What Would You Do

2 Replies
tomgirl - May 14

I will be 36wks pregnant on saturday. I have a little bit of a pickle on my hands. My father is an endstage cancer patient that is being sent home within the next day on hospice. They give him maybe a week to two weeks to live. I am 400 miles away and considered a higher pregnancy so for me to make the trip to see my father I would have to have the baby. I am looking at the idea of inducement but do not know if it is my smartest bet. To add it all in my husband is currently stationed in Iraq. So the stress leval is high. my biggest fear is that my father will pass away even before i can have the baby so then I would be in the predicment of how do get there to the funeral still pregnant. In the last ultrasound five weeks ago the baby was healthy and developed fine. She was rated on the 25% for her size. I do not want to risk the health of my child or myself but what would you do in my shoes? would you induce? would you risk the travel? would you just miss everything?

 

mjvdec01 - May 14

I would hate to be in your situation. I am so sorry for all that is happening in your life all at the same time. The thing is, If your baby is born at 36 weeks they tpically need about a week in the NICU. a very close friend of mine just had her baby at 36 weeks and this was the case. When babies are in the NICU they want the mother close for the colostrum and to work on b___st feeding. I don't know that you would be able to leave even if you did have the baby early. I really hate to be the one to tell you that. Maybe if you could get to 37 weeks it may be better? I really don't know what to tell you beyond that. What is your OB suggesting? I know several women who had their babies between 35 and 36 weeks and all of the babies ended up fine, but did have a stay in the hospital. My condolences regarding your father, and I hope your hubby comes home safe.

 

WP - May 14

Wow. What an unfortunate predicament. I think 36 weeks is a bit early for an induction - even under these circ_mstances. But even worse, most airlines wont let you fly after 36 weeks, however, I think you may be able to get around that rule with a Dr's note. If it were me, I would want to be with my Dad. You've got a lifetime with your child, but only a few weeks with your father. As long as there's a good hospital you can go to if you go into labour, I would go. But you also have to consider what happens if you do have the baby there. Will you have a place to come home to with the baby? If it's the same place as where your Dad is, that might not be a very good situation. You're not going to be sleeping very much for the first 6 weeks(neither will anyone else in the house), so you have to think about that. Is there someone there to help you? What happens if your father pa__ses away shortly after you give birth? What if you have to have a c-section and are in the hospital anyway? So many what ifs. I hope this isn't too forward for me to ask, but have you or can you ask your Dad what he would like?

 

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