Mjvdec01 Reply On The Relationship Situation Thanx

2 Replies
Julissa 23 - December 18

I am 20 years old. and I know I try not to call him but it is so hard to ignore it when I just found out Im pregnant ,I guess Im just hoping that this guy isnt bailing out on me.! and I actually couldn't get a hold of him for like 2 days in a row so I called his house and his mom answered so I ask if hes there.. she says ''no he is working at an empire.'' so Im like screw it Ill just tell her now and ask that she pass along the msg. So Im sure his whole family knows now and his mom insists that he would not bail out on the kid .and there would be no stepping up as a father he already had a child with someone else! _______________ But He only calls me like every 2 days and NOT the weekend at all! ugh! but I talked to him lastnight and I confronted the situation but He Says that he has just been really busy trying to get work done. and he doesnt like when I ask him questions like Do you still enjoy my company .. are you cheating... do you still want to be in a relationship.. he hates it he says Im only trying to start a fight. I just don't understand If there where another girl why couldnt he simply say so! ?!

 

mjvdec01 - December 19

You are so young to be in this situation. You really have to let go of him, as hard as it may be. I am 31 now, but I thought I was in love at 19 with a guy a dated for two years. He began to pull away and I did the same things you are doing, so I know what it is like. The difference was that I was not pregnant at the time. Leave him alone and let him come to you. In the mean time, talk to his mom and see if she is interested in being an active part of your childs life or not. DO NOT alienate his parents, it would only end badly and the baby would take the brunt of it. You have to figure out how you are going to make it alone... with child support of course. Are you close with your parents? Have you even told them yet? Anyway, back to the guy, please leave him alone. If he is not right there for you there is a reason. Whatever it is, who cares. You don't want to be with someone that doesn't think the world of you, and you can't force it. Also, don't talk about him to his mother, it will come across badly and she will feel as though you want her to mediate. The last thing you need is him acalling you all upset because you went behind his back to his mother. If you don't discuss him, then he will have nothing to say. I have so many thoughts right now that I am having trouble organizing them. Just know that you CAN do this, and anything else you want to with out him. I am looking forward to hearing from you again.

 

Cat24 - February 6

julissa23 i would suggest to read the book 'why men like b___hes' i can't remember who it is by but it is brilliant! i read it and managed to get out of a 4 year horrendous relationship and it was the best thing i ever did. you need to try and get some of that strength, don't think you need him, you do not need that waste of space. he will just use up your time, your energy and a major part of your life and for what? he doesnt appear to sound like a good role model for a baby, use your friends and family to help you get through this. honest to god, he is probably looking at you as a nagging girlfriend who he can't quite get rid of. if he wants a free and single life where he does whatever the hell he wants, then let him go and do that. you have something far more precious than that, and in years to come you will look back and feel so proud of yourself for plucking up the strength to get rid of him! my ex was a constant cheater as well, and guess what....he didnt like answering those questions either!! just remember that you shouldnt be the one following him, ringing him, ringing his mum etc etc etc. it should be him doing all that running to you! and if he isnt, then he is simply NOT WORTHY OF YOU and most certainly not worthy of your baby.

 

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