1 2 3 Magic

9 Replies
Heather F - March 15

I was surprised to see this mentioned in another topic. My parents used this technique back in the day with my 3 brothers and I before it was available in a book (it was available on tape and the parenting group my mom was a part of circulated it) and it was incredibly effective. I plan to use it with dd when she is old enough (she is 11.5 months old) - anyone else have any experience with this form of dicipline?

 

bradylove - March 15

I use it and it works for us. I had some issues with ds taking me seriously until I started using it consistently, and now he knows when I mean business and we hardly have any discipline problems. It works better now that he's a bit older though, 2 1/2, because he understands the consequences of his behaviour.

 

Renea - March 15

We use it too (I have 4 kids, ages 11 months - 8 yrs.). It is good, but you have to have consistent consequences if you have to get to 3. For my children, they know that if I have to say 3, that means a spanking. My 5 and 8 year old rarely take me to 3 anymore--usually just have to say 1. My 3 year old will take me to just about saying 3 before she is up and doing what she was supposed to do. I think it is a good techinique for my family.

 

bradylove - March 15

My ds will usually wait until just before 3 and sometimes he stops right after, but by then it's too late and it's time out, so he tries to negotiate. Like yesterday he was on the potty and kept pulling on my good towel hanging on the rack next to him...I asked him to stop touching it and he just wouldn't, even at 2, at 3 he was still touching it but with his foot instead of his hand so he figured he was safe..lol...anyways he still got his time out, but he screamed and cried for 5 minutes before the time out countdown because he thought he had outsmarted me!

 

Renea - March 15

Isn't is amazing how they can be so "crafty" at such a young age at trying to get out of trouble?

 

bradylove - March 15

I know, he amazes me everyday with what he comes up with! It actually worries me sometimes at how much he already knows about emotions...a couple of weeks ago he was sitting having supper and said "mummy, mummy mummy, I hit my head" in his sad little voice and pouty lips... and when I said, "oh what's wrong baby?" he started laughing!!!! He is just way too young to be that manipulative!!!! Then I think, boy am I going to have fun with him when he's a few years older!

 

CyndiG - March 15

I remember seeing that in a post in the recent past, and I actually said I do that, but I didn't know there was a book! LOL! My mom used to count also. It works for my dd very well! Usually her warning is 1, then if she continues that's 2, and I very rarely get to 3. I don't know what the book says, but I know it works.

 

Nerdy Girl - March 15

We tried this book with my very strong-willed 4 year old daughter and now we jokingly call it "123 CRAP!" because it did NOT work for us at all. My daughter could care less about us counting. We had better luck with "Setting Limits for Your Strong-Willed Child." It's sort of the same principle but without three chances to correct the behavior. You immediately implement the consequence.

 

rl- - March 15

this is funny when I was a kid my grandaddy George used to say 1..2..3.. "surprise" well I only got to the suprise one time and that was it LOL!!

 

sahmof3 - March 15

NG... Wish I had used that book w/ Nathan. He's the strong-willed type. Three chances (the type of three chances that my parents used... don't know about the book, never read it) didn't work for him. We had to implement an all or nothing system. You listen the first time or you sit in the higchair in the corner and do NOTHING... unfortunately not one single form of punishment worked besides that on him until he was over age 3 and had real interests. We tried taking favorite toys, games, etc.... he'd find something else to so. We tried spanking.... he laughed in our faces. We tried stripping his room and putting him in there (partly for punishment, partly because when you have a kid like that they need to be out of your face so you don't hurt them!)... and he would just jump up and down, do stretches, you name it.... he was ingenious at entertaining himself and frustrating the c___p out of us! So the all or nothing came in to play because we strapped him into the high chair, which was uncomfy because it was too small and put it in the corner. He hated being restrained, so that was our only effective punishment until he got older. Now he has things that he loves and values (bike riding, roller-blading, computer games, etc.) and discipline is pretty easy now. We still have to do the one strike, you're out, though, as he will try to get away with murder/ negotiate/ pest, etc. if the punishment is not immediate. My dd was a fairly easy 2yo... she was spanked maybe 1-2 times and the threat of something dear being taken was enough to shape her up, counting to 3 often worked, etc. She's more stubborn at age 3, but also holds things dear that she doesn't want to lose. She goes through small phases where she gets stubborn and loses a favorite (the last thing she lost was her pinky blanket... she was traumatized and has been a saint ever since LOL), and then she's pretty good for like a month. She's like 300% easier than Nathan was at that age lol. Justin seems pretty easy except for a shrieking habit, then again he's only 20 months!

 

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