If Anyone Is Feeling Like A Bad Mom Read This OT

29 Replies
sashasmama - January 13

I used to have a really good friend in college, we spent all of our time together. Then she started getting into doing drugs and we stopped hanging out. When I got pregnant I happened to see her at the public library, she was on drugs really bad and looked horrible. She told me she had an abortion, and that she regrets it and wants a baby really bad. Then when my daughter was about 3 months old I heard that she was pregnant again. I called her when her baby was born and went to see her, she said that she has stopped doing drugs, and "only smoked pot" when she was pregnant, that made me so mad. So when her baby was about 1 month old she text messaged me "we just dropped the baby at my moms and took a hit of acid"!!! Can you believe that?! I thought we would be friends again, and our kids could play together etc. I messaged her "that's really sad" and she got all mad at me, talking about how I used to be the only one that understood her, and that just because she's a parent now doesn't mean she needs to stop "experiencing" things! That's horrible, I stopped calling her...And every time I feel bad about letting my dd watch noggin for 20 minutes or wanting some time to myself and feeling like a horrible mother, I think of her. How can you do that to a new life? That baby deserves the best start, and now she's not just ruining her life, she's ruining his. Oh yeah not to mention that she NURSED!


Felisha - January 13

well i want feeling like a bad mom and i am not by any means shape or form defending her. she needs help and as much as i hate to get in other business i would urge you to call cps and get that woman help. they may let her keep her baby if she goes through rehab


sashasmama - January 13

I've thought about doing that, but then decided to let God do what he has planned for her. Her husband is on drugs too, so they are both doing it, and neither one would stop, you'd think such situation as being pregnant and having a child would bring some common sense to your mind, but I guess not in her case. I just hope she realized it one day soon.


Renea - January 13

Sashasmama---have you ever thought that God's plan involved you helping that little baby out of this bad situation. Just a thought


CyndiG - January 13

God didn't bring sin into the world. It's never God's plan for anyone to live in sin. Especially not an innocent little baby. It's God's plan for them and all of us to acknowledge our sin, to turn to Jesus and ask for forgiveness. That's not what's happening here, so I agree with Renea. JMO.


meg - January 13

I also agree with Renea! You have to do something! That poor little baby has done absolutely nothing wrong & does not deserve what is happening...it makes me sick to my stomach to even think about it.


CShell - January 13

I think it would be best to call cps, by doing that you could stop something really terrible from happening to that baby.


maryl14 - January 13

i agree with the other ladies you should call someone for help if you live in the states they will make her and her hubby take cla__s and be screened for 1 1/2 yrs to ensure that they stay clean the baby is not getting the best of care maybe the grandmother should have custody so has to ensure that the baby is in a healthy environment i have a cousin the use to do things like that and then when someone called social services and they came to the house w/ a drug test in hand it shocked her into doing the right thing for her baby now that baby is 3 and doing great and my cousin has been clean ever since that day 2.5 years ago and you dont have to give your name when reporting this


Angiconda - January 13

You should atleast tell her mom and maybe let her family get involved. That baby did not ask to be born and brought into this world with parents that would rather do drugs then thing about their childs well being. I also agree with Renea.....if you dont say something who will maybe no one ever will and that poor innocent baby will be the one to suffer. I know you probably don't want to get involved in it but please do it for the skae of the baby


Felisha - January 14

if it were you who had the drug problem and needed the help but was unable to do it on your own wouldnt you want your loved ones to save your babies from having to live in the horrible enviornment you created for them. Call cps save that baby and give her mother a chance to be a mother to that girl because people who do drugs usually end up dead or in jail and she wont be able to be a mother in either of those places. or try an intervention first make her see what she is doing to herself and her child. all i know is she may be an addict to whatever it is that she is doing and kicking a bad habbit isnt easy to do alone


jb - January 14

I agree with Felisha and Renea. You need to do something to help this baby. Just think, you could stop the harm this baby is enduring if you call CPS. If you ignore it, I personally think you are just as guilty as the mother.


mandee25 - January 14

That girl is messed up! It is sad when you hear about things like this. My cousin, who I use to be close with, ended up hanging around these druggies and she got caught up with a cocaine bust and had her 4 year old daughter taken away to live with her grand mother. She has to go to rehab. I don't understand people like this. What are they thinking? Children DESERVE better!


punkin01 - January 14

i agree you need to report this i know this is worst case but what IF you dont report it and something horrible happens and that baby died would you be able to live with the fact that you could have made an anomyous(sp?) phone call and got the parent the help they need and the baby a proper caregiver in the mean time until they can be suitable parents again.....could you live with it???? see i am stuck in a situation now where this young girl has a baby and she works part time her parents work and a__sist her in taking care of baby but she spends money on drugs and partying (she is 17) and when it comes to formula she will not sign him up for WIC and she stays up all nite and partys so during the day she sleeps and keeps him in bouncy seat (he has NO hair on the back and sides of his head from being in it so much and a flat spot from hell) he is 7 mos old and can bearly stand and i know when my DD was 7 mos she was standing and in her walker pushing around she walked at 91/2 mos this baby acts as if he is 3 mos old in that respect no tummy time ever she wont get him approved for medicaid so this baby has no insurance if he just got out of the hospital with RSV and pneumonia and he has no ins to get medicine her parents work their b___ts off they are very poor and struggle big time and help her all they can adn formula she uses half the amount of powder to the full amount of water to make it go further he gets no baby food just watered down formula and it is so sad and i dont know where they live they just moved and i dont know where to tell DHR to go so i feel stuck .....this baby deserves better and i wish i could help him


punkin01 - January 14

also forgot to add this baby has had no shots since he was born because she dont have insurance she just moved here from another state where the babys daddy told her to get out in the middle of the night after an argument and said he wasnt ready to play daddy he only had fun making the baby so she moved here with her mom and dad and due to two extra people in the house they had to find a bigger place


jessb - January 14

I work for CPS please call them and tell them everything you said here.


Renea - January 16

sashasmama-just wanted to check in and see how things are with your friend. Did you report her? My prayers are that you do the right thing.


sashasmama - January 16

When I said I wanted to let God do what he had planned for her, what I meant was let God put her on the right path, and not let her keep doing drugs. I'm still not sure if I should do anything about this...I just feel like it's not my place, I thought about telling her mother, but I don't have her number, but I really don't want to call the cops, I don't know..............I know that you guys think I should do something about this, but...I haven't talked to her since that time. I want to think that they stopped what they were doing, but I know they didn't. I saw them with their baby, and they love him, and they don't understand that they are doing wrong...I don't know



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