What If I M Super Shy

18 Replies
Renae - November 14

I am due in february, and I am terrified of labor, because I am so, so, SO modest. I don't want people pulling my feet up to my ears, and I don't want my body exposed. Is it possible to have a sheet over you at all times? Please don't tell me, "oh, once you're there, modesty goes out the window and you don't care" - trust me, I will care. I'm sure alot of people get over their fear once in the situation, but I know that I will not.

 

Melissa - November 14

I have yet to have a baby, ut am trying to. Anyway, I was in the delivery room with my best friend when she gave birth. SO was her husband and her mom. I would definitely say she is a modest person as well. Maybe not as much as you, but she is really shy. Anyway, by the time it came to pushing, she truly DID NOT CARE who was there or what they could see. Unfortunately, this is part of it and it will be worth any embara__sment that you feel. There simply is no other way out unless you had a ceserean.

 

MC - November 14

Well, it's true. I'm extremely modest, but when it gets to a certain point I don't care. I can't care, I'm in so much pain. You'll be in a gown with your bottom exposed. If you don't want anyone helping out ("pulling your feet up to your ears"), say so. That's YOUR choice, not theirs.

 

MC - November 14

Even with a section, you'll be exposed.

 

mama-beans - November 14

Youcan ask to have a sheet draped the whole time, but I GUARANTEE you that when it is actually time to push, the entire NFL could be in that room and you really won't care.... and to be honest, neither will they. Your "parts" at that moment are NOT s_xual in nature... And anyone who sees anything will just be in AWE that our bodies can do what they can.. no one will think "hey, I saw Renae's hoochie coochie when she was pushing the baby"! I was sure to keep hubby by my head so he didn't get too graphic of a view ( he appreciated that) but he also held one of my legs for me, and did get to see his daughter be born. He was SQUEMISH in the extreme before, but now he is so glad he got to be a part of it! Believe me, you will be fine.

 

Sita - November 14

Hi Renae, omg, Im also terrified of being exposed during labour and having my body "on show".I have also had countless pple tell me 'it'll be the last thing on your mind at the time' etc. But that hasnt stopped me worying about it. So Ive decided to have a water birth, for the privacy it allows you and the benefits of water during labour. Im also having my first so Im too scared to have him at home,(where you can have all the privacy you like!!) so the water birth option was the next best thing. See if they do them at your hospital. Aside from that, Ive noticed that the midwives are very discreet and professional when it comes to nudity, if that makes you feel any better. I would just let your doc/midwife know how you feel about the modesty issue and Im sure they will do thier best to keep you covered up. Try not to stress to much about it, Im sure it will work out. Good luck!!

 

micheline - November 15

I dont know if anyone is going to read this, I went on this site a couple of weeks before I had my little girl. Madyson was born August 30th and was 3 days late. I was induced that morning and it was rough!!! Anyways, I just want to reply to the whole being modest thing. I WAS THE SAME WAY!!!!! I asked my mom to be there with my husband and I. Now... for years I said I would never have her in there because down there is not a place for my mom to see!!! and the thought of having nurses and a doctor I dont really know seeing that part of me.... good I felt so sick thinking of it. I can still remember when they put my feet up in those things and I bore all to whom ever was in the room. But then you get pushing and you dont forget... but its not all the important to you as it was before, the most important thing is getting that baby out so that you can finally hold him or her..... I think the worst is that people tell you that you poop when you deliver.... god that is all I could think about......... I was like, not me.... well my husband says different. Then after delivering when you are resting for those 2-3 days you are in the hospital, the nurse has to look down there even more and if you are having troubles b___st feeding and they touch you.... let me tell you, by the end of the first day.. I gave up caring. If anyone want to talk more about this or my experience im willing to chat just email me at [email protected] or if you have msn messenger add me. I try to get on every day when madyson is sleeping take care and good luck to you all

 

Micheline - November 15

I forgot to mention, to top it all off because i was so numb from the epideral once when the nurse was cleaning me up i farted on her. the only thing I could think to do was laugh, was so horrified....... and like everyone else will tell you and anyone else with these feeling, they are nurses and doctors who go through this so much and have been doing it for so long that its nothing to them...... dont worry

 

mama-beans - November 15

Water birth is wonderful, I have attended several as a support person.. but keep in mind that the tub you soak in is usually white... so anything that may come out of you ( accidental poo, fart, blood, etc) will be in the water with you.. now anything solid is fished out very quickly if you have a midwife, but after baby is born, there is blood and other stuff in the water with you. No big deal, but think about that when you are making your choice.

 

JC - November 16

I'm not going to tell you that you wont care once you are pushing. But I will tell you this: Labor and delivery releases endorphins and hormones into your system that loosen your inhibitions. Its kind of like drugs or alcohol, in that regard. If you watch birthing videos, you will see thew wqomen at the start of their labor more dressed and acting a bit more decorous usually. By the time they are ready to push, they generally will have the hospital gown sot of falling off of them, are making animal noises, etc. Its Mother Nature's way of relieving us from our burden of modesty long enough to actually give birth without tensing up about being exposed. So, dont worry and just let yourself know that you too will be given the same dose of homrones and endorphins and probably will find yourself much more worried about pushing and seeing your baby then about being nekkid 'down there'.

 

amapolitamomma - November 18

I felt the same way, but with all of the pain and anticipation and plain craziness of the situation the feeling goes away. I didn't have any pain medication or an epidural with the birth of my daughter and everything was so intense, painful and overwhelming that I barely even remember the period of time between dilating to 4 or 5 cm. and holding my baby in my arms for the first time. I even had my mom-in-law come in the room because I felt I needed a woman for support. I would have gotten so embarra__sed about her seeing me naked before I was actually in the throes of labor. I felt like some sort of cave-woman, spreap-eagle, grunting and pushing and turning all red, but I didn't care if the whole hospital was watching me. I think I might have cared a whole lot more, however, if I had gotten and epidural or pain meds. Without the pain relief, the only thing in my conscious was the desire to push this baby out and hold her in my arms. There was no room in my brain to think about anything else.

 

Dani - November 18

I'm kink of in agreement with the last poster. I went all natural, too and all I could think about was the pain of labor. I was scared if I had gotten an epidural and was all comfy it would have been a lot more embarra__sing. Oh well, I was embarra__sed enough when I was pushing as hard as I could and peed on the doctor. That was very embarrasing!!!

 

To Renae - November 19

Ask the delivering Doctor to 4-piece drape you when you are ready to push. He can lay 2 up and down drapes on either side of your v____a and one on top and one below your opening also. It leaves a square that exposes JUST the v____al slit that can in no way be identified as yours. Really though, you probably will be much more focused on delivering and welcoming your baby, tell anyone in the room in advance that they are NOT to repeat anything relating to viewing your anatomy or whether you pooped or peed. That is not an acceptable part of your birth story. Good luck.

 

Hi Renae - November 20

Had I known this ahead of time I would have protested, but durning pushing I had the whole floor staff in my room taking weight guesses, but I didn't mind! I'm very very modest, but I was too busy and excited to care!

 

Renae - November 20

Thank you so much for the 4 piece drape advice....that makes me feel drastically better!

 

Shell - November 22

I used to get changed under my clothes and never walk around the house naked and I was SOOOO worried about being exposed and pooping during labor and in our antenatal cla__s they said you could keep a shirt on during labor and that made me feel better.. but TRUST ME when the time came, I was soo hot, I stripped off and you really really don't care, even the extremely modest like me.. when the time comes its all about the baby and the doctors and midwives are so professional.. and I even pooped and I kept apologising and it didn't even matter a bit. So keep your chin up and don't be scared. Wear a long shirt (I had an old one of my husbands) into labor and see who you go from there...

 

love these questions - November 22

when you have that baby which is NOT going to be small, coming out of a VERY small hole, you are going to want it OUT OUT OUT! and you wont care weither you were on national televison or not, you are going to be so focused on just making the pain stop and pushing him/her out that you really wont think about it. i know you said not to say that, but hunni ITS SO TRUE!! and really its a doctor looking down there, no one else (unless the dad will be) and he or she has seen a billion and half of the same things every day! yours is no different then the person who gave birth 20 minutes before you. and as for the dad, if he watches he will be so shocked at how your doing what you doing and watching the "baby" that he will forget what hes "really" looking at. and well if nothing i said helped.. then heres my last one.. you dont have a choice..that baby aint staying in there forever and someones gotta be there, so someones gunna see. really you'll live :) and when you see your baby and hold them. you will fall straight in love and would be willing to do it a thousand times over again :)

 

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