So Lonely

6 Replies
Tasha - bump - May 11

i am an 18 year old from herts in england a m around 6 - 10 weeks and i am going to be a single mum the guy dumped me a few days ago after 1 1/2 years i am so scared and so lonely i feel like people are judging me i have no idea where to start with a baby so any advise would be great!!

 

KellyO - May 11

BE STRONG, YOU CAN DO IT. I had my first when I was 17 and my boyfriend at the time, now husband, was only 16. We didn't get married for 7 years. I didn't want to get married for the wrong reason. It doesn't matter what people think. All that matters is that you be the best mom you can and remember that your baby comes first. I went on to graduate 4th in my high school cla__s and went to graduate from college with a Bachelors in Science in Civil Enginerring, I graduated with honors. I got lucky Dad stayed around. We have been married for 2 years now, and I am 17 weeks pregnant with baby #2. Believe me, you can do anything you want to do as long as you are pa__sionate and determined to do it ! Good Luck!

 

LadyD - May 11

Tasha, don't worry AT ALL as long as you take good care of you and the baby. I was 18 when I was pg, scared as hell, I came from a family that wants the women to wait until they are older and married and all that good stuff. I have the kindest most supportive mom in the world, thank God for her. I had an abusive, disrespectful baby father you could meet during that time. He stressed me so bad I had my daughter at 30 wks, she stayed in the hosp. for 1 month and her father was in jail 3 days before she came home. He got out 4 mths later, was too busy running the streets, went back to jail 12 days before her 1st birthday and been there since. She will be 6 yrs. old in Aug. Why did I tell you this long a__s story? To prove that I did it d__n near alone (mom helps ALOT- I live with my new man). I moved out on my own, was in school, had 2 jobs, and I maintain a car that I am still paying for. Don't get me wrong, it ain't easy, but it isn't impossible. You will be fine, just keep your head up and just be glad you have that blessing. My daughter was a blessing to me. I was in the Army, trying to get away from her dad, only to get kicked out when I found out I was pg in basic training (too much physical work would stress the baby). I think she probably saved my life, maybe I would've died at war. Who knows? I wish you the best of luck.

 

Bluemonster - May 11

First I want to say how sorry I am that the baby's father didn't want to be a part of the baby's life, but then again, he is the one who is going to be missing out on a beautiful life. As for advice on where to start with a baby is getting good prenatal care. Get to a doctor as soon as you can. Get prenatal vitamins to take everyday, and try to take as good of care of yourself as you can. And most of all, congratulations!

 

singlem0m - May 11

Hey Tasha, It'll be alright. The father of my child (I'm 6 weeks) wants nothing to do with me. He says that he cares about this child and wants joint custody - which I'm thankful for - but refuses to help me through the pregnancy. He says he cares about this kid and not me and refuses to be my 'slave'. Y'know what? These type of guys aren't worth it. Just remember that you are currently carrying all of his good qualities inside you now and you don't need him. You will be a wonderful mom no matter what. But yes, it can be scary.

 

livdea - May 11

Oh Tasha! I know how you feel girly. I'm going to be a single Momma too. I didn't know how in the heck I was going to do it...I still dont. When I told the father I was pregnant, he gladly handed me some $$ and said to take care of it. Never heard from him again!!!!! HEARTBREAK! So I took the $$ and moved. I freaked out until I was like 24 weeks along! I got depressed, scared...just not good. And then I kinda got over it. I'm going to have a little girl!! YAY! I went back home for a vaca (I moved from Hawaii to some random state) and I ran into the father of my girly. When he saw me he about died. He couldn't believe it...I had tried to call him but he'd never call back. Once he saw my little belly and felt girly move...he was in heaven. I still don't know what he is going to do...be a part of it or not and I don't really care any more. Of course I wish he would have been a part of it and of course I want my girly to know her dad but...as far as I'm concerned...I'm on my own and I'd rather it be that way. Of course I'd like to be married with a family one day but I no longer have a desire to be with this man. Anyway, I'm 31 weeks along and happy as can be about my girl. Hang in there...its going to be tough...there's no denying it. In the end it will all be worth it. I know what you mean about people judging too! Hold your head up high and flash that ringless finger! For a while I had a hard time saying that I was alone and finally I realized I just had to face the facts...IT WAS ME AND THIS BABY. Now if people say something about the father, I just say I'm the father too! Its no one's business. Also...I've never been hit on more in my entire life, since I've been pregnant! And I'm kind of "seeing" a great guy...though I'm not ready for a relaionship...he is just wonderful. Start saving as much $$$$ as possible now.. That's all I do is work work work and walk with my head high and my belly and b___t bulging! I'm planning on starting with the baby when she gets here. If I think about it too much, I'll just freak out. I nannied for 5 years professionally but never with a baby baby...I had like 1 and up. I'm scared but I figure it will all come to me when I hold her. GOOD LUCK! SMILE LOTS and BE PROUD! You're going to have a baby!!! YAY!

 

Jade - May 11

There are options if you feel strongly against having a child, such as abortion or adoption. The choice is individual and only yours to make.

 

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