I Want A Second Baby Sooo Bad

12 Replies
sashasmama - February 8

For the last two days I've been dying to have another baby...I don't know what to do, I just want to be pregnant again soooo bad. My dd is 14 months old, and I just now got my body back...and a part time job. I don't know how to stop this urge. I just stopped taking BCP a month ago, and I should be ovulating in 2 days, I'm sure that's what makes me want a baby. Please tell me how it is with a second one, all the truth, is it sooo much harder? I'm about to cry I want another one...

 

luviduvi - February 8

Does your hubby want another one? Have you talked to him about not being on the pill? I got prego with my second one when dd was 12 mos. It is a lot more difficult with two b/c one will need you when the other one has you, you will have little time to yourself, you will find yourself feeling guilty about not giving one or the other enough time etc. etc. I am not saying that it is bad to have a second one if you have help from your hubby. My hubby helps out a lot (when he is not at work). It is a big adjustment at first, but I do think it gets better. They say once your 2nd lo gets bigger and able to play, they play together which is nice. (until they start fighting) About your figure, in my experience, I got my body back in a year with the first one, with the second one, I lost all of my weight within 4 months, but my body is completely different.

 

aurorabunny - February 8

I feel that way from time to time as well. Just to curb my urge I remind myself of morning sickness, the migraines I got, not being able to sleep well, having to pee all the time, getting HUGE, mood swings, not being able to have a cigarette or a drink.....and how hard that would all be doing it while taking care of a baby! Of course I just tell myself these things since I know we're not ready for another one yet, if you guys are wanting another one right now, by all means forget what I said and just think about all the wonderful parts that by far outweigh the bad stuff. =)

 

HEATHER - February 8

I am preg now, my kids will be 18 months appart. I actually at 3 months post pardum with my dd, I started having a huge drive to have another, dh was like yeah right, but a few months later.... sofar this pregnancy is a breeze!!! only 4 weeks or so left!

 

dee23 - February 8

yeah i get the urge sometimes, but i now have anxiety about labor, so that is the only thing stopping us...plus ds is 7 months so i wouldnt contemplate it so soon anyway.

 

Brittany - February 8

I have a son and daughter 19 months apart. It's awesome having a boy and girl, it's such a great mix, blue and pink all over our house haha! I love it. I'm used to big families too so having two for me isn't hard. It's just extra laundry and an extra mouth to feed but I love always being busy. We won't be having another so soon but we'll definitely have more in the coming years. Just make sure you and hubby are on the same page, thats important. If he doesn't want another, respect that, guys are different than us women lol. I love having two kids though, I feel like everything is perfect. It's the best feeling in the world to see them interact too, my son kisses his little sister and they play together and laugh. It's like they need eachother and them being closer in age is perfect, they can grow up together. Just think things through, is another baby going to be financially straining? Will it affect your job? Will it affect your life/relationship? Good luck!!

 

Erin1979 - February 8

I got that urge from time to time as well. My dd is almost 18 months. We originally wanted kids closer together, but it just wasn't right for us when it came down to it. I find it's worse when friends or family have babies, or announce they are pg. (like my friend just had twins, and 2 of my cousins are pg....) Now that my dd is 18 months, we are thinking that it is a better time....we're "ttc" but just trying to go with the flow...make it fun too!

 

Topaz - February 8

I know exactly how you feel. Sometimes I have this overwhelming feeling that I want to get pregnant and have another baby so badly! Dd is 1 yr. old and her father and I are getting married in 4 months so there is no way I can get pregnant before that. I have finally lost all my baby weight and can buy cute clothes again and I love it. I also love the age of my daughter. She is so much fun. Sometimes I feel like I would be letting her down to have another one so soon. I think 2-3 years apart would be good. I keep asking people how having two kids is also. I hear that two kids isn't bad, but it starts getting difficult with three little ones.

 

sahmof3 - February 8

When my dd (2nd child) was born everything about it just seemed easier. Baby care was 2nd nature, I was more relaxed, etc. I was worried about Nathan going from having sole attention for 3 1/2 years to having a sibling, but he did great! It was our neat little compact family lol. Then we had our 3rd 17 months after #2 was born. Well, the nursing, baby care, etc. was easy, but the dealing with 2 under 2 was quite challenging for awhile. So was getting out the door, going anywhere that is unbabyproofed and keeping an eye on each of them and all of that. Plus, the children then outnumbered the parents LOL. But my youngest is 19 months now and beginning to act more like an older kid, so it's getting much easier...

 

ry - February 9

Aurorabunny-you took the words RIGHT from my mouth! I would try to get pregnant right now but I am so scared about handleing two babies, some days I am so crazy with just my 10 month old that I cant even imagine having 2 babies! I think we are gonna try again come fall.

 

Emily - February 9

I agree with sahm at least on most part of it. When I had Marcy, Mary was almost 23 mos old. Everythign seemed much easier. the labor (even though it was still 12 hours long, but hte first was 42 so you know it was easier....) and delivery was earier the epi worked bettter, recovery was 110% easier. I didn't need much in the way of pain meds (and I am the wolds biggest baby when it comes to pain, I can not handdle pain at all) The epesiotomy was better and didtn hurt. I felt so much better. It was easier bf and caring for the second. It even seemed easier to get the second to start sleeping through the night. It is tougher to get out of the house and potty training the iolder one was put on hold as we didn't have the time or evgery to mess with it. it was easier to change the diaper than to remind her to go potty. As it turned out, that part was for the best anyway cause while we had intorduced the potty, we didn't push it and she ended up traingin herslef. One day she jsut siad she didn't wasnt ot wear diapers anymore and put ont he underwear she got for Christmas. That was the end of that....but it was (and sitll is) harder to get out of the house. and bathtime is hectic as bath is opart of our night time routine and they both want a bath and then cuddled at the same time. Another thing taht was hard for us was that Mary loves her baby sister too much sometimes. We never had any real jelousy issues but she wanted to hold he all the time and play with her and she didnt' get that Marcy was too little. It is better now caus Marcy likes it when Mary plays with her and Mary has learned she can not picke her up....I too want anohter one but not so close to these two. I think three that close together would be hard, but my mom did it, she had three under teh age of three...(number three was an oops right after the birth of number two....)

 

Nerdy Girl - February 9

I personally thought it was a bigger life change to go from one kid to two than from not having kids to having one kid. Of course it is a huge life change to have your first baby, but if you are in a marriage/partnership then there are two of you and one baby. Once you have two kids, it's like "man on man" defense. And if you are a sahm, then you are just simply outnumbered during the day. With one baby, you can plan your day around the baby's schedule and can certainly get things done while they nap. I remember making all of these gourmet meals for dh when my first baby was little. I had time to work on her baby book and also made her a gorgeous first year album on par with a wedding album (I am a professional photographer). With two kids, it's very very different. Mine are 3 years apart and my oldest stopped napping right around the time of the youngest's birth. I love both of my children more than life itself, but I would be lying to say that I am totally thrilled with how things are right now. I am tired and stressed. Both of my kids are high energy and still at somewhat needy ages. I feel like I never get a break during the day and I am totally exhausted. Has anyone else felt this way?

 

sahmof3 - February 9

NG... yeah I do! It's easier now than when I had a 5yo, 17 month and newborn... but having one in school, 1 preschool age and 1 toddler age... it's a balancing act for sure... they play together a lot now, which saves my sanity ('cept when they're fighting lol)... but they all have such totally different needs and are in such different stages!!!! It's hard not to feel like I'm slighting someone all day long...

 

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