Frustrated

7 Replies
vonzo - January 23

Sorry, me yet again. I just need to vent!! We have my stepson staying tonight and i get so irritated by his mother. her and dh have been split for about 3.5 years now (she got preg on purpose) and she's still a vicious manipulative cow who doesn't seem to give 2 hoots about her own child. He never gets fruit or veg and i mean NEVER! My dh asked her nicely one day if she'd start giving him it as we are here and it would give him continuity and make him realise that its good for him and he has to eat it (he's 7) and she said I don't have time to prepare all that kind of c__p for him and its too expensive?!?!?! All hegets are microwave meals and take aways. She's unemployed and sponges off of the government. I'm all for being a sahm but she just plays the system and cheats it for all she can get. She sits on her fat ass all day doing nothing, she doesn't even clean up. He got a rabbit for his bday and it died a few months later because she refused to clean it out. She never makes him wash his face or clean his teeth before bed or when he gets up. He gets a shower maybe once every 4 days and even then he's not cleaned properly. He doesn't even have a toothbrush there. She doesn't do his homework with him, just plonks him in front of the tv all day and leaves him, or sends him to her mums while she goes and liquidises all her benefit money. Sorry about the mess of this but i am just sooo angry that she is so lazy and selfish when there are women out there who would give anything to have a child.

 

vonzo - January 23

OH she also bad mouths me and my dh to him and tells him he cant say anything because it's a secret and he'll get in trouble if he does. He's let slip a few times by accident now andi am disgusted. I mean we dislike thiswoman immensly but i would never bad mouth her to her own son as that's not fair on him. He shouldn't be put in that position or have to hear those kinds of things like his dad doesn't care about him now that he has a new baby and that he doesn;t have to listen to what we tell him to do and that we're both wastes of spaces and losers. My dh has always been and will always be there for his son 110% and its cruel to say otherwise to a 7 yr old boy!

 

Rabbits07 - January 23

That's so sad....it sounds like he is basically neglected when he is with her. Has your dh ever thought about applying for full physical custody? Don't know if that is something the two of you are up for, but it sounds like the poor little guy would be much better off in your household.

 

sashasmama - January 23

Does your dh have any custody of his son? Maybe that could be brought up and set up for court again so he could get half a week with him or so and he could stay at your place, if you don't mind of course, and that way you could show him and teach him all those things, because it sounds like she is completely neglecting that little boy. She's ruining his life, he needs some tlc and someone to tech him how to take care of himself and show him how to eat right.

 

sashasmama - January 23

Oh yeah, rabbits, I would say full custody is even better, as long as that can be worked out.

 

BreaunasMommy - January 23

she sounds aweful. Maybe your dh should try to get custody it sounds like he can put up a real good case against her being an unfit mother. It awful to say but you could call dfcs on her as well. She would be investigated and if they see her as unfit then yall could get him. It really does suck to see moms out there like this. So sad for the children who go through this.

 

Nerdy Girl - January 23

I agree with Rabbits. I don't know much about this kind of stuff, but I have heard that it's pretty tough to remove a child from their mother unless there is a clear cut case of abuse or neglect going on. You could start piecing together some concrete evidence of the neglect and improper care over the next month or so before you would make an official move towards gaining custody.

 

vonzo - January 23

we've been to see a solicitor and he wouldn't get full custody. They don;t take a child away from the mother unless their deemed at high risk. He gets him every time he's off which is about twice a week on average depending on his shift pattern that week. Also the wee boy loves his mum to bits (understandably) so would be bad for him to do that. We just tried to be amicable toward her and ask nicely to impliment a few things which would be beneficial to him but she just gets on her high horse and says she's a great mum and doesnt need any advice. She'll bring up her son the way she wants. GRRRRRR

 

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