I Hate Feeling Like This

14 Replies
anon - February 16

I'm too embarrassed to even login with my real name. I just have to get this off my chest. I stay at home with my baby and it is really getting to me. My baby is very demanding all the time. Each day is the same cycle. Deal with it during the day and pray for some sleep at night. It is getting to me. This is not how I thought I would feel. I've always loved babies. Even worked at a daycare and dealt with it great. I hate how I feel now though. I feel like a HORRIBLE mother... I daydream about how my life was before and then almost lose it when I realize how my life will be from now on. I don't deserve to be a mother if I feel like this. I am crying even now. I hate this.

 

pbj - February 16

How old is your baby? If you have a newborn it is quite the same everyday...but I promise you it will get better. My dd is 3 mths and sleeps at least 8 hours a night, and is so fun to play with now. Remember sleep deprevation can make you miserable.

 

nn - February 16

i too feel like this often............i understand girl, you are not alone.......

 

katie - February 16

yes, how old is your baby? i felt exactly the same way when my first was a newborn...but it DOES get better.

 

anon - February 16

My little one is just over 2 months. When will it get better? Everyone keeps saying it changes at 3 months, but I can't see it changing that much in such a short time........

 

To Anon - February 16

Sorry to hear you're feeling like this. It may just be post partum depression. I a__sume this is your first? Trust me, it will get better. You're right, babies are very demanding, they can't do anything on their own, so you always have to be there. It does get better as they grow. I look at my 4 month old daughter and everyday it's like she's learning something new and I love to see the way she discovers things, puts everything in her mouth, the way she giggles, lifts her head, kick and much more. With time they become more independant and you'll love watching them grow. It is tough at the begining, but it gets MUCH better, hang in there! Do you have the baby's father or some family that could watch your baby while you get out for acouple hours? Having some time to yourself will really help you cope better. We'll be praying, and let us know how you're doing! And, no, you are not a bad mother. There are a million other new moms that feel the same way. You're not the only one. Take care.

 

mel - February 16

don't feel bad!!! you're only human aren't you? I can remember those same exact feelings when I had my son almost 5 years ago. and there's no exact date for when it will get better. every child is differnt, but it definately WILL get better. it has to. otherwise no woman in this world would have more than one baby! :-) don't expect too much from yourself. be strong enough to admit, when you need a break and find someone to give you one. do you have any family or friends that could keep the baby for you? overnight would be best (and yes, I know from experience how hard that is for a new mother to do) but even just for a few hours during the day, so you can lock the bedroom door, close the blinds and just nap away some of your frustrations. believe me....it will make you feel like a new woman! hope things get better for you real soon!

 

Grantsmom - February 16

I felt the same way at first too Anon. You certainly are NOT a horrible mother. You are a very human and normal one. I think the majority of women go through those feelings although some will not admit to it. My son is 2 months now and my feelings are starting to change and yours will too. Is there a church or daycare in your area that offers a mother's morning out? There usually are. Do you have any family close by or friends that could keep the baby maybe one day a week, or even a half a day? You'd be amazed how much better you feel after just having a few hours to yourself. All of our family is out of state, so I understand the feeling of never having a moment that you aren't responsible for this little person. Thankfully I have a husband who is very involved. Do you have a husband or Boyfriend that needs to help out more? If that is the case sit him down and have a heart to heart about it. You are not a bad mother for needing some time for yourself. Every person has a need for some "me" time. You deserve it. I hope things get better soon. Please keep sharing with us and we'll try to help.

 

wanda - February 16

You are not a horrible mom for having a bit of baby blues. Are you a single parent? Maybe you can ask your DH or relative to take the baby sometimes. All mothers need time to adjust to a parent. I had my first at 20. If it wasn't for my ex-hubby, I think I would have been very depressed. My first born lost oxygen(cried all the time)....I know you're probably tried of hearing this about like PBJ said life will get easier. You will learn how to read your little one's cry and bond so much with your little one. If you keep crying or feel more sadder than usual. Please talk to your doctor about on start of depression. Sometimes talking to someone truely helps. Congrats on your newborn!! Enjoy them will there small. Hugs

 

kris A. - February 16

I agree with everyone here... we all feel this way at one point in time... and then a week goes by, then another... you are so close to the day you will wake up, hear little one crying, and you'll go in and the babe will smile - a huge, happy, just for you smile, and you will melt. And then everyday another 'little thing' will happen - it WILL be better SOON. Hang in there.

 

JL - February 16

You are not alone! We all feel this way.

 

Jen - February 16

I know how you feel. I am the same way. I work for my parents and have been working from home since I came home with her, but it get really hard because she is so I call it high maitance. I to worked a at daycare and l alway have a baby in my arms at family parties but I never knew that it was going to be like this. i would not trade it in for the world but I would love it if she would be able to entertain herself for a while so I can get some things done. The sleep thing is really bad. You put her down and she wakes right back up! I get so annoying! I think it will get better but it is going to take a long time. I am not a bad mom and neither are you. I think we all feel like that at some point. It will get better!

 

Brandy - February 16

Anon, I too am with you. My son will be 2 months this coming Monday, and I am exhausted. The sleep deprivation should be considered a form of capital punishment. I love my son, but sometimes I just cry and cry. He is starting to smile and goo and that is definitely helping....a little reward. However, I am longing for him to sleep all night. I miss the nights of pregnancy when you could go to bed at 7pm and no one would question you. Hang in there:) We just need to be there for each other.

 

Trac - February 17

Everyone has felt like you before. The good thing is you are able to express it and know that you are not a bad person. Like the other said, try to get help, even if it's just for an hour or two. It will do wonders for you. And, it does get better. My little one was very demanding for the first 2-3 months but now is so much better. Hang in there.

 

anon - February 17

I really appreciate everyones comments and encouragements. It really means a lot to me. It is true that I get "little rewards" when she smiles in the mornings, but she is such a bad sleeper during the day that she is pretty cranky for most of the time. I do have a husband, but he works a lot and being home with the little one from 7-7 takes a toll. I really hate to complain... my brain tells me I'm normal and that things will get better, but it is hard to feel better sometimes. I truly thank all of you for taking the time to post. If anything, that makes me feel a little more sane.

 

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