BIT OF A TOUCHY SUBJECT

3 Replies
Mandy1984 - April 22

Hi there, I am having a bit of a problem with a friend of mine and was just looking for a bit of advice as to how to deal with it. First of, I want to make it clear that I am not judging anyone or mean NO harm if this offends anyone.. My friend of 10yrs + has just discovered she is pregnant, she was happy until she found out that the baby will be due in December around the time of her holiday.. She has decided to have an abortion... My problem is I feel sick to the stomach evry time she phones or calls in. I feel like hitting her my temper sores to the point I feel like I'm gonna burst.. I would never ever judge anyone for having an abortion but to have one solely because it will interfere with her holiday... The funny thing is she had her coil (IUD) removed about 3 mths ago as she and her partner wanted another baby she just ''didn't realize'' the dates... Personally I wouldn't have an abortion but then again I have not been in some situations where I might consider it so I try not to judge... I had a m/carriage back in June where I lost my little boy and its only recently that I feel I have been getting over it and what she said about a babby 'interfereing with her holiday' has made me almost hate her....I am currently 16weeks pregnant which makes me feel like I am committing some sort of crime by not saying anything.. Also abortion is illegal in this country (Northern Ireland) unless there is a risk to the mothers health so she has arranged to travel across to a private hospital in England....She will be almost 13 weeks when she has the abortion, What should I do? I really don't want to lose her friendship but its making me feel awful knowing what she is going to do and why, I really wish she hadn't of told me :(

 

felicity2 - April 22

Wow! I am new to this website, and I am shocked. I can't imagine how hard that is on you. I just suffered a miscarriage, and it makes me sick when someone talks about how they hate being pregnant... I WANT to be pregnant. I am not sure how to advise you. I don't think you will feel good w/yourself if you don't say something. If I were you, I would tell her that she wanted a baby...sometimes the timing isn't good. She was lucky to conceive. It may not be so easy the next time. If she decides that her holiday plans are more important than this child, that's her right. If you want to stay friends with her at that point, you have to try to accept her decision. Congratulations on your pregnancy :)

 

AshleyB - April 22

Hi, congrats on your pregnancy! This is a tough situation huh? I don't think I would be able to keep quiet if It were me. I would at least tell her how I feel. Tell her that everything happens for a reason and God didn't give her this child thinking about her precious holiday plans. Obviously it's her decision and her right, but I would at least tell her how if makes you feel. Good luck!

 

Mandy1984 - April 22

yeah I know I should say how I feel but I know it won't make a shread of difference so I reackon I woulld only be attempting to relieve my own 'guilt' so to speak of knowing that she is to have an abortion... With it being illegal here its not really that comman, of course it happens all the time i'm sure, there is just not that much talk of it. FELICITY2 welcome to the website and i'm sorry you had to visit (m/carriage) This website was like gold to me after I m/carried so hopefully you will get some benefit from it although the pain from having a m/carriage is vertually undescribable, thanks for your responses maybe if I just eat my way through the sweetie drawer I will feel better, Pickled cabbage and salsa sounds good right now lol,

 

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