Help Finding Miscarriage Poem For Friend

3 Replies
jessie - October 3

Hi ladies. I have been around for a while, had a mc back in feb 06. There was a poem on miscarriage that helped me a lot that I have lost and cannot find (I have tried Googling). My best friend had an ectopic pregnancy after some losses, and she is now in the hospital to have a tube removed. I would like to find this poem and bring it to her. It is called something like "The Sad Sisterhood" maybe? Does that ring a bell for any of you? Thanks for any help, please feel free to post any other poems that have touched you also, or any ooks that you have read that helped you, etc. Thank you so much! xx

 

jessie - October 3

ok, I found it!!! ************************************A Sisterhood of Sadness I was once a member of the Pregnancy Club, my membership card consisting of two pink lines on a stick. I was eager to pay my dues, just like all the other members. Morning sickness, stretch marks, cravings -- I welcomed them all. But they never came. And before I knew it, my membership was revoked. No real reason -- at least none I could discern -- other than bad timing, perhaps. Or, at least, that's what everyone's been telling me. That and "God's plan." Miscarriage is a terrible word. As if one has dropped something, or carried something incorrectly. Similar to "mistake" or "misunderstanding." How I longed for it to be either of those things when I learned my baby was gone. Surely, it was a mistake, I prayed. If they would just look again, they would learn it was all a simple misunderstanding. But the ultrasound screen showed otherwise. 1 out of every 5 pregnancies ends in miscarriage, say the books. That statistic terrified me when I was pregnant. So many lost babies, I thought. How can I keep mine from being one of them? But now that mine is one of them, that 1 out of 5 seems awfully small. Or, at least, it did. Until soft-speaking female voices started whispering to me in my grief, "It happened to me, too." Their eyes told me the stories of the pain that we shared, the pain that only a woman who has carried a child - and lost it - could know. For some, it was fresh pain. For others, it was dulled by healthy babies since born. A sisterhood of Sadness. It's a silent group, this new club of which I have recently become a reluctant member. Our membership cards are the scars we will always carry on our hearts. Our dues are paid in blood and tears. It is a painful initiation, and one never ceases membership. Because one never forgets. I am joining, not because I want to, but because I wasn't given the choice. But at least I know I'm not alone. At least I know there are hundreds of thousands of women with me, however silent and invisible, quietly holding my hand."

 

jlbko - October 3

Thank you so much for posting that poem. I'm sitting here crying after reading it. The Bette Midler song "Lullabye in Blue" makes me bawl. It's about a baby given up for adoption, but parts of it still ring true. One line says "Every April still reminds me of you, the child I never knew....my lullabye in blue." Makes me bawl - I was due in April. Carly Simon also has a song called "Not a Day Goes By" that hits home as well. Julie

 

Tory1980 - October 7

I was wondering if this one would help any ------------------------------------------------------ My Angel Baby To the baby that I carried But never seen your eyes Or tell you how much I loved you Or ever to hear your cries. You will never be forgotten The excitement we had for your coming. When I realized I'd never hold you, The feeling I had was numbing. My angel baby is who you are. My angel baby you'll always be. Your loving memory will live in my heart So you will always be right here with me.

 

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