This Just Really Sucks Ot

4 Replies
LollyM - February 23

I am upset right now because I am just really lonely and miss my hubby. He recently took on a new job and works 12 hours a day, 6 days a week. When he comes home, we barely even spend any time together before going to bed and it just sucks. Today, I spent 4 hours making home made chicken noodle soup, and he only had a few bites before falling asleep on the couch. I got really upset and cried a little... well he heard me, woke up, asked if I was crying because he fell asleep, I said yes and he took another bite of his soup and then fell back asleep.He is still there... sleeping on the couch. It seems like any time I really put effort into a meal, dh doesn't hardly eat it and I'm just sick of spending most of my time with him asleep. I thought marriage meant having a companion, not being so lonely! I see family and friends a few times a week, but I still miss my husband. I am going to start some mommy and me classes soon... but until then I just feel like I'm on the verge of tears every day! This is the life I always wanted... I just don't know why it's so hard! The worst thing is that when I do see family or friends, it is usually because they feel bad for me being alone like I am so it kinda' makes me feel worse. None of them ever call me, I always call them.I have considered not calling anyone for a while just to see if they ever call, but then I don't think I would ever talk to anyone again! Let alone the fact that my best friend never answers her phone so I haven't even talked to her in several weeks. Some best friend huh! I am just tired of feeling sad, lonely, unappreciated and on the verge of tears every day. I just keep trying to remind myself that my baby is so wonderful and that I should just be happy, but it's still hard. It seems like you guys are my only friends these days!

 

eclipse - February 23

I feel for you, sweetie. It sounds like your husband is about working himself to death to provide for you both, but he doesn't realize that he is missing out on you and your little one. It is so hard to be in those shoes, I feel for you. First of all, I can't believe you made homemade chicken noodle soup!!! Can I have some? :P You are a good, caring mom, and just need some tlc right now. I have been where you are, actually still am, and totally can relate. I find that if I take my ds out on little trips, like walking around the neighborhood, the grocery store, target, etc., that I feel much better and happier. I guess its the being out with the three dimensional people. You need some adult conversation and snuggle time. I would make an appointment for a date with your husband first and foremost. Until his schedule calms down, and the baby becomes predictable, you may have to schedule a date night. I would do whatever it takes to have that time with him, and remember it will get better. My advice sucks, but it is 4 am and my baby is wide awake, so I apologize. :) Good luck. I feel for you, hang in there.

 

Kara H. - February 23

Is he not sleeping well at night? My hubby worked those same type of hours for 4 years straight. Yes, he was tired alot. In the last month of working at that company we found out that he has obstructive sleep apnea and he got fitted with a CPAP machine. He was like a new person (he is way more annoying and teenager like than I remember him being). Instead of sleeping 9 hours, he jumps out of bed (sometimes jumps on the bed) after about 6 hours sleep. Anyone who snores has some form of sleep apnea. Chris didn't snore so much as I would hear him hold his breath a lot during the night. Pay attention to how he sleeps. If you hear any of those symptoms, make him an appointment with his family doctor. He will feel so much more refreshed and stay awake more in the evenings. As for you, you need to get out of the house. I would consider a part time job, if you have family or inlaws that can watch your DD. I work 12-18 hours a week and it helped tremendously when Chris was gone all the time. It got me out, I made new friends, and I also had pocket money to buy some new clothes and get pedicures and some long overdue things for me. Take care!

 

USMC_wife - February 23

Aw, Lolly, i know how you feel sometimes. there are times where I just feel so pathetic and wish someone would call me. Seems like nobody ever does. My dh is usually at work 6 days a week, and I'm here all alone with the kids. I long for some adult interaction! Hey, maybe we should exchange numbers so we can call each other! lol.

 

LollyM - February 23

hey everyone, thanks for the support =) Date night is deff a must! His mom was supposed to tell us when she can watch dd, but of course, she has not gotten back to us in two weeks! (big surprise! ha) Anyway, my friend invited me to a party tonight but I am not sure if I should go or not... I posted another thread about it. Kara H, I think he might have sleep apnea... if only I could get him to go to the doctor! ecliipse, now that I have made my own soup, I can't stand the canned stuff! lol. talk to you all soon =)

 

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