How Do You Handle Mommy S Humiliation During Pregnancy

246 Replies
InDerVille00 - September 8

I am a man who is uncomfortable with a man being involved in this type of exam/procedure. Many, many on here keep arguing the "s_xuality" of it. I want to offer my view (slightly different) on that. The s_xuality concept plays no roal at all. That is not why I dis-like it. If you could guaranee 100% that the male doctor didn't notice or think of my wife at all it wouldn't make any difference to me. That isn't the issue. I'm just uncomfortable with a man doing that type of exam. It would hurt me deeply for her to allow a man to see and touch her there. I know she doesn't like the exam and I think most male doctors are professional, that really is irrelivant. This exam is a little more intimate that your average exam. My wife also doesn't like the idea of being examined there by a man and chooses not to go but she also knows how I feel about it and I'm sure she'd choose only women even if she didn't really have a preference for my sake.

 

InDerVille00 - September 8

Since my wife only goes to women, I know this about this issue because I had a serious girlfriend once who went to a man. We were both virgins, we has been dating a while and were discussing marriage and then I found out she had been going to a gynecologist for a few years because she wasn't having regular periods and birth control pills helped regulate that. In the U.S. they won't give her BC without a pap smear. Anyway, I'd was young and hadn't ever even thought about OB/Gyn's before. Once I found out it was a man I must admit it crushed me. I bothered me terribly. Anyway, we broke up (nothing regarding doctors) but I knew afterwards that this issue was going to have to be one of the criteria needed in a spouse. I knew I couldn't stay married to a woman who preferred a male doctor. I would be too miserable and would resent her. Luckily my wife was the next lady I met, once this finally came up we were both in agreement so it was never an issue for us.

 

InDerVille00 - September 8

I feel bad for the couple where this is an issue. Men who are bothered by it and women who prefer men or won't take the steps needed to stop men from being involved who are dating/married to men who are hurt by this. I'm sure it leads to pain and hurt feelings. To sum up, I don't think male gynecology is wrong or that it should be outlawed and I don't think all male docs are predators. I do think a lot of men are hurt by it and in a perfect world only people who are compatible in this area would marry. It would save grief and hurt. I've never had an a___l exam, if I did I'm sure I would only go to a man. I know if my wife told me she was uncomfortable with a woman "penetrating" me I would surely only go to a man and I wouldn't be upset at her over it.

 

InDerVille00 - September 8

Anyway, I wish so many people would stop saying all the male doctors are getting off on this, you hurt your case and so many people would stop relittling men who don't want men examining the intimate areas on their wives. There is nothing wrong with male OB/GYN's, there is nothing wrong with women going to them, and there is nothing wrong with men who want a woman to do the examining if that area absolutely has to be examined. I think most couples could come to peace on this when they talk together. I think most wives would go to all woman practices if their husbands were hurt by it. There are lots of options out there. We shouldn't say men shouldn't be allowed to be GYN's or that women shouldn't be allowed to go to them and we also shouldn't say men shouldn't be upset with a man doing this exam. If it is an issue, just go to women. Case closed. Go to an all female practice.

 

InDerVille00 - September 8

Sorry, I read ahead to page 8. Someone said it is a sin. I'm a Christian and no where does it say it is a sin. God judges our hearts, there is no legalism. If the doctor is doing his/her job and trying to help the patients health that is not a sin. If the doctor is secretly lusting after her nakedness than it is sin. God sees our hearts and doesn't judge by appearances only. You just make Christians look bad with these types of posts.

 

E457 - August 23

old thread

 

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