When To Start Ttc

13 Replies
LisaB - July 6

Ds is almost 8 months and we are thinking about ttc again for those of you with kids this close in age what are the pros/cons? I still haven't gotten my cycle back as I am bf but am getting eager to start trying.

 

hrsmith - July 6

Hi LisaB. my hubby and i went off bc when he was 7 months. i stopped bf at 2 months so my cycle was back to normal right away. We weren't using precaution but didn't think we would get pregnant right away, boy was i wrong. my cyle started on may 18th so sometime there after i became pregnant. Unfortunately i had a miscarriage at 5wk 3d. I have many thoughts running through my mind as to why it happened, but my doc has told me not to worry and that it was most likely a chromosomal issue. a part of me wonders if it is because of my age. I am almost 33, or if it's because it is so soon after my first child. who knows. I hope this doesn't scare you, but for me I am glad you posted this thread because i don't talk about it very much, but it is always on mind. My hubby and I are going to start ttc again in august. my dr. said i would be fine because i micarried so early. I do feel more comfortable knowing that my kids will be a bit further apart than 16months. I now want to get pregnant more than ever. Oh, I asked many friends about pro/cons of having them so close together and everyone that has them close together loved it. they said they wouldn't have done it any other way. They said it is a lot of work but you get it out of the way all at once. My hubby and I are at a point in life where we are ready to take on the responsibility and we aren't sure yet if we are going to want a 3rd, but if we do, i just don't want to be too far over 35 before we have our 3rd. I am sure we will space the third a little further apart if we've got two little ones running around. So that's another worry of mine. I am guessing I will probably be at least 36 if not older when the third child is born. It's a lot to think about, but age really does play a factor for me. how old are you? how many kids do you want?

 

cae - July 6

First of all, I am sorry for your lost hrsmith. I have a 51/2 month old, and was thinking about TTC when our son was around 10months. To tell you the truth, I am eager to TTC now! But we wait til he is atleast 10months old. I really want them close in age. Yes, I agree with hrsmith, it will be alot of hard work, but atleast you get it over all at once. I would like to hear from others about the pros and cons of having babies so close in age.

 

hrsmith - July 6

Thanks cae. It helps me to talk about it. our secratary has 3 sons. her first two were 16months apart. She told me financially it was hard because eveything comes in two's. She gave a few funny examples like prom dates. She has been a single mom for about 9 years now so her boys were in elementary and middle school when she had to fend for herself for the most part. Her words of wisdom were, "you just do it, you make it work." I think she is right.

 

Rabbits07 - July 6

My oldest two children are 16 months apart and my oldest was 3 1/2 when my third was born. My last few have been 3-5 years apart and to be honest I find that more difficult. My ones that were closer together played well together. With my more recent ones the older ones just aren't into playing the same things as the little ones so it's kind of tough. I'm sure there were some cons...it must have taken alot of energy to care for a baby and 2 toddlers, but I was younger then and I guess had plenty of that to spare! hrsmith, my third was conceived the same month I stopped the pill also. I was stunned that it happened so quick. Like you also I have run every imaginable possibility through my mind as to why I miscarried my 6th baby....I think that is just part of the grieving process.

 

MichelleB - July 6

I cannot offer pros / cons from experience. I am TTC #2. BB is 10 months old now. For me, financially, it was smart to wait this long as I will get my EI again after being back to work for 6 months. I too want my children close in age. Good luck TTC!

 

LisaB - July 6

hrsmith so sorry about your loss. I am 31 and we want 2 kids. It took me nine months to have a succesful pregnancy I had an ectopic pregnancy and a miscarriage before ds and it was pretty bad. I am not looking forward to the 1st trimester at all sooooooooo scary for me. Anyway I still haven't had my period so we can't start trying yet but I am ready I think. Tonight I was bathing ds and I started thinking how would I handle another one? People do it all the time so I'm sure we'd manage. It would be great for the kids to be around the same age. Also I don't want to be 35 and trying yikes.

 

jas - July 6

<-- Almost 35 and thinking about a third... What's "Yikes"??

 

LisaB - July 6

jas please no offense I just had problems in the past an ectopic pregnancy and a miscarriage, as you know the older you get the harder it can be. I went thru hell getting preggo and I don't want to wait til I'm older and my chances go down. I don't mean to offend sorry if I have. I just want to be able to have another bundle of joy.

 

hrsmith - July 7

LisaB. I will keep you in my thoughts. I am sure things will go much smoother the second time around for you. We are for sure going to start trying after my next cycle. my dr. told me to wait and see what my next cycle was like, but that she figures it will be fine since i miscarried so early on. Please ladies keep me posted if you become pregnant. I am really enjoying this forum(all though some people can be snippy sometimes). I have the summer off so i find myself checking the posts frequently.

 

Rabbits07 - July 7

hrsmith, I was just wondering....when I got preg with my third I had just stopped the pill. My doctor had advised waiting until I had 3 full cycles before ttc (we were away from home with no protection and it was just one of those--oh, one time won't matter moments--.) I got preg right away just like you and worried since my dr. had told me to wait, but all turned out fine. That was back in 1993, but I was just wondering if they do not advise you to wait 3 cycles any more or was that perhaps just my docs own preference?

 

nic nac - July 7

LisaB, I hear what you are saying. So sorry you had difficulties. I am 34 and my dd is 6 months so i have no choice but to be 35 when we start again. Dh and I want to start early next year. I developed gestational diabetes and had to get insulin and I am more prone to getting it again so I won't be looking forward to that. I am scared to be 35 and pregnant just because of the statistics. But I don't have a choice if I want to have another one soon. I will have to bite the bullet and deal with 2 little ones, LOL.

 

hrsmith - July 7

Rabbits07. the only thing my dr. said was that it might take a few months to conceive when you go off of BC. Maybe i misunderstoon her. I'll have to ask when i get pregnant again(hopefully).

 

dedaa - July 7

I am pregant now with my third and got pregnant when my youngest was 6 months. I am ready for it now, I was scared at first of taking away from my lo that I have but now cannot wait to see them play together. I think you should base it on when you feel you are ready. Only you know when it is time for another. Good luck!

 

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