So Depressed Need Advice

16 Replies
KRC - May 12

Hi everybody, my ds will be 5months this 14. My question is well i have so many so my questions are, When to give him gripe water, and should i have to give him gripe water everyday. Because when ever i give him gripe water he will throwup, i tried all timings and al the ways. like after feeding him, before feeding him, 1-2hrs after feeding him nothing is working. I feel so sad for my baby. He is a very bad nurser. He hardly drinks milk. I have to keep feeding him every half hour literally. he only takes for few seconds( I am serious) and then let go if i force him he will cry. And then start being cranky after half hour. about sleeping I have to rock him for may be hours sometimes there is not even a single time where he has slept by himself. I tried CIO but after few mins I feel so sorry for him and i will pick him up. This is so frustrating I dont have time for myself. I am not able to leave him for even 1 min for doing my work, inbetween i have a very bad bad back pain. Ladies please help i am a first time mommy. I know you guys are great and very helpful, so please help i am so desperate. where am i wrong. thanks

 

Bonnie - May 12

Hi KRC, first (((HUGS))), it can be so difficult when they ahve these problems. Secondly, this sounds like your baby may have a reflux problem. Have you looked into that at all? By 5 months, colicky behaviour should have calmed down a lot. And while spitting up is not usually a problem, it can be. If he is refusing to nurse a lot, he may be having pain from the acid levels coming up. This problem is generally characterised by extreme spitting up (though not always), refusal to eat (again, not always), taking a small amount of food then pulling away crying, arching the back when eating, not sleeping well (because of pain), etc. In a case where reflux is a problem, CIO will not work as the baby is suffering from the acid levels. There are mild cases of reflux and sever cases and it is a horrible thing to have to deal with. Take a look at the info section on www.infantrefluxdisease.com and check out the signs and symptoms page and let me know if you think this may be the problem. As soon as I saw that list I knew exactly that my son was dealing with reflux.

 

Maggie - May 12

Hi KRC. First and foremost, stop beating yourself up. You are doing the best you can. What you need to do is get your focus back and get the pediatrician on the phone NOW. It is a rule of thumb that if the baby is refusing to eat you need to get him in to see the doctor. If your doctor is not available today take the baby to the ER at the nearest hospital. If you have no transportation call for an ambulance. Your ds could be having problems with reflux. When your baby does not want to nurse and they are crying and fussy it could be a sign that they are sick. Please let me know what happens. Good luck.

 

grandma - May 12

sounds like he may be ready for some rice cereal to fill his tummy. I'm all for b___st feeding but, if this has been going on for this long you may want to consider a bottle feeding. Have you talked to the doctor about his feeding problems? I'm not big on CIO. If a 5month old has had a good feeding, diaper change, and you know they are tired a few mins of CIO may be in order. Some babies prefer to be left alone to fall asleep but it sounds like he still has the feeding issue to deal with. Don't lay any guilt trips on yourself. If a baby is crying and hungry and won't settle down trying other methods may work. Nursing is not about you...it's about a happy baby and right now he does not sound happy. Grip water is good for upset tummies and has it's place. I would suggest not using it for now. If it has not worked yet put it aside. Good luck and let us know how it works out. Keep up the hugs and rocking

 

KRC - May 12

hi bonnie, maggie and grandma thanks for your quick reply. that really made me feel better. I did talk to my doc about this but she said that he is not losing any weight actually he is in the 90th percentile so dont worry. ANd grandma i am giving him solids atleast trying to its not going well either. He refuses to eat. I am lost and i dont know what to do.

 

KRC - May 12

one more question, do you guys think i should stop b___st feeding and start formula. I was planning to wean him after 6months anyways.

 

Bonnie - May 12

KRC, most peds are not very versed in reflux. I hate to sound so against a doctors advice, but I cannot help it when it comes to reflux. If you speak to any of the moms on that Web site I gave you, youwill hear the same thing. My ped also told me the same thing. Mason was in the 95th percentile, he was gaining weight very rapidly and eating TONS of food. I was told it was colic. When it got to the point that Mason was sleeping less than 7 hours in a 24 hour perdiod and cried every waking second inconsolably unless he was eating (the only thing that made him happy), I knew something was wrong. We would have 10 stretches of non-stop crying. Colic my b___t! I was so frustrated back then that I even considered dropping him off at the hospital just so that at least someone there would help him. It was the most horrible feeling. Then I found that Web site and realised that Mason had silent reflux. He was swallowing the acid back down instead of spitting up so it was burning him both ways. He was also comfort feeding. I.e. the formula soothed his throat which was why he ate so well and gained so much weight. I printed out that list of symptoms and gave it to my ped who at that point agreed with me and gave me a trial of Zantac (of what I later learned was too small of a dose). When the Zantac did nothing and I kept calling miserable (I was living on less than 3 hours of sleep a day with a baby who never stopped screaming at the top of his lungs)., the doc sent Mason for an upper GI which sonfirmed the reflux. The ped was not comfortable upping the dose or giving us the strongber drugs like Prevacid or Prilosec so he referred us to a GI specialist. We eventually got on Prevacid and now he is like a normal happy baby.

 

Bonnie - May 12

Sorry to bombard you with such a long story, but I just wanted to show how most peds are not too familiar with reflux. If baby is gaining weight they think it is fine. In your case, if he is pulling away and only taking small amounts of food at a time, I would defnately suspect reflux. Please check out that Web site's symptoms section. As his mommy, I have a definate respect for mommy's instinct. Look at that and then tell me what your thoughts are on it.

 

Bonnie - May 12

P.S. If it is reflux, switching to formula and usuing gripe water is going to do nothing.

 

Bonnie - May 12

Another P.S. (lol) First, pardon my typos, lol. Secondly, IF it is reflux and goes untreated, the acid can cause scarring and damage of the esophagus. They can also develop food aversions where they are scared to eat. So it's important to find out if this is the problem. Getting tested for this (like we did with the upper GI) is not common and does not always show anything so don't be upset if your ped refuses to run tests. I'd just like to know what YOU think about the reflux issue after reading that Web site as I truely believe mommy's know best when it comes to that. If you think that is the problem I will give you some suggestions. I'll check back in a bit! (((HUGS))))

 

Rabbits07 - May 12

KRC, you are not doing anything wrong. I would have to agree with Bonnie that you need to explore the possibility of reflux. Alot of doctors are 'set in their ways' so to speak and won't even consider certain diagnoses(sp?) Be insistent. If your doctor refuses to relent, find another one. The most important thing is your baby's health and if he is refusing to eat there is a problem.

 

Bonnie - May 12

Dealing with reflux broke my heart. I really wish there was more awareness out there on it. Most peds seem to think that as long as baby is gaining weight then it is fine. Well that is true, IF there is no pain. Babies who spit up a lot with no pain and gain weight have no problems. But when pain is involved, docs really need to dig deeper. If it were nto for someone on here recommending that Web site for me, I would have never known. I would have gone insane as trying to deal with a baby in pain is incredibly difficult. Not to mention my son probably would have ad scarring from all the acid and eventually developed food aversions. Peds are way to quick to chalk everything up to colic. I am rarely one to go against a doctor's advice. But when it comes to reflux, peds are just not informed. Most reflux babies do not eat, lose weight, and vommit excessively. When babies do this, the peds are good at cathcing it. But anything out of the ordinary, it goes misdiagnosed. Makes me wonder how many people truely suffer with this problem because the doctor didn't dig deep enough.

 

KRC - May 12

God bonnie the stories down there really sounds bad. Is my baby really has reflux. i wish i had some more time to browse but hey my baby is crying. I will keep updating you. Thanks a lot bonnie.

 

Bonnie - May 12

KRC, yeah, a lot of their stories are pretty bad. But most of them are dealing with extreme cases of reflux. Check out these 2 links...Symptoms page (http://www.infantrefluxdisease.com/infant_reflux_symptoms.php) and the silent reflux page (http://www.infantrefluxdisease.com/silent_reflux.php) and finally...dealing with doctors (http://www.infantrefluxdisease.com/seriously.php) no dashes- in anything if they show up

 

kimberley - May 13

I belong to the same site as Bonnie, as MY 3 month old DD has reflux, and until I found that site, I was very depressed, and had no idea what was going on, and neither did my doctor,...I informed HIM what I had found out and that I wanted something done....He then listened and did something...my DD is getting better every day now. My DD is also very high in the growth charts, but she has terrible reflux...so growth charts mean nothing to a gage of reflux.

 

Hannah777 - May 14

I was told if you boil dill in water and give the baby the water (make sure there are no traces of dill in it) at least a few sips b/f food he won't spit up as much. I have a friend who swears by that.

 

KRC - May 15

Thanks for all your help and concern ladies. My latest update on my baby is he is fine. I stopped feeding him solidfood and thats working great now. I guess he wasnt ready for the solids yet. Anyway from 2 days he is fine and happy. I think i have to start supplementing him with formula if my milk is not enough. Lets see how that will go. Once again thanks a lot everybody especially bonnie. I wish you all the best.

 

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