Baby S Heart Stopped

6 Replies
Jenny R. - November 7

A week ago today I went to the doctor for my first ultrasound, my husband and I were so excited we had even told both of our families. Well, we were told the baby had a very low heart rate and was only measuring at 6 weeks (although i was 8 wks. pregnant). My husband and I remained optimistic and I was sent for blood tests on my HCG levels. My levels were rising, but not significantly. I started to spot, but the doctor told me not to worry just yet. Today I went in for my 2nd ultrasound and the doctor turned to me and said, "I'm sorry but I can't find the heart beat anymore." The baby was still measuring at 6 weeks and I was now 9 wks. I felt like I was living in a nightmare. The baby is still inside of me and has passed away. I opted to wait for the baby to miscarry naturally, but am terrified of what is to come. Although this horrible news is obviously very new, I'm wondering how or if anyone ever really gets over a loss like this. I'm so hurt and angry, how do you deal with news like this? I guess my question is, does it ever stop hurting emotionally or is this a pain you carry with you forever? I don't see myself ever being able to let this go.

 

Stef - November 7

Jenny R~ I had the EXACT same scenario. I thought I was 8wks the baby measured 6 wks with a hertbeat of 81. When I went back they couldn't find a heartbeat. I ended up having a D& C a week later because I just could not wait any longer...it was killing me. The D & C actually allowed me to move forward and try to heal...in all aspects. I was terribly sad and couldn't not understand. This was my 2nd m/c so I was just done with trying at that time. All I can tell you is that you will heal and you will feel better. It takes time. Be kind to yourself. I prayed alot! What helped me was reminding myself that something wasn't right with this baby and another one would happen for us and it would be healthy. Well I am 8 weeks pregnant now and everything is going well so far. Of course I am still nervous but trying to keep the faith. They had been checking my HCG levels and last week my doctor was concerned that it wasn't going up as it should...so she called for an ultrasound. I was dreading it because of my last experience...truly I was terrified! I was shaking I was so scared. Well I went....and it could not have gone any better. The baby measured like it should and we saw a STRONG heartbeat. It was so wonderful to replace that horrible memory with a new joyful one. Your time is coming...I am sure of it. Just take some time to heal... I don't preach, but I must tell you I would not have been able to manage without God. So good luck and God bless!!!!

 

Jenny R. - November 7

Thank you so much Stef for your extremely kind words. It's comforting to know i'm not alone, although i'm so sorry for what you have been through. I have been praying a lot also and hopefully things will get better soon. I'm happy for you on your baby and congratulations. I will say a prayer for you as well.

 

Robin - November 7

Hi Jenny ( & Stef ) I also JUST went thru the EXACT same thing as you, Jenny. The doc saw my babie's hear beat at 7 weeks. Then a couple weeks later, hubby & went for a routine ultrasound, and no heartbeat this time. Of course we were devistated and I never did end up miscarrying naturally ( it's been a month ) so I am now sched for the D&C this Friday...uughhh... God bless you thru all of this! & Take care! ( Stef, congrats again on your new pregnancy! :)

 

Emma - November 8

Jenny, sorry to hear you are going through this. I too had virtually the same situation, though never heard the heartbeat and I was already miscarrying by the second scan. Right now you are in a painful place and need to get through an unpleasant experience, but once the miscarriage is over just try to look forward to your next pregnancy. As far as the miscarriage, everyone seems to have a different experience. I was also terrified but it wasn't as bad as a I feared, I had heavy bleeding for two days and saw the sac come out. Then more bleeding and 3 days later the embryo slipped out. Brace yourself for that - you may not see it, it may not be in one piece but ... you might. It's been two weeks now for me and I feel just fine and am hoping to conceive again any time. I will always wonder why that little one didn't make it but I have to accept it was just not meant to be.

 

Cheryl - November 8

I am so sorry sweetie. I do promise you though, you will get through this. I know you don't believe that now, but it is true. About what you said regarding carrying this pain forever, you won't. You will alway's remember it, but the pain will cease. I know. God Bless Cheryl

 

Stef - November 15

Well sadly I need to correct my original note. Things didn't turn out for us. I started spotting, and had another ultrasound. Sadly our little one stopped growing just a few days after our wonderful ultrasound. Not to be scary....but you just never know when something isn't right. Right now I am in the middle of a m/c...my 3rd with no children yet. A sad day indeed! I just feel so worthless....why do my babies keep dying? God bless all of you out there who have been there, will be there and who are pregnant with healthy ones....this pregnancy road is a tough one!

 

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