Will She Know I Quot M Her Mom

8 Replies
JMux - May 12

My dd is 5 months old today. I was only about to stay home with her for 3 months. :-( Before I had her I was working 55+ hours a week, but it was agreed that I would work 40 hours after I had her. My old boss left and now I have an old hag who doesn't do anything! I am creeping towards 60 hours a week - I hate it! I am doing everything I can to try and find another job, but the job market here isn't that great. I try to be with my dd as much as I can, but sometimes I can't be. She's not at her daycare anymore than the regular time - the rest of the time she's with her dad. But since I don't get to spend as much time with her, I'm afraid she won't know I'm her mom. Please no comments about how I shouldn't work - I would LOVE to be a SAHM, but that's just not an option right now. I always make sure that I'm home to give her her bath and put her to bed, and I'm always the one with her in the morning. It's the evenings that I miss. Will she know me as her mom or just that lady who wakes her up and puts her to sleep?

 

Marlene - May 12

JMux she knew you were her mother from the day she was born. You have a scent and a bond that no one can break. I do know how you feel I drop my 2month old son off at the babysitter at 8:30 and dont pick him up until 6:30. Just know that your she will know you are her mom and that you are away from her all that time not because you want to but because you have to. And when you get home try to spend every moment you have with her. I hope I was able to help you a little bit.

 

Rabbits07 - May 12

There are many women in your situation. I think babies are able to distinguish their mom from others even at a very early age. As far as the amount of time you are able to spend with her...just make it count. Sometimes quality matters more than quant_ty.

 

J.J. - May 12

I work full time and pick up my son from daycare after work, and the smile on his face tells me he knows who I am. My mom worked full time w/me in a demanding political job but she always spent quality time with me and I admired her for it. I hope to follow the same model.

 

HannahBaby - May 12

its not about how much time you spend with your kids, its about the quality. If you spend real quality time with your children it doesnt matter if its only an hour everyday.

 

Shea - May 12

I also work a demanding job, and I understand how you feel. I really miss the time with my son, but I try to focus on the positive things my working is providing for him. Eventually a better job will come along. Meanwhile, have faith and know that she knows you are her mom and that you love her.

 

JMux - May 12

Thanks everyone. It's good to hear I'm not alone. Sometimes it seems like everyone has more time to spend with their kids than I do.

 

mommy2be27 - May 14

I work at a daycare. The bad news... some kids call me mom. They also call all the other a__sistants, the owner, the Schwanns woman, and their mom...mom. The good news...these are kids that are learning their first words. They don't know (or can't say) my name, so to get my attention they call me mom. At first it freaked me out, but as time pa__sed I realized just about every kid went through this. One who has been there 2 years progressed from "Ma" to "Caffy" to "cathy" to "miss Cathy". So, the point is, you may hear your child call someone else mom... but don't worry. It is just a stage. Make sure your daycare reinforces the name (everytime I'm called mom I remind the child I am Cathy). It was always obvious the child knew their own mother as they ripped theirselves from my arms to get to their mom.

 

J.J. - May 15

To follow up on that last post: I didn't go to daycare til I was 3. From 10 months to 3 yrs a friend of my mom's took care of me full time (she had 2 boys of her own). Her name was Helen, but I called her HelenMommy. Because of the time we spent together, she was crucial in my potty training, language skills, etc. Despite all that, she never took the place of my real mommy. My mother knew that and appreciated that I liked the person taking care of me.

 

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