I did. Like I said before because I had this information before I drank, I feel completely irresponsible and full of guilt. I have no excuses for drinking. I had a one pint on three occasions. I wonder if anyone out there has had a similiar circ_mstance and had a healthy baby.

 

E - August 3

lisa, one pint of beer on three occa__sions is not something to worry about, as far as FAS goes. If it was scotch, well, maybe worry... I am a__suming you are speaking about beer? You and I know well that what you need to worry about is the relapse issue and you getting the help you need so that does not happen, now and after the baby is out. In all honesty, are you planning to use after the baby is born? You can be honest here b/c nobody knows you and we are all here to help. Do you have a feeling inside that you know you will use once your baby is out? Do you feel that a relapse is around the corner? Do you have a plan in place to deal with this? Does anyone that knows you are an alcoholic know that you have used lately? Please set pride and shame aside for now, and do what is best for you and the baby. Tell someone that knows you and can help you.

 

lisa - August 3

It was vodka and no I absolutely do not plan on drinking again. I'm just saying I have to be humble about my problem so it doesn't happen again. I am currently involved in AA and have many supportive friends but I have not been entirely honest with them as I feel they would want to hang me from the highest tree.

 

E - August 3

lisa, you have to be honest. you know it is the most crucial part of your recovery. besides, they are all alcoholics too. dont worry about them judging you, just worry about getting better and do whatever it takes to facilitate that. i am off to bed but i will check back tomorrow. are you okay for the night? are you worried that you might use tonight?

 

lisa - August 3

I'm off to bed too. I will be alright. Thanks for being there.

 

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