Should I Take My Son To The Hospital

33 Replies
flower.momma - January 13

This is also a question about discipline. My 2-year-old just bit my 6-week-old's finger extremely hard. I could see mega bite-marks, but she didn't break the skin. I finally have him calmed down and asleep after about 20 minutes of horrible screaming. I am, however, worried about a broken bone. I spanked my-two-year-old's hand, after taking a deep breath and getting over my initial instinct to throttle her, put her in the time-out chair for a few minutes, then told her that she had to play alone and was not allowed to leave her room for another 15 minutes. Oh yeah, and the lecture of the century. Was I too harsh? Too lenient? Aaaaaah. I am so frustrated and I know she just got caught up in the moment and didn't think, but you should have seen those bite marks! After her "alone time" is over I plan to drop the whole matter all together and go on with our day. I just hate being mad at her. I hate it when she does things that warrant that kind of discipline. My son is now asleep, and doesn't wake up when I touch or bend his hurt finger. It is a little swollen, but I am just worried about his tiny little bones! Should I wait it out and see if he fusses later when I touch it, or should I take him in?

 

Kara H. - January 13

Gosh I will probably catch hell for this...but here it goes. I personally do not agree with slapping hands. I am fine with smacking a clothed bottom, but I think hand slapping is disrespectful and it is hard to judge how much force you are using and how much pain you are inflicting. However, with all of that said, I am a firm believer that the only way to deal with a child that is a biter, is to bite them back. (ah yes, I can feel the heat coming already). I think kids have no idea how much pain they can cause biting an giving them a small taste of how it feels really helps to nip that behaviour in the bud. As for your babies finger, most breaks in children (and a lot in adults) will not even show up for about 24 hours in an xray. I would re-evaluate the finger situation tomorrow. If it is still swollen and he acts like it hurts, then I would take him to the ER. Good luck, sounds like you have your hands full! :)

 

CyndiG - January 13

I would probably call his pediatrician. As for the punishment, I'm all for spanking. Bottoms, hands, and legs. I think you probably went just a teeny bit overboard with a spanking, timeout, and sending her to her room....LOL! But I totally understand where you were coming from! I bet she won't do that again. LOL. It's funny from the outside looking in, but definately not from in there looking out! At any rate, I would call his pediatrician and see what they say. You can never be too cautious. ps Kara, I agree with the biting thing. My dd used to bite me on the stomach (that's just where her little mouth came to on me). It hurt like crazy, and one day I'd had enough. I bit her on her forearm just hard enough to leave teeth marks. She never bit again. But, if you're going to do that, you have to do it right after they bite, so they understand why you did it. Kind of like a puppy peeing in the floor. :O} Good luck. Let us know how he is!

 

flower.momma - January 13

Believe me, she knows that biting hurts. I did not slap her hand to hurt her, I slapped her hand to get her attention. I would never hit her hard enough to cause physical pain. In fact I have tested the hardness of the slap on my own hand and it doesn't hurt. That is why I gathered myself and calmed down a bit before doing it, so I wouldn't hurt her in anger. I know it is just a difference of opinion, but I personally believe that biting is a lot worse than a gentle slap to say "Momma means business!!!!" Thank you for the advice about the finger. He still acts like it is a little tender, but it is no longer swollen and red.

 

flower.momma - January 13

The reason she knows that it hurts is because we had an issue with it this summer, and rather than biting her back I acted overly theatrical. I cried and said "Ow!" over and over. She came up, gave me a hug and said "hurt mommy?" I said yes and she said "Sorry mommy." Then she kept talking about it for the rest of the day. She would act sad, and then say "hurt mommy."

 

sahmof3 - January 13

I think your reaction was reasonable. It's a big deal and I'm sure she knows that now lol. It's hard dealing with the feelings you get toward your older one when they act up, because when you only have the first one you cannot believe you could ever have those feelings toward them... you'll both be ok, though :-)

 

sahmof3 - January 13

...and I second what Kara said about re-evaulating his finger tomorrow...

 

torbman - January 13

My daughter did this to my younger daughter when they were little too. the thing about baby bones is that they are pretty soft too so have a look tomorrow and see then. I am for biting back too. Although I do think it depends on the child. My oldest girl you had to show her physically but the younger one you would hurt her feelings just by looking at her. I don't think you over reacted.

 

Rhiannon - January 13

I completely agree with Kara. When I was younger, I was a biter. I used to get mad and bite my own hand. It would be so bad I would leave bruises One day my mom bit me after I had bitten myself and I never did it again. I was shocked that my mom would do that. But by all means wait until tommorrow. You should be concerned with why she did it. Was it a plea for attention?

 

flower.momma - January 13

Ummmm, Rhiannon, she's 2, does she need a reason?

 

Kara H. - January 13

:) I think what Rhiannon was saying, was she feeling left out or ignored? I'm sure she loves little brother, but doesn't like sharing him with you. It still doesn't excuse her behaviour at all, but 2 year old aren't know for their stellar ability to express complex feelings with words. She may be needing some extra one on one time you. :)

 

Nerdy Girl - January 13

I agree with evaluating the finger tomorrow and calling the pediatrician if it seems necessary. After living thru having my oldest bite, hit, and claw my youngest multiple times when he was a newborn, I would advise you to keep close watch over the two of them to make sure nothing more serious happens. Good luck - you are in a very tough time with those ages but it will get better.

 

flower.momma - January 13

O man, this night just keeps getting worse. My son had an explosive poo, so I decided to take a bath with him. I washed up first while he sat next to the tub in his bouncy seat. My dd sat was in with us, talking to me and everything was going great. I started to wash my face with foaming face wash, which I think has sacylic acid in it. I sat the bottle on the side of the tub and I hear my dd say "wash face?" And I say "Yes, mommy's washing her face." Then I hear her say it again and I think "OH NO!!!" I opened my eyes, getting soap in them, then catch her arm mid-swipe as she tries to wash my son's face!!! I am sitting there with soap in my eyes, half out of the bath-tub, holding her arm and calling for hubby. She's upset because I'm upset, and she was just trying to help. Thank God I got to her before she got it on his face or in his eyes. After that she wouldn't stop crying, she felt so bad and was so confused. I told hubby to hold my son and I snuggled her for a really long time. Poor girl, she's had a rough day! Never a dull moment here.

 

Rhiannon - January 13

Thanks Kara. That's exactly what I meant. flower.momma. Your daughter is probably feeling left out. Two years old is still really young. She is used to being the baby and perhaps you need to spend some time with just her.

 

flower.momma - January 13

I think it was just a spur of the moment thing. We were all just sitting on the couch and she grabbed his hand and said "Matchoo me Flynn." (which, in poppyspeak means "nice to meet you, Flynn") Then she bit him. She is actually adjusting quite well and I'm sure she does have her moments of feeling left-out, but I think in this case, it was just a moment where she lost control and did something that she wouldn't normally do. I remember doing stuff like that as a kid, and then when the gravity of what I'd done hit me, thinking "why did I do that?"

 

flower.momma - January 13

I spend a ton of one-on-one time with her. When my son naps in the morning, I always give her at least a few hours of "just us" time. We color, do puzzles, look out the window together, talk about what she wants to be when she grows up (a giraffe). During this time I don't clean, turn on the TV, or fuss over Flynn, unless he wakes up hungry. I know she is having trouble with the change in our house. But honestly, I don't think I could possibly give her anymore of my time without neglecting my son, my husband or my household duties, which I am already neglecting quite a bit.

 

BriannasMummy - January 13

Awe!! Sounds like you all had a very very rough day! Im sure Poppy didnt mean to hurt her brother.. and Im sure she didnt do it out of anger.. shes 2... 2 year old dont always think their actions through. I dont think you overreacted though.. even if she didnt think it through.. she does have to know the gravity of what had happened.. that was she knows never ever ever to bite her little brothers fingers ever again! I think you are doing everything you possibly can to make sure that the transition goes smoothly.. there are always bumps in the road.. and today just happened to be an extra big one. Keep an eye on his fingers.. and if they are swollen and painful tomorrow.. then go see a doctor. Im sorry that youre day was so rough.. and I hope tomorrow is soo much better! When you wrote about her trying to wash his face.. and then crying over your reaction.. i felt like coming through the computer to give her hugs too! Keep your chin up.. things will get better! ~Kristin~

 

ADD A COMMENT:


You must log in to reply.

Are you New to the forum? Sign Up Here! Already a member? Please login below.

Forgot your password?
Need Help?
New to the forum?

Sign Up Here!


Already a member?
Please login below.





Forgot your password?
Need Help?