Anyone Else With 2 Boys Girls Get Rude Comments

10 Replies
bubbasmom - September 2

I have a 2.5 year old son and a 5 week old son. I am thrilled I have two boys after seeing how much my 2.5 year old loves his brother. I am hopeful they will have a great relationship when they are older. But, I keep getting comments of "are you going to try for a girl?" These comments make me feel like people think my family is inadequate because we have two boys and not a boy and a girl. Does anyone else get these comments? I'm also tired of hearing the comment, "we have a boy and a girl, so we're done having kids." Truth is, if we tried for a third, I will be thrilled with another boy.

 

DDT - September 2

Haha yes I get the same comments but I don't take them in such a negative light (maybe I should be?). I have 2 sons (18 months/3 months). I have heard the "we have a boy and a girl, so were done having kids" comment more times than I would like to though. It usually comes from people who want the picture perfect life and family...or who think they do anyway. IMO having two of the same s_x siblings close in age is going to be fun for them. They can play together. That being said dh wants to try again in a couple of years for a girl...but secretly I hope its another boy. I don't think I am mentally tuned in for a girl and their dramatic ways. I was never a girly-person.

 

sarah21 - September 2

Really I don't think anyone means anything by it. They aren't suggesting that you're incomplete or inadequate, in my opinion. It's more of a conversation starter or curious question, I think, and I would say the vast majority of couples would like at least one of each s_x just to experience it.

 

preggosauce - September 3

I get that all the time too. Especially from my family! They are all like "well, now you have to try for a boy!" ( I have two girls, a 2 year old and a 5wk old). Even after I explain to them that we are FOR SURE done having kids, I STILL get them saying that. I love having two girls. Growing up I had one sister and we are VERY close, I'm hoping for that same kind of relationship for my two daughters. I always said that I wanted 2 of the same s_x, I just think they end up having a closer relationship than a boy and a girl. Plus, I keep telling my husband that we can try all he wants for a boy...but he'll just end up with 5 girls. haha.

 

tryin44 - September 3

I have two boys 8 and 9 and two girls 2.5 and 11 months. Now I get tired of hearing o wow, you have the perfect family. How did you swing that. Well, when we went for # 3 we were fully expecting a boy. We were surprised to have a girl. Then #4 accidently came along and we still were thinking oh odds are still on a boy. ANyways, it can go both ways I believe. A complete family is all in the eye of the beholder. I would feel the same i'm sure if I had four boys. I must be honest though and say I am glad I was blessed with both but I am no more complete as a mom or a family.

 

bubbasmom - September 3

Thank you to everyone for your replies. I suppose I am being a bit sensitive, but these comments really bother me. I think two boys is great for my family (I am not a girly-girl) and I hope their relationship will be strong. I suppose there is the a__sumption that the perfect family is a boy and a girl. The comments just make me feel that my family isn't quite complete by others standards.

 

ACG - September 3

I think Sarah's right that it's probably just a conversation starter - people trying to be friendly and make small talk. I know, though, be that as it may, it gets tiresome hearing the same inane comments over and over again. It's like when you're pregnant and you get tired of, "How far along are you? Boy or girl? Wow, you're huge!" It just gets old, even if people don't mean anything negative by it.

 

Crystal83 - September 4

I get this all the time! It gets really annoying too.....I have 3 girls and DH and I are always getting comments like: "When are you going to ever get a boy?" or to my hubby: "What's goin on, you only got girl swimmers!" Of course these are mostly comments from family and friends and they are joking around, but it still gets to me sometimes, and DH never says anything but I know sometimes it gets to him too. It just one of those things you have to let roll off your back I guess.

 

denimb__terfly - September 4

Ha ha! I feel your pain and I had a boy and a girl first. Then, I had a third child (a boy) 8 years later and now I have to hear oh so you need another so you can have an even 2 and 2. I am like "what?" Since when does it have to be an even count? Who makes that rule up? And, I hear it ALL THE TIME!! Go figure! Children are a blessing whether they are going to pee sitting or standing and I think they are all wonderful and people should keep their mouths shut unless they are going to say something nice (hmm... think we all have heard that addage before!!!)

 

GloriaD - September 8

I don't know why others are so interested in what your family should look like! I actually wanted boys and got 1 boy and 2 girls instead. I love all my kids but to each their own!

 

bubbasmom - September 8

I'm so glad to hear I'm not the only one feeling like this. I just need a good response to people who makes these comments.

 

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