Am I Really Losing My Baby

7 Replies
AMT31972 - October 13

Hi everyone. I'm new here...just hoping to get some input from you... Wednesday was one of the best days of my life. We've been trying to get pregnant, going through fertility medication for a while now, and last month the doctor told me that the last round of medication didn't work, and now we were going to have to go into surgical treatment that we wouldn't be able to afford for a few years. I don't know why, but just for the heck of it I took an HPT on Wednesday, and it was positive. I got a blood test taken right away and my doctor called me and told me "congratulations"...I am sure you all know the feeling it was. We were so excited. The doctor said my HCG level was at 90 and I needed another test done in 2 days because it was supposed to double. Yesterday a nurse called me after the second test and told me it was at 100, and it was "not a viable pregnancy"...I was in the middle of the grocery store and didn't know what to say, what to ask, and don't know if I remember much else she said, but something about I should get a period in a couple days and then I need to wait until after the next period after that to start trying again...and they need me to get one more blood test done on Monday to see what the HCG level is at then... I can't tell you how much we grieved last night. And to see my husband cry like that...I have no idea how to heal from this. This baby was going to be a miracle and I thought for sure God would protect it for me since it was a gift from Him. And now I'm more confused then ever after searching the Internet and finding all kinds of sites saying "don't depend on the HCG levels if you aren't hurting or bleeding...and it can take more than 2 days for the HCG level to double...and some women have low levels all through pregnancy and have perfectly healthy babies..." I don't know if I should still hope or not. Has anyone been through this or have any advice? -Ashley

 

FrancesM - October 13

Hey Ashley, sorry for your worries about this! I hope you are not going to have a loss. When I had my m/c I had no symptoms at all. I don't want to be negative, I am just being honest. I never had more then 1 blood test (to confirm pregnancy) until I went for my level 2 u/s and that is when they discovered there was no heartbeat and the baby had stopped growing at 10 weeks. By no means am I a pro at any of this so I am not sure what to tell you. I know that everyones HCG levels rise differently so maybe it is just taking time for your body to realize you are pregnant (fingers crossed). Look at AmericanPrgnancy.org. There is an explanation of levels and where they should be etc. I wish you luck and stay in touch.

 

ChattyKathy - October 13

Its not over until you begin bleeding. Some women do go on to have healthy pregnancies even after their little ones get off to a slow start, but remember that this is a red flag. Have hope, but be aware of the situation. There is just no way of knowing for sure yet. Good luck.

 

cynnababy - October 13

Usually when hcg didn't rise at 60% in 48 hours, it's a red flag that the pregnancy is not going the right direction. However, miracles do happen, and some baby just had a slow start. I don't want to give you false hope, but ask for another hcg test, and don't give up hope until you start bleeding.

 

samehere - October 13

I know that in the beginning, hcg levels can be really low and take from 48 up to 72 hours to double and that is in 85% of normal pregnancies which means 15% that are healthy pregnancies don't follow this at all. Your HCG levels did go up, so that is good. They say that you should not put too much into HCG levels and an u/s at about 5-6 weeks would be a lot more accurate but HCG levels should be over 1000 before a sac shows up. Honestly, I believe they should give you another HCG level test 72 hours after the last one before some idiotic nurse calls and tells you your baby isn't viable. That is horrible. I really hope things work out well for you and your baby.

 

julie2007 - October 13

hi ashley - i am sorry you are having to go thru this - i want to say that i like chattykathy's optimism - but i never had bleeding begin and i have had 2 miscarriages this year. i had what they call "missed miscarriages" = where your body holds on to the baby (i was a lot farther along 11w3d +) and i had to have d&c's. --- i am CURIOUS - you said you were on FERILITY MEDS - and if that included an HCG shot - it may have been something to influence your testing. i hope that is not the case. you do not say what meds you were on ----------? OR how far past your AF you were? -------- ? i am glad that you get your next blood test on monday - because maybe you will be plesantly surprised --- i will keep you in my prayers for that. --- what meds / fertility treatments were you doing? (it is amazing - in march of this very year i was sending a post on here wondering if i was really losing my baby too - your post hit home - i hope yours turns out better! -- and i have learned a LOT from that m/c and the one i had aboaut 6 weeks ago too). good luck.

 

AMT31972 - October 14

Thank you so much for caring and for your responses, everyone. I called my doctor and got most of my questions answered...I am going to lose this baby. He said he knows it isn't going to work out since the HCG didn't rise at least 50%. I am not going to get my hopes up anymore for Monday's blood test. I don't know if Baby's in heaven already or if he or she will be soon. He helped me see that although this is so difficult, it showed us that I can get pregnant, and we can keep trying with the fertility meds I was taking before, and maybe I will get pregnant again fairly soon. He also encouraged me that this miscarriage has nothing to do with my fertility problem (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) and it does not mean I will continue to have more miscarriages. I'm supposed to keep getting blood tests and have my HCG closely monitored until it goes back down to zero, and then go through another normal cycle before we can start trying again. We do feel that God gave us one HUGE blessing in the midst of this devastation--we had just tried the last possibility for help ovulating with pills before we were going to have to do extensive treatment, like shots, laprascopic ovarian drilling, or IVF. I had tried a few different dosages of Clomid and Femara, and the last option was a triple dosage of Femara. It apparently worked and I miscounted the days for my 21-day blood test last month, so we didn't think it worked. We were so sad because that meant we were going to have to wait another few years until we could afford treatment that started around $3,000. We feel that although we don't understand why the timing must not have been right this time, at least God allowed us to find out that I did get pregnant so that we could see that we don't have to wait a few years and spend that kind of money...we can keep trying with the triple dosage of Femara, and my doctor told me I can keep trying that triple dosage for as long as I want. It was just a fluke thing the other morning when I randomly decided to take a pregnancy test and found it positive. I could have had this miscarriage without realizing it and not have to suffer from the devastation, but we would not have known that the meds really worked and we can keep trying with them. That really is so wonderful. I just have to figure out how to heal from this now. As soon as I feel like I'm okay, that lump comes right back to my throat and the tears start coming again...but I will continue to trust God even though I don't understand, and I know somehow He'll help us through the pain. I do have another question: what is a miscarriage going to feel like? Just a normal period, or will it hurt more? Is my stomach supposed to be all queasy and is it normal that I have a loss of appet_te? Is that from going through a miscarriage or just from all the stress? Am I going to get sick? I just can't hardly eat and every once in a while I feel like my stomach flips and I have to take deep breaths. Maybe it's all in my head and I shouldn't be feeling a thing. After all, I could have easily not even realized I got pregnant... Thanks again for your concern and prayers. You all sound like wonderful people.

 

FrancesM - October 14

Ashley, I had a dnc so I did not have to pa__s it myself. From what I understand, it is like a period but more intense, there is more blood and tissue. I have read stories that say it was not too bad and heard others that said it was really rough. I am so sorry that this has (might have) happened to you. It is so sad. So you are going to get another test on Monday just to make sure? Is a dnc an option? I wish you luck thru all of this. We are here to listen and try to comfort you the best we can. We have all been thru it, unfortunately, so we know your pain. You are in my thoughts...

 

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