Well I Guess I Ll Start Here

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Brando - January 17

I've been trying to do some research on what's going on with my girlfriend right now. We had been dating about a year, and about 7 months in, She let me be her first. Well 3 months later, She got pregnant. The first month was great, We were talking about marriage, being a family and raising our child together. One day we were out shopping and everything was great, We were laughing and having an amazing time, We went home to our apartment and laid in bed still talking about everything and we fell asleep. Literally overnight things took a complete 180 turn for the worst. We woke up and things started being weird, She got distant, Avoided me, and just didn't talk to me much at all. One day she decided to move back in with her parents, and thing started getting even more strange. We hung out a little bit while at her parents house, But things just seemed so cold, i wasn't sure what was going on. About 3 months into the pregnancy she decided she couldn't handle the stress of the relationship anymore and decided that we should put things off and see what happened later on after the baby got here, I reluctantly agreed with her. Now that we have done that, We've mostly all but stopped talking to each other, I'll visit her parents house every now and then, And it's just a cold hello and goodbye. She really hasn't allowed me to go to any of the appointments except to find out the sex of our child. Our relationship was great before the pregnancy, It came as a surprise to both of us, Birth control failed, Condom broke, and neither of us were supposed to be able to concieve without treatments. Needless to say we're here at almost 6 months along, and things just seem to be growing worse, No matter what i do, what i say there just seems to be a distance between us that isn't getting any better at all. SHe's bonding with her mother alot since all of this happened, WHich i really love considering the past was rocky for them. She has never told me or her mother that she doesn't want to work things out, just that she's unsure if we can. I've been here for her from the begining and I've never even had a thought of walking away, She's irreplaceable. Now she's been updating me on her own about the doctor's appointments, which is great that i know about these things. I recently realized that she blocked me on facebook from seeing her posts. Not sure what the deal with that is, But no big deal. I can already sit here and say that i know 100% that there isn't another guy in her life. WHen she's not with her mom, She's working, and vice versa. I know i am the father of this child, I'm the only guy that she has ever been with, Even that she's been in a long relationship with. before all of this happened she hated most men because of somethings that happened in her past, I'll not go into that because i respect her and her privacy, But she completely opened up to me, Which she had never done with anyone else. and our relationship had turned into something completely amazing, We both thought that we are soulmates, and it felt so right even from day one. Now she's in a stage of not knowing what's gonna happen between us, Unsure if she even loves me at all, and no idea if she wants to continue the relationship later on. I've remained faithful. I have no plans of dating anyone else, Like i explained to her mother, WHen the baby comes my time is going to consist of work, My daughter, and sleep between shifts. I'm at a loss here at what to say or do anymore. She says she's afraid of being a single mother, Yet she's making herself out to be one. I won't lie I'm completely scared to death that I'm going to lose her and our child. I know our daughter comes first before the relationship, This has been a rough pregnancy on her due to her own health problems and she's constantly in pain. She's become uncomfortable with me being around alot, So i've backed off and I'm rarely trying to make contact with her to avoid stressing her out, and I've not mentioned anything about our relationship, or what it may or may not become later on. I told her that no matter what happened between us, that I'd always be there for her and our daughter, and she took that as me saying i didn't want to try later on, but her mom talked her down from that. At this point, She doesnt't want to give our child my last name unless we work things out and get married, Then she said she would get it ammended, I respect her decision on that, She's stated that she doesn't want to file for child support, And i reaasured her that she wouldn't have to because i'd be there to support her already, and I WILL, stay true to that. I'm just at a standstill, I've no reason to walk away, But I seriously need some advice on this from fathers, Or soon to be fathers going through the same thing.

 

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